to wonder why parents don’t monitor children’s internet access?

Parents think that by disabling the chat function it makes Roblox safe. The games are completely unsuitable and age ratings don’t work. These are user created games where people can make games like ‘rapper with one p’, beating up pregnant women and ‘stroke the cucumber’.

Yes, teach internet safety, being safe means keeping children away from dangerous sites.

hindenburgresearch.com/roblox/

Some Possibilities :
They don’t care
They don’t know how to apply restrictions
They don’t think that their child is up to no good
they think that everybody else is online and they have FOMO

You mention that some of her friends have Snapchat. They use Snapchat because messages disappear so parents can’t see what is posted. Other apps like WhatsApp have disappearing messages which is good for people who want to bully, sext and get up to illegal stuff.

The cold hard truth is the only person whose behaviour you can influence is your dd. People are saying get rid of the phone because 9 is so young for this kind of drama and she could be facing this for years if they go to the same secondary. In an ideal world the parents will act but don’t be surprised if they say that they can’t control their DD’s actions and say that your dd is being unkind not taking the ASD into account. That’s not my opinion but DARVO is rife when you complain about another child and school is limited in what they can do.

It is very different but not in terms of the level of predators.
You can allow children experience the same things as their peers while protecting them too.
Far more accessibility to children in the 80's for vulnerable children.

Every MNer's child is well behaved, and is only using their smartphones to download books and educational Apps.

If you multiply this case with all the others schools get landed with - and remember that before smartphones were being presented to children of an increasingly young age, schools did not have this issue to deal with on top of everything else - you might reflect that it's NOT a great idea to give your child a smartphone at all.

Respectfully, it's very different from the 80s. And I don't believe children 'throw caution to the wind'. They're children. They're gullible and naïve.
You can also teach children about sea life without giving money to big tech.

Yes, you teach your DC not to interact with strangers, don't share personal information, roblox is shit hot at removing chat from the games room, if you mention phone number or ask personal questions, immediately deleted.
There has always been pedophiles lurking, no different from the 80's, stranger danger, there is no puppies or sweets in the car, you'll always have children who throw caution to the wind or are vulnerable. Most understand stranger danger.
My DS 10 has 13 friends, a mix of cousins and school friends.
It can be educational too, my DS knows everything the sea and every form of sea life.

www.bloomberg.com/features/2024-roblox-pedophile-problem/

Agree with this, Roblox is not safe. No matter how many parents on here think it is, it is not. No one should be on it.

Of course all parents should monitor what their child looks at. Also, parents shouldn’t allow a 9 year old to have a phone with internet access. If she needs something to contact you, get her a brick phone.

She not only has a phone but plays Roblox?! Oh man.

🙄🙄🙄

the OP is beng smug about her superior parenting. The fact is. If she hadn't allowed her NINE year old to have a smart phone she wouldn't be in this position would she.

its not brushing the issue under the carpet. 🙄🙄

I'm talking about other parents up the school gates seeing as that's what the op is about.

Yes many on mumsnet are on the ball about this stuff sometimes to an extreme extent (my eldest is 9 so no experience with teens yet but I've seen people on here saying no phones till 18)

But yes the older parents ar my child's school typically give their young kids iPads and don't seem to realise what they could be doing on there never mind that it's just not good for their health mental and physical to stare at that iPad for hours a day from age 2

You're the only one who seems to have an issue with your age.

Your parents not knowing something doesn't equate to every parent not knowing things.

Many of us probably know more than you do.

New report reveals 7 in 10 children experience harm online, but most don’t report it

https://www.internetmatters.org/hub/press-release/new-report-reveals-7-in-10-children-experience-harm-online-but-most-dont-report-it/

Why do parents give phones to 9yr old little children monitored or not!

I thought most people at least waited until high school?
Hopefully they’re banned by the time my dc gets older!

Self policing might work with more responsible older kids who have earned some trust, but 9 year olds just don't have the maturity. As this thread proves. There is just no need for a child that age to have any unsupervised screen time. You might be able to check what sites they were on, but you can't go back and check exactly what they were doing, or watching, or who they were speaking to...

@ButteredRadishes if they are using phone data, link the two contracts to yours, then within the admin setting you will still be able to see - there are various settings (depending upon phone) to state that you won't use mobile data to access certain apps. In general phone data is way slower than your home wifi, but there are always alternatives.

As I've constantly said, children will always find ways around what parents say, I could be completely wrong with how I brought my two up, but I put the responsibility on them, you can use it, but.........

I agree, as a secondary school teacher it concerns me that parents allow their children to go on their phones so much. We have so many issues with bullying via Snapchat, and when you contact the parents they’re clueless on how to deal with it. I think it’s so scary that parents don’t know what their children are watching on TikTok or YouTube

kids came back after the half term and they were telling me how their screen time was 10 hours a day!!! I just think that’s an insane amount for a 12/13 year old to be on their phone.

How does that work when they're using phone data... ?

Well, a lot of the 15-21 year olds I know vape.... doesn't mean it's right.

a brick phone would have been fine...

Well obviously, that's why I said she should tell the school.... then she should take measures to protect her own child from this, or any other online issues.

If it is happening within the environment the OP's child is in, then it is their responsibility to inform the school, and other friends etc.., Obviously sensibly, we've all had the chat from our parents about child x at school, who was just a wrong un, and you are to, under no circumstance, to play with them or walk home from school with them.

A school/office/Church etc.., are places where all sorts of people interact with and attend, it is our duty as an active member of society to point out issues which we see as potentially affecting someone else within that community.

It is our responsibility to point out obvious bad behaviour to the correct authority, would you not report/call the police if you witnessed a car crash? Or a mugging? If we all go around, in our own little protected bubbles, we loose what is left of society.

If we don't then it's Animal Farm.

Well yeah, that's how it works. A parents responsibility is first and foremost to their own DC. OP should report to the school and take action to protect her own child. What happens in other households isn't her responsibility.