Am I controlling for asking for these boundaries after birth

Bless you. Yanbu.
It's understandable you are worried about this. I'm sure it'll be fine but having a plan is a good idea.

Completely reasonable op. Especially point 1.

This is great advice and by keeping the discussion quite general, you don't open yourself up to being challenged and needing to justify decisions. If you say now, no visits for the first week, you'll possibly have people saying that's too long, can we come day 3 or 4 or saying you said 7 days when you might not be ready when the time comes. Or, like on this thread, maybe dad can just bring baby to us then? It's perfectly fair to say we'll let you know what we need and when we're ready for visits then you can play it by ear. You never know, you might be feeling great and desperate to show off baby or you might need longer.

I had a difficult postpartum for various reasons and "we'll let you know when/what...." is a really helpful tool to kindly set some boundaries and give yourself some space until you're ready.

I think the photo issue is easy to manage as presumably your dh is the only person taking photos and requesting they are sent to other people only after you have seen the baby is completely reasonable.
re visits I would follow the wait and see approach that a pp mentioned.ie we would love to see you, but I the delivery is high risk and we will keep you updated.
i had an emergency section under ga and did not want any visitors. Fortunately we were living overseas at the time and nobody was able to drop by the hospital.

Perfectly fine, I hope all goes well.

I was anticipating voting YABU, as so many poster set ridiculous boundaries around childbirth - as though their child is the second coming - but given the circumstances you're not being unreasonable at all. Good luck for your cSection

Likewise, I read some ridiculous boundaries on here, like, immediate family not allowed to feed the baby, hold the baby, change their nappy. Nobody to visit in the first month. And that means nobody. I mean, everybody's read these totally unreasonable posts.

Your boundaries sound absolutely normal to me. I would certainly be gutted if loads of people saw my baby before I did. I had a c-section under general anaesthesia and am still a bit miffed that dh held her before I did. She's 38 now.
You are totally justified OP.

Sounds like my third. I also banned visitors as I really did not want anyone seeing me having blood transfusions, possibly in ICU and looking and feeling like death. in fact I was not even sure I would survive and just hoped my son might. The theatre was extra full with NNICU team, surgical team and heamotolgy team with a blood bikes runner on standby to fetch extra blood outside the theatre.
I did ask for my DH to see and hold son if he did not need to go straight to NNICU. I did not see him for seven hours as I kept zonking out after the GA as the CSec took longer than expected. DH took photos for me.
The only visitor I allowed in the first 24 hours was my MIL because she was on a visit from the states and was flying back the next day and we would not see her for another year. Everyone else except immediate family who I knew would help we’re kept away by DH as I really needed the recovery time.
It took a further two weeks after before I felt I could do some things for myself and six weeks to be able to lift my son on my own ( more complex csec than you have for a simple safe delivery plus drugs from haematologist knocking me for six).

I truly hope all goes well for you and that any PPH can be managed safely and that you do not need lots of blood units. may your much wanted baby arrive safe and well enough not to need NNICU and may you see much wanted baby as soon as you can keep your eyes open post GA.

(PS take any offered extra pain relief meds if your looking at a more complex csec and any drugs the haematologist recommends to avoid severe PPHs)

If OP is breastfeeding, she won't want her DH taking her baby down the pub. If OP is poorly after the birth, he should be by her side, helping her care for the baby.

That sounds perfectly reasonable, good look with the GA, they can be stressful.

OP has said that she might be very ill afterwards (she has a bleeding disorder) and may need a blood transfusion and/or a hysterectomy. In that case, she would be reasonable to put off visitors for a while until she feels well enough.

Those sounds absolutely fine. Anyone with a decent bone in their body should totally respect these boundaries! Personally I never rock up and visit anyone with a new baby until they say they would like a visit and when I do I try to be helpful and not a burden !

If OP's husband is sending photos of the baby to people before his wife has even seen the baby, he would be unkind and unreasonable.

I had no visitors at the hospital I just wanted it to be me and my husband, I also had no visitors for the first week after I came home, I was very sick and need time to recover. People were none stop texting and calling me though so next time I won't even tell anyone when I've given birth until I'm ready.

Having a baby is likely to be one of the most vulnerable experiences of your life. It’s therefore very reasonable to have some boundaries around that. Of course you don’t want anyone to see your precious baby before you do. You’ll likely find though that you’re keen for people to visit but it’s always good to manage expectations in case you are not.

Your boundaries sound perfectly reasonable

Sounds reasonable and I'm also someone who often thinks people ABU with their new baby boundaries!

Re: photos, when you discuss it with your husband, maybe make it clear whether you don't want him to take any pictures or just not share them? I had an EMCS and didn't see my baby for an hour or so but I really like looking at the pics my husband took straight after birth - baby was all cleaned up an hour later so I didn't see the "completely fresh" version :) He might not naturally take any pics if he isn't intending to directly send them to someone.

This is all very normal!

They sound absolutely fine to me op

stick to them xx

I think you’re being completely reasonable. The photo thing especially - I can completely understand that. Yours is not a typical birth situation and you don’t know yet how things will go. Hopefully everything will go smoothly and recovery will be great, and you may well feel absolutely fine and change your mind about some things. But setting boundaries from the beginning isn’t a bad idea. I hope everything goes well.

Maybe OP could get a private room? More control then.

thankfully not everywhere.

You have mothers complaining that they are not comfortable if someone else' s partner is around, you can't have completely random visitors allowed.

what do you mean, umm no.

It's not up to YOU, mind giving the actual mum a choice on what she feels more comfortable with 😂

I am saying it's absolutely fine for a mum to feel the way she feels. If she's more comfortable with baby nearby, that's fine. Dad can bond at home. How does a mum on a bed rest manage?

It's not up to the dad to decide alone if he can take the baby away! Treating the mother like an actual human being and letting her in charge of her own baby would be a start.

Those boundaries sound totally fine and reasonable

@GinnyandGeorgia They don’t all visit at once! They do allow parents and DH to visit and then others in the forthcoming days at visiting time. Relatives stick by the rules but can visit.

Lots of mums, particularly breastfeeding mums, want and need to be physically close to their babies after birth. Babies who are BF and newborn do not feed on a schedule and may well want to be cluster feeding constantly, not taken out in the car with Dad. It’s unrealistic to separate a new baby and their mother. Have you never heard of the fourth trimester? All my maternal instincts would have fought this! About four weeks in, DH started to take baby for a walk in the pram while I had a bath, but before that I needed her close to me.