To find days off with my kids almost unbearable?

So no one is allowed to struggle unless they have poor sleepers? You can have good sleepers and still find some other things difficult.

You were lucky to have a long sleeper, what are you complaining about? 😂
You are the one moaning about having children when you only have them a couple of days a week, and they sleep a lot.

Honestly, this is a wind up surely?

Dear heavens. I never use the expression sickly sweet but this one is absolutely it. Spoken as the parent of a now 9 and 5 year old

I remember feeling exactly the same @saynn - my dd1 was carried around an Italian beauty spot screaming by my dh and had to go around alone..:but you know, it’s the only time I ever got to go there.

my point is, I get it, something will go wrong, but if the Zog thing is really important, make the effort, take photos and eventually you may forget about the screaming.

my dd loved room on the broom…

This seems to be a common problem with parents who work part time.

You’re not with the kids long enough to get into a routine and because you work you need to use those off days to do chores.

I honestly think the solution (if you can afford it) is to be a SAHP for a while. In many ways it’s easier because you get into a groove, you all get used to each other and your expectations of what you get done in a day are lower.

Obviously not financially viable for some.

I haven't read all the replies, but YANBU.

Two together is Such. Hard. Work. It is for me, anyway. I think it probably depends on the children and their ages. But try not to let people get to you if they're being dismissive about it. They've probably forgotten or they had easygoing kids.

What's the age gap? There are 3.5 years between my two. But DC1 was born in March, DC2 born in September, so DC1 started school aged 4.5 when DC2 turned 1. DC2's first year wasn't too bad because DC1 was at nursery 3 days a week and the days with both of them were somehow manageable, I can't remember how or why, but DC2 was a relatively easy baby. However, as she got older it was definitely harder work to manage them both and now we struggle a lot during the school holidays when they're both with us. They are 8 and 4 now. DC2 is due to start school in September like your oldest. I'm finding this period with DC2 very difficult tbh because she is so ready for school. She will be nearly 5 when she starts. As you say, she's outgrown most of the toddler/preschool groups now. Luckily there is one we go to that's ok and there are some other 4yos there (also due to start school).

Hang on in there. It will get easier, I promise, though that doesn't help you now, it should give you some hope!

I hate being at home by myself with both kids…. They’re at school and I work f/t then DH is usually home with us, thank goodness!

individually I love time with them, all 4 of us is fine. But me and kids? Bloody awful 😭

down to vastly different needs and absolutely relentless bickering. Insufferable!

I feel your pain, it’s not always enjoyable.

Oh my dd1 was a dream - Gina ford clearly wrote her routine for my dd. 12 hours at night, two hour naps, dd2 was a shock, she’s never slept more than a 9 hour stretch and that was when she had a virus…

they usually have a nap where you can recharge for an hour or two, they have a lovely early bedtime so you get the evening.

😂😂

that's being VERY lucky.

I don't know many kids who sleep an hour! Early bed time tends to mean early mornings, so it's not the ideal for everybody.

and only when women dislike the stages.

Men get a free pass if they dislike the baby stage, for example.

I am sorry, but a child who needs to go out, park or somewhere every day.. thats' normal?

You wouldn't have a dog without planning on letting them run a good hour every day, more depending on the breed, who on earth would think children would need less exercise? If they don't go to sport clubs, yes you take them out? That cannot have come as a surprise?

I honestly do not understand people.

I didn't mean garden, I mean outside for walks and let them run steam!

I can't imagine families stuck in flats in countries where they were not allowed to go out, or had a 1 hour limit or all the various restrictions.

I was in England and I was lucky! It was bad enough then.

How can you possibly predict that you will find a particular age range hard work, though? Til you've lived it, would you have KNOWN that your child would hate the pram? Or that one might be incredibly active whilst the other would rather read a book and you need to take the active one out but the reader doesn't want to?

None of this is an exact science. Stop being smug and condescending.

We don't have a garden. Imagine a three year old stuck indoors with that much energy that I was suspecting ADHD. It was horrendous.

Oh you're right, we should all be changing our house or doing construction work to make our homes more appropriate for each childhood stage.

Some of us live where we can afford. I can't see the living room from the kitchen. I can hear it, but can't see it. I'd have to knock down load bearing and external walls to make it open plan. It'd cost a fortune, which we don't have, and isn't necessarily what we'd want long term or what would be the best thing for our resale price.

I currently have a three year old with a speech delay with massive tantrums and the safety awareness of a toddler just starting to walk. We can't really go to groups because he would rather spend his time playing with the taps in the toilets. There is possible autism. How is that enjoyable? I also have a older child who had so much energy she had to go to the park every day even when it was snow on the ground. The summer before she started school was awful. Not sure why we should enjoy that?

Oh bore off.

Those are more obvious.

I had no idea I'd hate the newborn stage
I had no idea that I'd have twins
I had no idea that I'd find so much of it to be mind numbing

etc

It's different for everyone and I think it's ridiculous to suggest that everyone knows exactly what it's like to have DC before having them.

I wasn't slagging off the OP, I was literally replying to your sentence

Some of us don't have high quality crystal balls.
by saying you don't need a crystal ball to know the obvious!

Weekends and holidays being one of the obvious.