Pension - I have none and I’m a little unsettled by DHs response!

So who is his named beneficiary if it isn’t you ?

if you left due to autism and anxiety you should be getting DLA or dong something with reasonable adjustments.

I checked and my named beneficiary on mine was my ex husband from 30 years ago. I'm on number 4 now! Can understand why he needs to check

You’re angry with your husband for not considering your financial security in retirement even though that’s exactly what you’ve been doing for the past several decades?

Stop trying to pass the buck, OP. You’ve royally fucked up by cashing in your NHS pension and choosing not to work. You are responsible for your financial security, no one else. And saying that your husband was happy with you being an artist doesn’t absolve you of the blame for not working.

You’re in a very precarious position. If you were to ask for my advice, I would say you should definitely get back into some form of employment and start contributing to a pension. Do not rely on him. You simply cannot rely on a spouse to be there forever. It’s not realistic.

I know you have autism so perhaps some neurodiverse specific work coaching would work for you.

I thought it was standard - my DH’s (and mine, work in the same place) offer the same. Perhaps public sector pensions are less generous?

Check out your pension forecast at https://www.gov.uk/check-state-pension
To qualify for full state pension you need to have paid at least 35yrs of N.I contributions.
To be fair, I am absolutely astounded that you let him talk you into giving up your NHS pension, whether or not there was much in it. I have a private pension that I haven't paid into for years but it still makes money. You need to stop relying on your husband and sort this out now before it is too late. Maybe talk to a financial adviser.

If you haven’t paid for 30 years into your NI you won’t get a state pension.

This is not true.

You can check what pension you will get using the link posted earlier in this thread.

I would imagine he’s just not sure and will not check and do it? I wouldn’t worry but would be glad he is now checking.

Hello, im actually a chartered financial planner so hopefully can give you some practical tips.

1. Get a state pension forecast ASAP. You need 10 years NI to get ANYTHING and 35 years of NI contributions to get the full amount. If you are short, you can make voluntary contributions (these are worth it compared to a private pension!)

1. Please push DH to confirm nominations on his pension and preferably have this in writing. If you have kids, this isn't so much about you as it is them - they need to be provided for and you receiving his pension will assist with this.

1. Please check you both have valid Wills in place that dictate who assets will pass to in the event of first spouse to die.

1. If DH hasn't drawn his pension yet, find out the value of the pension pot (if a defined contribution pension) and the potential projected income from this. If a defined benefit/final salary pension, what would the dependent's income reduce to if he died whilst in payment or died before he drew it.

1. What does your expenditure look like now and how would that change if he died before you (e.g. less holidays, etc).

1. Based on your potential income on his death (your own earnings, state pension, his pension, etc) would this be enough to cover your outgoings? Note his state pension will stop on death - there are no residual benefits for spouses these days beyond short term bereavement payments which are small.

1. Do you have a mortgage or any other debts that would want to clear if he passed away?

1. Do you have life insurance that would pay out on his death? Either insurance you've sorted personally between you or insurance via his work (known as death in service). What lump sum would this pay out to you/the family and would it be sufficient to clear any outstanding debts?

1. Does he have income protection (either personally or via work) that would cover his income lost if he was suddenly too ill too work or had an accident. If not, could you both cover the bills from savings/assets until he was well enough to return to work.

Please share the above with him. This isn't something to be casual about and you are absolutely not being unreasonable in your worry. My hope is you're completely fine and don't need to do anything, but id you're concerned, please reach out to me and I'll send you my contact info.

As others have said you should check your pension record to see how many years you have credited. If not full you can pay NI voluntarily, like you I make a small income from art so when I did my self assessment tax return I chose to pay very small NI. Stopped doing this when I had enough years. If you left work for medical reasons are you in receipt of any sickness related benefits? If so do they act to ‘cover’ contribution years.
I am assuming that neither of you are retired yet? When pensions (employment/private not state) start to pay out there is usually a ton of paperwork and choices so your DH should have seen then if you were the beneficiary.

Some men have been known to put their mothers or their children.

Named beneficiaries on pensions can be changed with a click OP. I’d be very concerned with his response. Start a private pension for yourself ASAP and start making significant contributions (I would at least match it to his contributions, so say if he is contributing 10% of pay to his pension I would contribute 10% of the household income to mine). And then look for a job.

If you aren’t next of kin for his pension, who is?

Why are you not named on his beneficiary.

You won't get state pension if you haven't paid in enough either.

You need to get this sorted ASAP

If you ever end up divorcing him, get a pensions sharing order.
He needs to maintain you as named as his beneficiary on his expression of wish form whilst he’s alive & married to you. You’ll either get a lump sum, reduced pension for life or combination of both - depends on the type of plan.

All that said, you do need to become financially independent.

Yep, me. Fortunately I didn't listen, but some of my friends did, and regretted it later.

I agree with you but also think that the OP needs to take responsibility for her own financial decisions. Her DH can suggest all he likes, she needed to have done her due diligence and ensured that the finances were in place to cover her before coming out of a pension. What happens if they split up etc? I have my pension that I started when I was 24, nothing to do with DH and he only started pension planning 10 years after me. I think it is so important for women to control their own financial security

I don’t have autism but anxiety alone can make anything to do with money and future planning feel unbearably terrifying. I didn’t open my post for ten years, got CCJs etc, it’s not head in the sand so much as knowing that you can’t or won’t be able to act on any of the things in the letter then why know? It’ll only stress you out more.
I imagine once OP withdrew from work, she heard less and less about what other people were doing and planning and maybe forgot about the future years. Many people do, if you can’t get a job, can’t suddenly improve your finances, what does it matter knowing how poor you’ll be in twenty years time.
I imagine the OP has read all this and become hugely overwhelmed and deleted the thread. I know I would.
If you do see this OP apply for PIP. You have to do this before you’re 65.

Time for assertiveness. Lawyer or CAB with pension documents, so that it's done properly. While you're at it set up life insurance, we'll worth it (as i found to my cost). Yes OP the worst can happen. It's great that you have realised this before it is too late.

@EggnogNoggin my exdh did this - moved all his pensions (£300k× into a SIPP) and once he reached 55 took draw down and gambled it all away! This was before we divorced!

@Fr1tter5

Autism presents differently in men and women.

I know but I don't see what the relevance of that is for this discussion. No one, regardless of whether they have a disability or not, should just assume that they can rely on their spouse to look after all their financial needs without checking or oversight.

Can you pay back missing years into your NHS pension - of by getting contributions back did it close it?

No. Having withdrawn, she has no NHS pension. Even if she did there would be no way to make additional contributions without returning to NHS employment.

First of all it would be a major red flag that your husband is being so blasé about who his pension beneficiary is?, however if your in the uk and married even with a named beneficiary on the pension it will usually go to the current spouse especially if the spouse is financially dependent on the pension holder. Again though the fact he is being so blasé, you made need to start making sure you are financially stable incase you have to stand on your own two feet at some point.

Time to put big girl pants on register for HMRC app and check your NI contributions. If you were claiming CB for a under 12 then liklihood your NI contributions have been covered.

If not work out how many years you would need and start buying them!

As for your DH well no if you haven't contributed or had anything cover that NI contributions you would not get state pension.
How old are you?

It takes 2 mins to set up a beneficiary make sure your DH has as otherwise this is sounding like tipping into financial abuse.
Also make sure wills are clear as well.