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To wish i’d known when younger the importance of going into a career with money

356 replies

Watermelonlollies · 14/06/2025 12:34

I don’t remember my parents stressing this to me.

I’m a teacher and used to have an okay lifestyle, got by happily and could have holidays and a few treats here and there.
Life isn’t like that now, as i’m sure it isn’t for many.

I’m not materialistic in any way, but as I’ve got older it’s really dawned on me the importance having money makes and I wish i’d gone down a different path

Does anyone feel the same and do/will any of you be expressing this to your kids?

OP posts:
SendBooksAndTea · 14/06/2025 13:32

RosesAndHellebores · 14/06/2025 13:30

Yes, but they get significant meaningful breaks at regular intervals in a way that other workers/professionals don't. I work about 50/55 hours pw and last had a week off in February due to operational necessity.

If you say so. I don't think anyone who hasn't worked in a school can comprehend how stressful it can be and the amount of work there is. It takes over your life.

Pottedpalm · 14/06/2025 13:32

Ficklebricks · 14/06/2025 12:48

Teaching used to be a very well paid profession. My sister graduated in the 90s/early 00s and she got a government grant to do the teaching course, all paid for with no debt. She then pursued every promotion she could for extra money (I'm not exactly sure of her role but she ended up head of department or a senior leader I think?)

Her pension is excellent compared to mine. I think you are being unreasonable to say teaching isn't well paid. Are teachers paid enough for what they do? Absolutely not, but then most of us aren't in nearly all sectors. But teaching is much more financially beneficial than shop work, cleaning or care work for example. Sure you're not going to buy a yacht but it's hardly minimum wage.

You don’t need a degree for shop work etc. Teaching is woefully underpaid.

KPPlumbing · 14/06/2025 13:32

Yes I agree OP, and by luck rather than judgement, I'm in a career where I'm a high earner (business development - not something my parents or teachers had ever mentioned).

My mum pushed and pushed and pushed for me to get a good education and go to university. Her drive for me to achieve that overshadowed my upbringing if I'm being honest.

Then when I graduated, got my first temping job and was earning £1000 after tax a month in 2006, she started doing this whole working class, inverse snobbery act of "Well, that's a very respectable wage, noone should ever complain on that!". I suggested I'd not gone to university to earn such a low salary, and she said she was disappointed in me and I hadn't been raised to look down my nose at a minimum wage job! I was floored. What had the point been in her obsession with education?

I was a bit lost on what to do and she strongly encouraged an idea I had to be an executive PA (which can be a great career in itself if you get the right role). But I had a moment of realisation in my 20s where I thought "Fuck this, I don't want to be a PA. I want to be the person who HAS a PA".

I've worked up to lead a team and massively out earn market rate for the region I live in, at 41. But I wasn't given any idea of how to earn good money by my parents and have had to figure it out for myself.

mondaytosunday · 14/06/2025 13:32

Actually I have heard the opposite - people who chose careers based on the earning potential and then have, if not actually hated, disliked their jobs and wish they had followed their hearts, even if it would mean a drop in lifestyle. You spend so many hours working it should be in something you are interested in

OldChinaJug · 14/06/2025 13:31

Watermelonlollies · 14/06/2025 12:45

I never even used to think about money, but I suppose getting a bit older, having kids and just realising how much easier and enjoyable being comfortable makes life has me thinking.
What are you going to do instead?

No idea yet!

I'm still at the writing a CV and considering my options stage tbh.

I just want to be out and I didn't think I'd ever be one of the ones saying that but a new HT and DHT has completely changed the landscape of my school and I spent a long time finding one I was happy in.

RosesAndHellebores · 14/06/2025 13:30

SendBooksAndTea · 14/06/2025 13:28

That's unusual. Many teachers take their work home and do it in evenings and weekends. They also don't get paid for all the holidays, the pay is just split evenly over 12 months.

Yes, but they get significant meaningful breaks at regular intervals in a way that other workers/professionals don't. I work about 50/55 hours pw and last had a week off in February due to operational necessity.

Sweetpea59 · 14/06/2025 13:30

@Notmycircusnotmyotter tell us what you do for a job or we won't believe you

adviceneeded1990 · 14/06/2025 13:29

CatsLikeBoxes · 14/06/2025 13:24

Having 2 OK salaries obviously makes a difference too.
I can get by on my salary but there isn't spare money for fixing the roof or for holidays. But if I lived with someone else then that extra money would provide all the things I can't afford right now.

