I read comments on threads sometimes that suggest that parents seek a diagnosis of autism or ADHD for their children to excuse poor behaviour due to lazy parenting. I don’t think these comments are fair - I would argue that most people who want their child to have an assessment because they believe they may have additional unmet needs do so not because they want an excuse for poor behaviour but they care about their child and want the best outcomes for them. Surely a lazy parent would be one who ignore their child’s needs?
Or I read comments like ‘they still need to be taught to live in the real world’. The inference being that if your autistic child cannot live ‘in the real world’ you have somehow failed them as a parent. As a parent of a child with higher support needs, who medical professionals have said is unlikely to ever live independently, I find posts and comments like these to be insensitive at times. What’s worse is these comments will often come from other parents of autistic children. If you have an autistic child who is successful don’t act like that’s all down to your fantastic parenting it’s probably down to luck and the fact they have lower support needs.
Maybe I am being unreasonable to allow these comments to irk me.