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Original poster

To leave kids in bed whilst I run

239 replies

Wanttodobetter · 18/06/2025 07:24

I’m a single parent to 4 children, youngest 8 and eldest 14. I want to run for 30 mins locally early morning whilst they’re still asleep. 2 have phones and I’ll leave a number of a neighbour. That’s fine right?!

OP posts:
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Revisionispointless · 19/06/2025 15:40

Wanttodobetter · 19/06/2025 06:51

I went for my jog this morning, back by 6am. Kids knew the drill. Nobody had stirred by the time I got back, all still fast asleep (like they are at that time every day). I did laps past the house.

Incidentally, there is no way my 14 year old (or 12 year old) would be able to continue sleeping if my 8 year old needed them to wake them up. She is not the quietest and I don’t for one moment think she would be unable to wake them!

Edited

The only thing I want to add is to please mix up your routine so that no one watching you would be able to predict that you are out in the small hours on a certain day at a certain time or that DC are home alone . I firmly believe that a lot of bad things happen because someone sees an opportunity

Kuretake · 19/06/2025 11:40

Glad you got out! There is no world in which some sort of aerobics workout in your living room is anything like getting outside for a run!

rosemarble · 19/06/2025 11:37

Wanttodobetter · 19/06/2025 11:14

Exactly. Lone parent, working full time, no family support, 4 children. I think I manage my time pretty well thank you very much!

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I only have one at home now and he's 16 so life is a lot easier.

I am also a runner and I absolutely did make it a priority for myself during the years when getting out was darn hard!

Original poster
Wanttodobetter · 19/06/2025 11:16

Mumble12 · 18/06/2025 20:43

Are they? Wake up at 6, get school lunches ready. Get showered and dressed, 7am children get up, get showered and dressed. 7.45 breakfast, 8am leave for school. 9am-5pm work. 5pm collect children and dog. 5.30pm cook dinner, 6.30pm walk dog, 7.30pm homework/bath 8.30pm youngest in bed.

where in that set up allows to go for a run?

prioritising spending waking hours with your children to me is preferable than 30 mins running while they’re sleeping.

Edited
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Your days look similar to mine, chucking in a few after school clubs! I feel the same, I’ve been at work all day / they’ve been at school. Nice to reconnect rather than being going off out again by myself!

OP posts:
Original poster
Wanttodobetter · 19/06/2025 11:14

rosemarble · 18/06/2025 20:47

Yeah….lone parent, full time job. Raising 2 boys alone. I’d like to have that discussion with you in person.
My sons are independent, confident and mature (mostly!). As such I’ve been able to pursue my own interests when they reached a certain age.

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Exactly. Lone parent, working full time, no family support, 4 children. I think I manage my time pretty well thank you very much!

OP posts:
Cherrytree86 · 19/06/2025 07:17

Wanttodobetter · 19/06/2025 06:51

I went for my jog this morning, back by 6am. Kids knew the drill. Nobody had stirred by the time I got back, all still fast asleep (like they are at that time every day). I did laps past the house.

Incidentally, there is no way my 14 year old (or 12 year old) would be able to continue sleeping if my 8 year old needed them to wake them up. She is not the quietest and I don’t for one moment think she would be unable to wake them!

Edited

Good for you, OP! 💪 🏃

Original poster
Wanttodobetter · 19/06/2025 06:51

I went for my jog this morning, back by 6am. Kids knew the drill. Nobody had stirred by the time I got back, all still fast asleep (like they are at that time every day). I did laps past the house.

Incidentally, there is no way my 14 year old (or 12 year old) would be able to continue sleeping if my 8 year old needed them to wake them up. She is not the quietest and I don’t for one moment think she would be unable to wake them!

OP posts:
Freedbagforlife · 18/06/2025 20:51

I would think they’re safer asleep than you going out when they’re awake. Yes there are risks but there are risks with everything. Hundreds of people die each year falling down stairs so please don’t use stairs when your children are asleep! You know your children and how they react and what they do when they wake up.

rosemarble · 18/06/2025 20:47

Gloriia · 18/06/2025 20:38

Well, equally if the only time you can go for a jog is when your kids are tucked up in bed without an adult around then your time management, organisational and prioritising skills are v questionable.

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Yeah….lone parent, full time job. Raising 2 boys alone. I’d like to have that discussion with you in person.
My sons are independent, confident and mature (mostly!). As such I’ve been able to pursue my own interests when they reached a certain age.

Mumble12 · 18/06/2025 20:43

Gloriia · 18/06/2025 20:38

Well, equally if the only time you can go for a jog is when your kids are tucked up in bed without an adult around then your time management, organisational and prioritising skills are v questionable.

Show quote history

Are they? Wake up at 6, get school lunches ready. Get showered and dressed, 7am children get up, get showered and dressed. 7.45 breakfast, 8am leave for school. 9am-5pm work. 5pm collect children and dog. 5.30pm cook dinner, 6.30pm walk dog, 7.30pm homework/bath 8.30pm youngest in bed.

where in that set up allows to go for a run?

prioritising spending waking hours with your children to me is preferable than 30 mins running while they’re sleeping.