It does but then I lived alone while teaching and was better off then than I am now disposable income wise despite my salary at that point being lower!

My DHs income doesn’t fully account for a larger mortgage on a bigger house, a child, and the fact that everything (holidays, food, etc) is now x3! So while two salaries equals more money it also equals more expenses.

SendBooksAndTea · 14/06/2025 13:28

RosesAndHellebores · 14/06/2025 13:23

Teachers don't work 60 hours week in, week out and have rather more than statutory holiday entitlement.

DD is out of the house at 7am, back at 4.30pm, two or three times a week does 2/3 hours at home and fits in private tutoring which takes her annual income up to about £50k.

That's unusual. Many teachers take their work home and do it in evenings and weekends. They also don't get paid for all the holidays, the pay is just split evenly over 12 months.

Itsjustlikethat · 14/06/2025 13:26

I have and will talk about compensation as one of the factors when evaluating career options. Obviously it is not the only thing but we live in a capitalist world and choices have consequences.

tropicalteas · 14/06/2025 13:26

I wish I’d had more help and support and earlier diagnosis (ASD, ADHD and other conditions) as my education was ruined by no support . I could barely function let alone think about the future and I feel I was so let down. I’m pretty much useless to society now.

CatsLikeBoxes · 14/06/2025 13:24

adviceneeded1990 · 14/06/2025 12:56

Are you in the UK? I’m a teacher, my DH is a professional in a different industry and makes about 10K less than me and we live very comfortably - not six figure rich like everyone on MN seems to be but good size of house and garden, car, modest savings, a couple of UK breaks and one abroad holiday every year. Is it more about spending habits than salary I wonder because while teaching doesn’t create millionaires it is a well paid profession with a salary far above the UK average. The pension is also very good compared to most industries.

Having 2 OK salaries obviously makes a difference too.
I can get by on my salary but there isn't spare money for fixing the roof or for holidays. But if I lived with someone else then that extra money would provide all the things I can't afford right now.

RosesAndHellebores · 14/06/2025 13:23

SendBooksAndTea · 14/06/2025 13:19

@AmpleHazelLion That doesn't sound all that different to teaching, apart from the far lower salary and there being dinner involved. Are you under the impression teachers generally work less hours?

Teachers don't work 60 hours week in, week out and have rather more than statutory holiday entitlement.

DD is out of the house at 7am, back at 4.30pm, two or three times a week does 2/3 hours at home and fits in private tutoring which takes her annual income up to about £50k.

Greekdream · 14/06/2025 13:23

I guess a lot of this is cost of living
I think if the internet was around when I was younger it we had grown up with it
a lot of us would be going something else, just imagine all that access to information

we really had so little info

Whatanidiot123 · 14/06/2025 13:23

My parents were poor and uneducated. I knew that no matter what I would pursue a professional career and make money because I knew what it was like to not have much at all, miss out on things, be embarrassed about my house as a kid. My (former) best friend was always a bit disparaging tbh but her parents loaned/gave her the money for a house so she was able to chose low paid work and not to work at times. A safety net I could only have dreamed of. I do also enjoy my job but it comes with a level of stress that I might not choose if I wasn’t focused on financial health and ensuring financial security for my children too.

The sad thing is that many of my friends who were solidly middle class and comfortably off had teacher parents and as is pointed out on this thread - two teachers couldn’t easily afford say, a four bed house in East Dulwich and yet that was the pretty normal in the 90s. Social work, teaching etc. needs to be much higher pay.

Charlottejbt · 14/06/2025 13:22

@OnlyMabelInTheBuilding I didn't realise at the time that you had to start so early with the Careers Service. When I eventually rocked up there in my final year it was a bit of an "Oh sh#t!" moment as I found out I was supposed to have spent all the summers doing internships in London. As it happens, knowing this in advance wouldn't have done me any good as my parents made me work locally in all the long and short breaks (petrol stations and the like) and I wouldn't have had the funds or the contacts to work for free in central London. Plus all the literature seemed to be about the milk round firms who were each offering a tiny number of placements, or leaflets offering stupid fantasy advice on "How to choose between the many excellent offers of employment that you're bound to have by now" -err, if that were my problem I wouldn't have a problem! So no wonder people end up falling into teaching or entry level roles in local government. One poor guy ended up repossessing cars. It's a far cry from what we were promised, is all I'll say!

OrangeCrushes · 14/06/2025 13:22

I said YANBU because money is super important for security and happiness.

However, I think things were much, much easier for lower earners in their generation - so it may not have seemed like such a big deal to them. They won't have known how hard things would become for ordinary people.

