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AIBU?

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Original poster

To not heat my dinner plate?

236 replies

Jaggy1 · 13/06/2025 20:27

Just a silly one really..

My MIL has been coming to us once a week for a little while now. Every single time we have dinner whether we serve up or she does, even if we get a takeaway she always asks if I want my plate heated? Either with boiling water or in the oven if it’s being used. I just think it’s strange as I’d never do that on a random Tuesday night dinner or anything but she does it all the time 🤣
Also weird that DH never asks or cares for his plate heated any other time but he’ll always have it when she’s here.

Is this a thing? Am I the strange one 🤣
YABU- you religiously heat your plate
YANBU- never heat your plate

OP posts:
Eldermileniummam · 13/06/2025 21:50

I sometimes do in the oven or in the microwave

Createausername1970 · 13/06/2025 21:47

I do in the winter if the plates feel cold straight from the cupboard.

My mum used to warm the plates a lot but I assume that is because they didn't have central heating back in the day, so the kitchen could get cold.

SleepingisanArt · 13/06/2025 21:31

Plates heated to 60°C for everything cooked (includes bacon sandwiches). My Mum used to heat plates in the oven before serving dinner - sometimes they were too hot to touch! We heat ours in a warming drawer and will hold food in there too.

Owned several restaurants over the years - separate warming cupboards for plates and bowls (also cool cupboards for cold dishes and desserts) plus the hot lamps give the food the best chance of reaching the table at the right temperature.

(Yes, we have hot lamps in our home kitchen too! We are a bit obsessive but blame being in hospitality for that!)

DappledThings · 13/06/2025 21:29

Never do it. I always have to wait for food to cool down enough to eat, hate food being too hot.

Ricoletti · 13/06/2025 21:29

Ducksurprise · 13/06/2025 20:59

It is something that irrationally annoys me. My MIL is the same, I do it (and in all other ways I love her) but it annoys me 😂

Actually she also puts her toast in a balanced triangle to cool down before buttering the bread, so the toast is cold. This equally annoys me 😂

I do this 🤣🤣🤣

I like my toast cool so the butter doesn’t melt and make it all floppy…

Ricoletti · 13/06/2025 21:27

I stick mine in the microwave for 20 seconds before plating up. Means the food doesn’t cool down from the cold plate.

NCNC2 · 13/06/2025 21:23

Jaggy1 · 13/06/2025 21:10

My dad is like this with his tea, they got a boiling water tap installed but he won’t use it for tea as it’s ’not hot enough’ so still uses the kettle anyway 🤣

Show quote history

Oh don’t, if I walked too slow with the boiling water for tea it was “cold”
I suggested she just poured the kettle in her mouth once while my dad tried to cover up a snort laugh

marshmallowpuff · 13/06/2025 21:22

I actively don’t like my plate to be hot, but my mum won’t eat any hot food without heating plates! I have to ask specially for a cold plate at her house 😂

DiscoBob · 13/06/2025 21:21

It's nice of her to ask and volunteer to do it. It does help keep food warm.

I sometimes do it in the microwave or on the empty top bit of the oven.

I like salad etc on the plate with hot food so often I wouldn't do it for my own meals as hot lettuce is horrible!

JustFeedMeCake · 13/06/2025 21:21

My in-laws do it, my parents don’t, we don’t. I find it odd and unnecessary tbh.

CrushingOnRubies · 13/06/2025 21:19

My parents always have heated plates. I only do if I’m already using the oven. Unless I’m having peas as they always go cold really quickly

Livingonbananabread · 13/06/2025 21:19

DH always warms the plates - he’s late 40s and has done it as long as I’ve known him, so since his 20s. I didn’t grow up with it and never bother for myself, but do now for family meals as otherwise he’d go and warm the plates while the meal I’ve just cooked goes cold! Just in the oven on the lowest setting, or as it cools if it’s been on.

wwyd2021medicine · 13/06/2025 21:17

I only heat plates for a take away as it's already begun to cool on the way home

DrCoconut · 13/06/2025 21:10

I was always taught to let my food cool down. I think my mum was afraid of me burning my mouth and it was also seen as greedy to be unable to wait. So plate warming wasn't a thing as it made cooling down take longer. I still don't have food lava hot. Or drinks.

Original poster
Jaggy1 · 13/06/2025 21:10

NCNC2 · 13/06/2025 21:06

This reminds me of my mum who insisted stuff was “cold” - she would reject soup if it wasn’t bubbling like lava
I don’t eat slow enough for food to go cold so I don’t bother heating plates!

My dad is like this with his tea, they got a boiling water tap installed but he won’t use it for tea as it’s ’not hot enough’ so still uses the kettle anyway 🤣

OP posts:
TakeMe2Insanity · 13/06/2025 21:10

Dangermoo · 13/06/2025 20:30

It's a generation thing.

This.

In previous times it was harder to reheat food, houses were colder no central heating so possibly in winter a plate would be freezing and then warm food on it would go cold quicker especially if sat waiting around.

My mum never heated plates but she when she first moved to the UK in the late 60s apparently everyone would do it and she found it very strange.

Icanttakethisanymore · 13/06/2025 21:10

Hate a hot plate. I need the plate to cool my food down so I can scoff it faster.

NCNC2 · 13/06/2025 21:06

This reminds me of my mum who insisted stuff was “cold” - she would reject soup if it wasn’t bubbling like lava
I don’t eat slow enough for food to go cold so I don’t bother heating plates!

BeKindOpalBear · 13/06/2025 21:03

I pop our plates in the microwave for 1 minute, we're in our 60s but only started doing this around 5 years ago, I also developed a dislike of Luke warm food, no idea why!

Flamingfeline · 13/06/2025 21:02

My husband always does which used to annoy me but now I go along with it (26 years later). It’s unnecessary however in our house. Every last crumb is finished and the plates licked clean within moments of them landing in front of us. My mum (now 94) has never done it. Neither do my adult daughters.

Original poster
Jaggy1 · 13/06/2025 21:02

Ducksurprise · 13/06/2025 20:59

It is something that irrationally annoys me. My MIL is the same, I do it (and in all other ways I love her) but it annoys me 😂

Actually she also puts her toast in a balanced triangle to cool down before buttering the bread, so the toast is cold. This equally annoys me 😂

My mum does this with her toast!

The amount of times I’ve gone over at like 2pm and found a toast castle and she just says oh I forgot about that I was waiting for it to cool down 🤣

OP posts:
Original poster
Jaggy1 · 13/06/2025 21:01

Also just to add, she doesn’t ask me to heat her plate for her but she’ll do her own and ask if I want mine done too, not bashing her in any way!

She probably thinks I’m as weird for not as I think she is for it 🤣

OP posts:
Ducksurprise · 13/06/2025 20:59

It is something that irrationally annoys me. My MIL is the same, I do it (and in all other ways I love her) but it annoys me 😂

Actually she also puts her toast in a balanced triangle to cool down before buttering the bread, so the toast is cold. This equally annoys me 😂

Doggielovecharlotte · 13/06/2025 20:58

DumbbellIdiot · 13/06/2025 20:31

My MIL is obsessed with heating plates. Nothing cooler than volcanic will do for her. Last Xmas she offered to heat the plates at her house and bring them to us as mine were clearly not hot enough for her last Xmas. Utterly batshit idea.

OMG this is so funny…I’m imagining her with asbestos hands now bringing the plates in

Betsylee · 13/06/2025 20:57

I think it's definitely an older generation thing to do. We have friends who do it and then my husband wants to hear theirs when they eat at ours! All a bit of a faff tbh, can understand it if the middle of winter and house is freezing so maybe that's where it's originated from.