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Original poster

To think it's OK to carry my toddler while pregnant

90 replies

gollyimholly · 17/06/2025 02:35

AIBU to think it's ok to carry my toddler whilst pregnant?

I'm just 3 months pregnant and I have been told off one too many times for carrying my 2 year old. Today it was in a cafe by total stranger who heard me say I was expecting to the barista.

My 2 year old is about 19kg so definitely not the lightest and I struggle to carry her for a long period of time but I can manage about 5mins before it gets too much of a struggle.

I just googled the dangers and it says things like: back pain, increased risk of falls and balance issues. But today's lady in the cafe said it could result in a prolapse, my mum said it could result in a miscarriage...

OP posts:
RobinHeartella · 17/06/2025 06:34

I think that must be a typo because my dd is turning 5 and she's not yet 19kg. She's slightly above average weight for her age.

I'd say, if your toddler really is that big, then yes I'd be cautious of carrying her too much as you could get pelvic problems

NoraLuka · 17/06/2025 06:31

I carried DD1 around when I was pregnant with DD2 and was ok, although did give birth about 4 weeks early - nobody ever said it was related but I think it might have been triggered by leaning over to put DD1 in her car seat. I can’t remember how much DD1 weighed but she was 15 months when DD2 was born so definitely a lot less than 19 kg.

It’s probably a good idea to encourage more walking gradually from now so you don’t have to carry her as much in later pregnancy.

RosesAndHellebores · 17/06/2025 06:30

I lifted and carried throughout pregnancy. And walked and drove, gardened, etc. None of those things destabilises pregnancy and none of them cause prolapse. (A very big baby/poorly managed labour might).

Why would you tell a barrista you are pregnant at all?

Why is your child 19kg at 2?

Why listen to a mother who talks utter nonsense?

Hercisback1 · 17/06/2025 06:16

19kg is one hefty 2yo, have you had her seen by a doctor?

Later on it becomes really uncomfortable to carry them, but now it's fine.

Moonnstars · 17/06/2025 06:14

Yes I don't see a problem other than the weight of your toddler. My first child didn't walk til my second was born so I had to carry them when pregnant as there was no other option (I mean picking them up, carrying around the house, obviously I used a pushchair when out). He definitely wasn't that heavy though.

CommissarySushi · 17/06/2025 05:29

I would be very careful and try to encourage more walking. 19kg is a lot. Absolutely do not pick them up for at least a few weeks after birth, so it would definitely be a good idea to get them used to walking more.

Overthebow · 17/06/2025 04:18

Usually yes, but your / year old is a lot heavier than most 2 year olds so I’m not sure. My dd was 3 when I was pregnant with my second DC but she was only about 14kg then and I still struggled with that. I’d check with your GP.

caringcarer · 17/06/2025 04:16

19kg is heavy for a 2 year old and throughout your pregnancy your 2 year old may get heavier. I'd encourage they to be walking and holding your hand. Still fine to have them sit on your lap etc but I don't think walking around carrying 19kg can be doing you any good.

WorriedMamma2 · 17/06/2025 04:04

I was dancing around with my 3 year old in my arms when I was a lot further along than that and carried him throughout my pregnancy. You'll be fine and so will baby!

littleweedandherflowers · 17/06/2025 03:49

Carried mine until the day dd was born ! Absolutely fine xx

ButterBites · 17/06/2025 03:46

Nothing wrong with it at all, as long as you can manage it!

My son was 2 and circa 13kg when I carried him when pregnant so a lot lighter, but I’m sure carrying him and regularly being on the floor with him helped keep me fit in my second pregnancy and made my second pregnancy much more comfortable overall compared to my first!

EconomyClassRockstar · 17/06/2025 03:25

Well who else is going to carry them? Of course it's ok! But maybe, also encourage them to walk as much as possible before the baby is born so that walking is the norm.

Bobbie12345678 · 17/06/2025 03:12

It is fine. But.. your toddler is very heavy for her age. The 95th centile for a three year old is only about 17-18kg. You should maybe see her doctor.

TheatreTraveller · 17/06/2025 03:00

Of course it's absolutely fine.

Eenameenadeeka · 17/06/2025 02:52

Of course it's okay. Your toddler doesn't stop needing you just because you are pregnant, and your body is used to carrying them.

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