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AIBU?

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Original poster

To not send my children to school because I need to fly ?

254 replies

Paticake · 15/06/2025 17:06

I have to fly tonight and my kids have been left with my mum, she lives two hours away. Is it ok that they don’t go to school or am I a terrible parent for picking work over the kids?

OP posts:
Kokolemon · 15/06/2025 19:11

ExercicenformedeZ · 15/06/2025 18:44

YABU. School comes first.

How about eating and paying the bills?

Kokolemon · 15/06/2025 19:09

Honestly OP this is fine.

Women get crucified on here for not having a job. But sometimes jobs have conditions - this is one of them. The kids will not come to any harm by missing a bit of school, unless their attendance is already hitting trigger point.

Azandme · 15/06/2025 19:08

showyourquality · 15/06/2025 19:04

Honestly dc took years out of school for Covid not that long ago.
A couple of days are not going to make any difference.

Yea, and for many the impact was gargantuan, and still shows in classrooms today.

GloryDias · 15/06/2025 19:05

I work in attendance at a primary school, I would phone/email the school in the morning and explain due to family illness you have had to go abroad unexpectedley and the children will be absent for x number of days due to them staying with your mum. It will either be authorised or unauthorised and unless school have on going attendance concern that should be the end of it.

showyourquality · 15/06/2025 19:04

Honestly dc took years out of school for Covid not that long ago.
A couple of days are not going to make any difference.

Zanatdy · 15/06/2025 19:03

I wouldn’t think twice. Its a one off and an emergency. My DD was unwell in year 9 and attendance was 70% and she left year 11 with all top grades. A few days here and there won’t hurt. When you don’t have family nearby, there’s not a lot you can do.

namechangeGOT · 15/06/2025 19:02

ButteredRadishes · 15/06/2025 18:51

Surely your mother is staying at yours, what with looking after 2 kids that need to school and her living 2 hours away?

Or perhaps all the PPs saying this have could get their brains in gear and understand that perhaps OPs mother might have other responsibilities too so she can’t stay at her daughters?

Kokolemon · 15/06/2025 19:00

monkeysox · 15/06/2025 17:12

Why can't she come to yours

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Maybe she has to work?

namechangeGOT · 15/06/2025 19:00

Ilikeadrink14 · 15/06/2025 18:51

Yes, ok! Let’s just forget that it’s illegal, Not to mention not good for the children!
Perhaps when your child does badly in exams you might remember this.
I think you need to take a good look at your lifestyle.

Show quote history

If a child did badly in exams after missing a couple of days off school then they were going to do badly in their exams anyway!

ilovesooty · 15/06/2025 18:54

What a load of sanctimonious hand wringing and fussing. It sounds like a one off, unforeseen emergency. Of course if they'll be off for several days that would be different, but I don't see what the OP is supposed to do differently at short notice.

Ilikeadrink14 · 15/06/2025 18:54

ThatLilacTiger · 15/06/2025 18:43

It's just school, don't sweat it unless they're in an exam year.

It’s no wonder kids have such a relaxed attitude to attending school. If you think it’s ok to miss it, then I think you are setting yourself up for trouble later.

Ilikeadrink14 · 15/06/2025 18:51

Menopausalmum43 · 15/06/2025 17:16

The world will not end if your kid doesn't go to school for a few days. Do what you need to do.

Yes, ok! Let’s just forget that it’s illegal, Not to mention not good for the children!
Perhaps when your child does badly in exams you might remember this.
I think you need to take a good look at your lifestyle.

ButteredRadishes · 15/06/2025 18:51

Surely your mother is staying at yours, what with looking after 2 kids that need to school and her living 2 hours away?

RockyRogue1001 · 15/06/2025 18:49

In the school where I work, if it's just for the day and you call the school to explain, it's likely to be an authorised absence (code C)

Anything much longer and the school would want a holiday form filled out and most likely you'd get an unauthorised code - a G or an O.

MassiveOvaryaction · 15/06/2025 18:49

Funnyduck60 · 15/06/2025 18:45

Why can't their father help?

Because as op has posted the other parent is unwell..

In case you're not aware, bottom right of op you can click 'see all' to get all of op's posts.

stichguru · 15/06/2025 18:48

Assuming that

  • the sick other parents actually isn't well enough to look after the kids
  • the work trip was planned before you knew that the other parent would be sick
  • there is a good reason why the grandparent can't travel to the kids
  • it won't be for more than a few days

it's fine! These things happen. You can't cancel a work trip at very short notice without inconveniencing lots of other people and the sick parent really couldn't cope. If parent is long term sick and this was your future plan for the kids for this week, then no you should have planned for grandparents of someone else to look after the kids at your house, or planned not to go on the work trip.

Funnyduck60 · 15/06/2025 18:45

Why can't their father help?

Enrichetta · 15/06/2025 18:44

neverbeenskiing · 15/06/2025 18:39

Where does OP say it's just for one day? Have I missed something?

If she's flying somewhere for work seems unlikely she'll be there and back in one day.

Show quote history

She is flying tonight, presumably for a meeting tomorrow. If it’s in Europe, there is no reason why she can’t fly back tomorrow.

ExercicenformedeZ · 15/06/2025 18:44

YABU. School comes first.

Cosycover · 15/06/2025 18:43

Now sick is sick?

ThatLilacTiger · 15/06/2025 18:43

It's just school, don't sweat it unless they're in an exam year.

butterpuffed · 15/06/2025 18:43

ninjahamster · 15/06/2025 18:07

Depends how long for? Are you coming back to give more detail? Why didn’t your mum come to your house?

OP has said it's a 4 hour round trip to her mum's and then has to get a plane .

AirborneElephant · 15/06/2025 18:41

i would have done the same 🤷‍♀️. How Ill is the other parent through? In hospital, you’ve all done the best you can. Has a cold, they are pathetic and it’s entirely their fault the children are not at school.

neverbeenskiing · 15/06/2025 18:39

DolphinsAreEvil · 15/06/2025 18:08

It’s one day, if they have a good attendance record then just phone in sick.

Where does OP say it's just for one day? Have I missed something?

If she's flying somewhere for work seems unlikely she'll be there and back in one day.

Tartanboots · 15/06/2025 18:36

Your partner sounds a bit flaky? Does he(?) need looking after too if he's so ill he's unable to look after kids? If he's that ill do you need to stay to look after him, as well as take kids to school? It sounds like going away at this time isn't going to work, you need proper local childcare.

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