To be furious about inevitable menopause

my brain and professional standing and peaceful relationships will all be taken away from me for no reason

You’re catastrophising. My brain’s still fine, my career continued for nearly 20 years after the menopause as did my marriage. The absolute joy of being on the other side, not giving a fuck about all the things that previously caused me angst and no more mess or fluctuating hormones made me feel like Wonderwoman.

Yes, @Cushionseams, I'm more confident professionally now than I've ever been.

But I know that any bloody moment now the brain fog and anxiety and insomnia and prolapse will come for me and ruin it.

It's so depressing that so many women are being sold the idea that the menopause inevitably brings bad health. It feels like we have been flung into a rerun of male-dominated Victorian medicine , with its view that women and their wandering wombs were just flawed by nature.

Plenty of women just stop having periods and shout 'Yay, liberation from tampons!' without any symptoms at all to speak of.

Stop being furious about ill-health that might well not happen, @Fragmentedbrain. It is no more rational than being furious about future arthritis that you may or may not suffer from.

Ill health during menopause is no-one's destiny. What began as a serious effort to get more acknowledgement and support for the women who do get ill has become an industry, dedicated to selling the weird idea of 'Illness for all'.

I'm 50 . No symptoms yet. You could be feeling angry for years waiting for them!

Thanks @Fragmentedbrain as one child free woman to another you made me laugh- I used to feel that since I wasn't going to have any DC I ought to be let off having periods. Seriously, the menopause wasn't that bad for me, no night sweats or anxiety and I've never used HRT, no prolapse problems either but that's more related to child birth and aging together so you'd be unlucky if that happened to you. Don't spoil your 40s worrying about something that may never happen

The actual menopause was a bit shit, but some years on, I feel on top of the flipping world professionally and emotionally (that hollow dragging anxiety of a younger age is all gone).

Ah, I'm sorry @Fragmentedbrain. I was attempting tongue in cheek there, I wasn't trying to be mean.

If it helps, I've come through the menopause with my intellectual capacity intact. There was a year or two in my 40s when after a particularly challenging day at work I'd barely be able to remember my own name, but like I said, HRT fixed that. I'm still firing on all mental cylinders now in my early 60s, and long may it last.

I was on the progesterone only pill throughout my menopause for contraception. I only really knew I was going through menopause because my periods became irregular and eventually stopped.

I'm 55 now and don't feel that different to when I was younger, maybe I get more tired in the evening and like an early night but that's about it. I have a career and a good marriage, my DS are doing well, can't really complain about life.

You are either going to age, or you're going to die young, the former is probably the better option.

Clearly that can’t be the case and your life must be in a shambles.

As an aside your username made me lol given the current topic 🤣

Not everyone gets these symptoms.

Honestly what a load of petulant nonsense.

Im 51. My professional standing and peaceful relationships haven't gone anywhere.

Loss of oestrogen means loss of youth & ageing. Thank goodness for HRT.

Again why are you jumping to those conclusions?

I’m not sure if being on the pill will make a huge difference if you get symptoms. It is true that some women get very few or very mild symptoms.

But for the majority, the peri menopause will have an impact. So you are wise to think about it now and perhaps start looking at complimentary products (vitamins, collagen etc) to get a head start.

The good news is that we have much more available to us than any other generation of women before us. Both in terms of information and medication.

YANBU to be angry about the prospect. Looking back now, I can see that my mood/feelings of anger were probably one of the first symptoms that things were kicking off. Along with sleep disturbances. I was about 43/44 at the time.

Why are you furious about something that you have no idea how it will affect you or if it will affect you at all?

Maybe stop reading all the articles spouting doom and gloom and see what happens. 🤷‍♀️

I can’t wait for my periods to finally stop completely.

not everyone has negative side effects. I would gladly trade a few more for the cessation of my horrific menstruation. Peri is dragging on forever.

well, its coming for you wether you like it or not! (maybe you will get lucky though and sail through).

I started HRT a few years ago now for insomnia, brain fog and joint pain mostly. I also lost over 7st in weight, started exercising regularly, eating healthy, developed a 'I couldnt give a shit' attitude about the opinions of other people.

Even with some annoying symptoms Im still living my best life right now. It doesnt have to automatically be bad!

YABVU to waste your time being angry in advance about symptoms you may not even get.

I’m delighted to not have periods every month anymore. I have Endometriosis, and trust me, the Menopause has been a cake-walk compared to heavy bleeding, flooding, pain so bad I thought I would pass out.. as well as the horrible effect on my bowel.

HRT … I feel fine

I've had no symptoms at all. No night sweat, no hot flashes, no brain fog. Just the end of periods which was very welcome.