Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask boyfriend about FB picture

82 replies

mushkaa · 18/06/2025 07:49

I’ve been with my boyfriend for a year, it’s all going well. This may seem like a non issue to some, however yesterday my boyfriend changed his profile picture to a photo of me and him for the first time. Thought it was a sweet thing to do. When I went to comment on it I realised he’d turn the ability to comment off. After a quick scroll through, it’s the only photo on there that you’re not able to comment on.

I don’t usually pay too much attention to social media but this has made me feel a little uneasy. AIBU if I ask him why? I really don’t want to come across as crazy!

OP posts:
DontReplyIWillLie · 18/06/2025 09:00

Subbyhubby · 18/06/2025 08:32

Could you change your photo to one of you two, and don’t allow comments and see what he says

My bet is OP would still be waiting for him to notice five years down the line…

DontReplyIWillLie · 18/06/2025 08:59

ComtesseDeSpair · 18/06/2025 08:01

What concerns you about it? My first thought would be that he knows Uncle Jim might make an inappropriate remark, or that he’ll end up with several dozen “congratulations!” type comments from acquaintances who didn't know he had a girlfriend, or every single one of his aunts will end up commenting “so when’s the wedding??” It just all gets a bit tedious.

Edited

This is by far the most likely explanation.

Most Facebook-related posts on here are from women worrying that their partner still appears single (i.e. no tagged pictures, no relationship status update etc.). He clearly isn’t trying to pretend he’s single and is proud to be with you. Try not to invent problems that don’t exist.

TheOriginalEmu · 18/06/2025 08:40

OhCalmTheFuckDownMargaret · 18/06/2025 07:55

I think their point was that in the greater scheme of things there are probably far larger things to worry about in the world right now. Like the prospect of being dragged into world war three and the odd one or two long range weapons slowly being aimed in the rough direction of the UK right now. But hey, your picture on Facebook....

Show quote history

I think you wanna take your own screen name as some advice, tbh.

gannett · 18/06/2025 08:36

I can't even work out why you'd be worried about this? What is the problem with turning comments off?

notacooldad · 18/06/2025 08:36

I think their point was that in the greater scheme of things there are probably far larger things to worry about in the world right now. Like the prospect of being dragged into world war three and the odd one or two long range weapons slowly being aimed in the rough direction of the UK right now. But hey, your picture on Facebook....

Another view it could be good to have a distraction, even a minor one,from the global shit storm we are in.

Boredlass · 18/06/2025 08:34

OhCalmTheFuckDownMargaret · 18/06/2025 07:55

I think their point was that in the greater scheme of things there are probably far larger things to worry about in the world right now. Like the prospect of being dragged into world war three and the odd one or two long range weapons slowly being aimed in the rough direction of the UK right now. But hey, your picture on Facebook....

Show quote history

You are allowed to worry about other things. Personally, I don’t worry about things I can’t control. You must be in a high state of anxiety if you’re worrying about all that. I’d much rather have my mindset

Jc2001 · 18/06/2025 08:33

OhCalmTheFuckDownMargaret · 18/06/2025 07:55

I think their point was that in the greater scheme of things there are probably far larger things to worry about in the world right now. Like the prospect of being dragged into world war three and the odd one or two long range weapons slowly being aimed in the rough direction of the UK right now. But hey, your picture on Facebook....

Show quote history

Ok. So that probably eliminates 99% of stuff people talk about on MN then.

Subbyhubby · 18/06/2025 08:32

Could you change your photo to one of you two, and don’t allow comments and see what he says

gamerchick · 18/06/2025 08:30

MN2025 · 18/06/2025 07:57

He probably doesn’t want a tonne of notifications saying the same thing…

This.

My husband hates notifications. So my facebook is single instead of married. He likes it like that, ruddy weirdo

Olika · 18/06/2025 08:30

don’t waste your time wondering about such things. Just ask him.

sonoonetoldyoulifewasgonnabethisway · 18/06/2025 08:30

Tell him you love the photo, can you tag me in it so i can have it on my wall, your comments will be turned on, if there's anything to worry about someone commenting then it then they can comment on yours

AutumnLover1989 · 18/06/2025 08:28

Serpentstooth · 18/06/2025 07:50

The World is on fire and this is what worries you? Bloody hell.