Isdinnerreadyyet · 14/06/2025 13:21

Having attained a degree I did several jobs, until becoming a civil servant which I've done for the last 42 years.

When I joined the CS I was happy to accept the restrictions on many of my civil rights - civil servants have to resign if they want to stand for political office, MP, County Councillor etc, we have to get permission from the Foreign Office if we want to travel to China, Iran & some other countries which changes according to what's happening in the World. But I was happy to do this as, at the time I got a generous final salary pension, decent pay, sick pay. good maternity leave, flexi-time, family friendly policies etc. This helped enormously when BF as I was given a private area to express milk (talking late 1980's 1990's) though one day when my expressed milk in a baby bottle in communal fridge was depleted when I came to collect it. Yes, someone had obviously used it for their tea/coffee. 😱I put a note on all other expressed milk bottles saying 'I don't mind if you use my expressed breast milk for your coffee, but please leave enough for my baby's tea' 😂

Over time these benefits have been eroded. Our final salary pension was closed in favour of a 'career average' pension, our pay, in real terms has depleted as public services bore the brunt of 'austerity measures' taken by the previous Govt. Sickness rules have changed so that you are called in for a discussion with your manager if you go over 8 days in a rolling year.

The best advice I ever had was when I gave birth to my first child & reduced to working part time. My father recommended that I pay additional contributions into my pension. As he said at the time, it may reduce my pay by about £100 a month, but when I came to collect my pension I would feel it worthwhile. SO TRUE! I was able to collect my final salary pension 2 years ago when I reached my 60th birthday. I found that I had over 37 years paid in - nearly a full pension (it is £12kpa) plus a generous lump sum & now I'm working par-time until I can claim my state retirement pension in 5 years time & still building up a small additional career average pension which should work out at about £3Kpa. Not only that, but if I die before my DH he will get a pension of around £8kpa.

Neurodiversitydoctor · 14/06/2025 13:20

Twelftytwo · 14/06/2025 12:45

I think things have changed a bit over time though.

Graduate public sector professions like teaching, allied health professionals, social work etc used to be a good solid option and you'd even have one parent working in those jobs supporting a whole family on a single income.

Life has got a lot more expensive and salaries haven't caught up.

This I was at school with a girl who was one of 4. Huge house in West London SAHM Dad was a secondary school headmaster.

deadpantrashcan · 14/06/2025 13:19

Notmycircusnotmyotter · 14/06/2025 12:50

You need a balance. I love my career, I earn just shy of £100k working four days per week with some international travel. It's interesting and varied and I don't find it particularly stressful.

Super interested to hear what you do as well, if you’re keen on sharing?

SendBooksAndTea · 14/06/2025 13:19

AmpleHazelLion · 14/06/2025 12:46

DH is an investment banker. He works 60+ hour weeks, regularly dining w clients, working until 10pm. He earns 300k pa. Don't underestimate how stressful it is.

Saying that, he never has a chance to spend it. I'm often the one treating myself. 😆

@AmpleHazelLion That doesn't sound all that different to teaching, apart from the far lower salary and there being dinner involved. Are you under the impression teachers generally work less hours?

SuffolkBargeWoman · 14/06/2025 13:18

Poynsettia · 14/06/2025 12:59

I wondered if choosing a career in your late teens when your caring hormones are at a peak is ideal for women.

This!

Sweetpea59 · 14/06/2025 13:17

I've focused more on being a sahm, then working part or full time in low paying, but non stressful admin jobs. We've had a nice enough, comfortable & happy life thanks to dh salary. Sometimes I wish I'd strived more for a well paying career, with a bit of travel. We have savings which we would love to use to help dc with a house deposit but we might need it for our retirement.
Now, I'm approaching 60, taking early retirement in a few weeks. It's too late for me now, so if you have a chance then take it

HawthornWitch · 14/06/2025 13:17

HermioneWeasley · 14/06/2025 12:55

Remember to take into account the value of your pension as a teacher

It’s not that great. I have 19 years full-time in the TPS and am forecast to get under £15k a year if I take the pension at 60. Hardly riches.

Spidey66 · 14/06/2025 13:16

I've always been in mental health nursing. My parents may have suggested the pay ain't great, but I've always been someone who isn't interested in money. As long as I have stable, affordable housing, a modest car (well my husband's really as I don't drive) and enough money to survive I'm OK. I live within my means and have never been interested in flash cars, designer clothes and expensive holidays.