Puppy dilemma - it’s not her, it’s us

Disagree. The allergy issue in ops post comes after the entire family are “meh”. Allergies are a convenient excuse for those who don’t want to take responsibility. And wouldn’t you make sure your children weren’t allergic before getting a dog?
Either way, this dog needs to go back and op needs to never get another animal. I stand by the fact that it is a bad example for her children though.
And actually? “Rescue” dogs very often don’t have the issues that people perceive. All they need is people to give them a chance, but the perception of “rescue” needlessly puts a lot of people off.

Send the puppy back…sooner rather than later.

I fell in love with my male dog the moment I set eyes on him, we have bonded in a way I never expected or anticipated, that dog would literally die for me (and he’s a trained protection dog so should)

My female dog the jury’s still out 🤣 she’s an entire different ball game, and whilst I do love her she’s so much more than I bargained for, and twice as much work, the relationship has been rocky but we have gotten there in the end and still have some off days but she is my husband’s shadow not mine 🤷‍♀️ and a complete and utter different personality to my male.

No 11 week old puppy is trained…but it does deserve to be with people who are more than at but ‘meh’ about it.

And never get another one

Shame on you! “despite her gorgeousness, we are all a little meh”. You sound truly awful. Poor puppy deserves better! Do the decent thing and get her speyed before she is used as a breeding machine.

This.

But don’t get another. She’s a pup it’ll be fine - don’t let her become a two year old dog with issues OP.

Yes! I always, always say to people, only get a dog if you yourself want a dog. If you don't, don't do it.

Your attitude is shocking. Frankly you should never have an animal again!

Give her back to the breeder asap so she can find a family from as young as possible. If you don’t, and you give her up later, you will ruin her life and destroy her trust in people. Dogs don’t forget being abandoned, ever. Be very very careful with the next choice you make. You either commit for life or you give her back now and do not get another pet

It is not reasonable to get a puppy because you are mildly interested. You are finding that this very real puppy is not a toy for the kids.

Having a puppy is hard and often messy WORK! At this age, they need absolute routine and constant consistency in training from ONE leader. If you are not prepared to continue in this fashion you'll end up with an anxious, fussy, or disruptive dog.

If the trainer is happy to take this puppy back, please take it back to them before any more poor training spoils this puppy. Clearly having a puppy is not right for your family at this time, nor in your future unless you get trained to be a trainer!

@Goodlorditssummer one of the main reasons OP is rehoming is because her DD is allergic. OP sounds like she went to a good breeder who is willing to take the animal back and at such a young age the puppy will have no problem finding a home. This is better than the OP trying to stick it out for however many years and the dog being neglected for this time and then passed onto a rescue centre to rehome and fix all the behavioural issues the neglect has caused.
People aren't perfect they make mistakes, shaming them from it means they'll hide those mistakes and things will only be worse for the animal.

@neverwakeasleepingpuppy Not sure why voting is saying YABU
Return the puppy - they’re hard work, puppies suck. I have one- but I love her, I knew it was going to be HELL ON EARTH. I made peace with that, I knew it would be hell and ultimately very worth it for the next 15-20 years I hope.

Let her go.

I definitely believe that a dog is a lifelong commitment. But you have realized very quickly that dog ownership is not for you. It's a bit surprising that you were unaware of this fact earlier when you looked after other people's dogs. But in any case, the best thing for the puppy is to return her to the breeder. She deserves to live with a family that will love her with all their hearts, not people who are at best indifferent.

Agree

@BloodandGlitter Well yes. But responsible pet owners do their research, take advice from other pet owners, spend time with the type of animal they are thinking of getting and have some self awareness too? If you are “mildly pro” about the idea of getting a dog, the sensible thing to do is not get one? This isn’t a toy, it’s a living, sentient being. Fortunately in this scenario, the breeder will take it back, but for many puppies, they are bought on a whim by irresponsible people who haven’t thought it through. They end up being passed from pillar to post then labelled as “rescue” and therefore somehow “deficient” in the eyes of many. Rescues are literally overflowing. That is not a dog problem. It’s a people problem. This dog needs to be given back to the breeder. But, to be honest, it’s not a good example for the children involved. Dogs are not disposable.

Are you prepared to give her up and not know where she might end up. She sounds settled if she's sleeping through the night and you have put a lot of work in already. Also you're at home in the day which is ideal.
Maybe you just need a bit more time to bond, it can be overwhelming at first.

Ive read less riled comments on here when women have slapped toddlers. This place never fails to amaze me.

The dog is fed, warm, comfortable. Hopefully will soon be with a more suitable family. I foster dogs, I hope nobody ever has a pop at me over dogs getting attached to my family and then being rehomed to their (hopeful) forever homes.
Dogs are quite tough, I get a lot of ones who’s owners are too sick or have passed away, never had one that’s been upset for too long and it’s unusual for them to not settle with their new family so hopefully the puppy will be settled with her new family with no issues in no time.

Poor puppy. hope the breeder takes more care with choosing her next family.

I hear there are some absolutely gorgeous pet stones available at garden centres these days, you might want to consider getting one.

I am not sure I can say I immediately loved or adored any of my cats right away, it took some time. That said, they were all adult cats with various issues, not cute fluffy kittens. It sounds like you'd prefer a cat tbh.

I think it's ok to say you made a mistake and give the puppy back. However, love isn't instant. They need time to develop a personality and bond with you. At first it's just relentless pee/poo/feed/chew, just like a newborn.

Secondly, a bit of piriton while your DD gets used to the dog can help.

Thirdly, DD3 has OCD. She has a dog. At first she couldn't even touch dogs. Now they have proper kisses. It can change.

This is a very sensible approach. If you see yourselves as a loving foster family, happy to house train, cuddle (lots of cuddles!) and walk, I’m sure your pup will find a forever home very soon.

I love dogs and my dog is literally our family. You already realised it was a bad decision. You are fortunate the breader will take her back so just do it asap.

The only thing i ask (if i may) is that you dont forget this experience..so in a couple of years you wont be buying another one cause 'it ill be different this time'.

Send the puppy back asap if the kids want a pet get them a fish.

Very sensible. Don’t offer to mind her, just hand her back. The less she’s bonded with you the better.

I think we need to stop shaming people who rehome their pets. Responsible rehoming is the act of a good pet owner. Someone who doesn't care isn't going to spend the time to find a proper home/rescue for their animal and are far more likely to dump it or neglect it.
When we vilify people for giving up their pets the proper way it just encourages people to do it the wrong way so they won't be shamed for their choices.
Sometimes things just don't work out the way we think it will.

Poor puppy. Hand it back to the breeder asap. Do not get another dog.

One would hope that a ‘decent’ family and a decent pet owner would consider all these things before making the decision to invite a puppy into their family.