Maybe it shouldn't have but your post made me LOL at the ridiculousness of it. Bloody hell 🙄😆😆😆

Endofyear · 18/06/2025 08:27

Just ask him!

SeaShellsSanctuary1 · 18/06/2025 08:19

Serpentstooth · 18/06/2025 07:50

The World is on fire and this is what worries you? Bloody hell.

It somewhat ironic that with all that's going on in the world you've found some time to comment on a post that had absolutely no impact on you.

PeggyMitchellsCameo · 18/06/2025 08:12

I would think changing the profile pic to both of you is a really, really nice thing to do.
As for the comments, I absolutely get it. People do tend to leave comments under this type of image, and I think in particular for men, they just don’t want to reply to Aunty Mary and her famous ‘oh won’t you have lovely babies’ comment.
Ditto: people saying ‘you kept her hidden’ and ‘you are punching there, mate!’
Facebook caused me a lot of angst in the past. I deleted it in the end.
The main thing is how he treats you in real life.
And most importantly, if you want to know, ask him.

Iwillclasptheeagain · 18/06/2025 08:11

Serpentstooth · 18/06/2025 07:50

The World is on fire and this is what worries you? Bloody hell.

This is such a sociopathic response, I have always thought.

Belittling human beings for having human feelings about their own concerns.

ShellieAnn · 18/06/2025 08:09

Just ask him, it's probably nothing and he hasn't noticed.

ShellieAnn · 18/06/2025 08:08

Serpentstooth · 18/06/2025 07:50

The World is on fire and this is what worries you? Bloody hell.

Classic.

TequilaNights · 18/06/2025 08:07

Oh jeez this place!!

You are allowed to have feelings about things going on in your life rather than worrying about things we have no control over.

As others have said, no need to be accusatory, just a, oh I went to comment but I wasn't able to..

LemonLimeOrangeKiwi · 18/06/2025 08:07

Serpentstooth · 18/06/2025 07:50

The World is on fire and this is what worries you? Bloody hell.

How incredibly dismissive. People come here for advice on everything from the trivial to serious.

Who are you to judge what people can be bothered about?!

AutumnLover1989 · 18/06/2025 08:05

OhCalmTheFuckDownMargaret · 18/06/2025 07:55

I think their point was that in the greater scheme of things there are probably far larger things to worry about in the world right now. Like the prospect of being dragged into world war three and the odd one or two long range weapons slowly being aimed in the rough direction of the UK right now. But hey, your picture on Facebook....

Show quote history

But THIS is the OP's world right now and if it's worrying her,it's only right she speaks about it 🙄

BilderbergPoop · 18/06/2025 08:04

Is it because the profile picture is “public” and the others on his profile aren’t? Quickest way to find out is just to ask him.

That said, I’m not sure I’d care.

KrisAkabusi · 18/06/2025 08:02

mushkaa · 18/06/2025 07:58

@OhCalmTheFuckDownMargaretYes there are some terrible things going on in the world right now but I didn’t realise that meant I wasn’t allowed to worry about anything else!

But why are you worried? How could there possibly be a negative to him changing his picture to one of both of you? People's comments about you worrying about this is because it's such a non-event.

ComtesseDeSpair · 18/06/2025 08:01

What concerns you about it? My first thought would be that he knows Uncle Jim might make an inappropriate remark, or that he’ll end up with several dozen “congratulations!” type comments from acquaintances who didn't know he had a girlfriend, or every single one of his aunts will end up commenting “so when’s the wedding??” It just all gets a bit tedious.

Original poster
mushkaa · 18/06/2025 07:58

@OhCalmTheFuckDownMargaretYes there are some terrible things going on in the world right now but I didn’t realise that meant I wasn’t allowed to worry about anything else!

OP posts:
Swipe left for the next trending thread