Gloriia · 18/06/2025 20:38

TheSwarm · 18/06/2025 20:32

If you've raised a 14 year old who can't look after younger siblings for 30 minutes when their mum is at most, 15 minutes away with a phone then you've done a shit job, frankly.

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Well, equally if the only time you can go for a jog is when your kids are tucked up in bed without an adult around then your time management, organisational and prioritising skills are v questionable.

TheSwarm · 18/06/2025 20:32

Gloriia · 18/06/2025 17:12

Yes i do? This thread however is about whether a sleeping 14yr old should be responsible for their younger siblings whilst the parent goes out. Such lax ideas when it comes to parenting on here.

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If you've raised a 14 year old who can't look after younger siblings for 30 minutes when their mum is at most, 15 minutes away with a phone then you've done a shit job, frankly.

Hallywally · 18/06/2025 20:28

Personally I think 14 is too young to be responsible for three younger siblings. How long do you go for & how often?

Objectrelations · 18/06/2025 20:03

Seems ok to me

Hubblebubble · 18/06/2025 20:01

If the kids ride, they could go out on their bikes and you could run along to keep up with them

Hubblebubble · 18/06/2025 20:00

And charity family fun runs

Hubblebubble · 18/06/2025 20:00

You can do adult parkrun with kids, they just don't get their times recorded

Cherrytree86 · 18/06/2025 19:40

Mumble12 · 18/06/2025 19:32

But you’re ok with her going when they’re awake and noones supervising them?

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I know!
this makes no sense @Gloriia

K0OLA1D · 18/06/2025 19:40

Gloriia · 18/06/2025 17:12

Yes i do? This thread however is about whether a sleeping 14yr old should be responsible for their younger siblings whilst the parent goes out. Such lax ideas when it comes to parenting on here.

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I leave mine asleep when we go to work. So lax. I'll ask my boss if I can bring them with.

Mumble12 · 18/06/2025 19:32

Gloriia · 18/06/2025 16:14

I could not give a rat's ass what she gives them for breakfast.

I just don't think she should leave kids sleeping and go out, for whatever reason. Parenting involves managing your time and organising things as well as supervising your kids. At the very least be in the house when they are bed.

I'm flabbergasted that these very simple things need pointing out.

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But you’re ok with her going when they’re awake and noones supervising them?

MyLov · 18/06/2025 17:42

Gloriia · 18/06/2025 16:39

No, there is no need for parents to take turns to stay awake Confused

A sleeping 14yr old should not be responsible for their younger siblings while the parent goes out for a jog. Have you ever tried to wake a teen?!

I'd love to read the replies here if the sexes were reversed. 'I'm at work, dh at home with 4 kids and he's left them alone in bed asleep while he goes to the gym'. There'd be a clamour of posters shouting 'LTB NOW!'

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There’s no difference between a sleeping 14 year old and a sleeping 40 year old. But tbh that’s a red herring anyway as most 8 year olds should be old enough to be left for 30 mins anyhow.

MyLov · 18/06/2025 17:39

Horserider5678 · 18/06/2025 08:06

Are you mad! What happens if there was a fire, your children would most likely not survive! A family friend’s house caught fire at the weekend, the fire brigade said if they had been asleep they’d all have most likely died! Do you run when they are awake! Anyone who tells you it’s ok is truly deluded.

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I’m sure the Op has smoke alarms. And has run through what to do with the children if they go off. I did this with my DS from when he was about 5. As you can’t always get to them when there’s a fire and you don’t want them doing something like hiding in a wardrobe or opening their door when there’s fire on the other side. Teach your children what to do in emergency situations then you have both taught them a life skill and you then don’t need to be overprotective.

BeardOToots · 18/06/2025 17:28

merrymelody · 18/06/2025 07:39

It depends on where you live, really.

Where could OP possibly live where this wouldn’t be fine? I guess a hostel?

rosemarble · 18/06/2025 17:18

...and not all teenagers are completely dead to the world until mid afternoon. Neither of mine did that, they've always got up in the morning.

rosemarble · 18/06/2025 17:17

Gloriia · 18/06/2025 16:39

No, there is no need for parents to take turns to stay awake Confused

A sleeping 14yr old should not be responsible for their younger siblings while the parent goes out for a jog. Have you ever tried to wake a teen?!

I'd love to read the replies here if the sexes were reversed. 'I'm at work, dh at home with 4 kids and he's left them alone in bed asleep while he goes to the gym'. There'd be a clamour of posters shouting 'LTB NOW!'

Show quote history

OP, isn't just leaving them so if they wake they'll wonder where she is.

She is telling them the night before that she's getting up early to go for a run.
If the 8 yo wakes before Mum is back and while the 14 yo is still asleep then I'm sure they're old enough to entertain themselves for a bit, or wake the 14 yo.

I'm sure if OP goes for her 1/2 hr run and comes back to find the younger ones aren't comfortable with it, or the 14 yo realises they don't want to mind their younger siblings (though I'd argue that to help their Mum out, this could be regarded as just being part of a family where we all do things for each other), then she'll have a rethink.