I think I hate being a Mum :-(

So I'm not the only one who drafts MN posts in my head 😀

The parents may hate it. The thread is about someone not enjoying motherhood so doubt they'd enjoy doing bloody crafts and baking with toddlers.

Ok so if you have a background in early years and kids like this stuff so much then please tell me why in years ( at least 12 ) of my kids being in nursery I had the grand total of Two paintings. No cereal box models etc. with all of the kids the staff were telling me they wouldn't partake in doing this stuff . I see the other kids come out of nursery daily with piles of stuff they had made

And it wasn't the nursery as they were at 3 different nurseries. So obviously my kids didn't enjoy this stuff. Others won't either

Who said they'd hate it? These are typically things children enjoy which keeps them busy. It was good suggestion. I have a background in early years ...

None of mine have ever enjoyed craft or bloody baking TBH. I think my DS may have been the only child to never come out of nursery with a painting, model or other creation and he was there pretty much full time for. over 4 years.

But the point is if someone is struggling with parenthood then suggesting doing stuff they'd hate is not going to help matters is it. ? More likely to make them feel more " relegated" to having to resort to kids stuff

I could only bear it because I did it with friends. Make friends with similar aged kids. Let the kids run wild in parks/beaches/forests/ gardens/museums while you hang out with friends. It's the only way it's fun.

I really struggled when my kids were that age. They’re just so needy, you have to be “on” all the time, it’s exhausting. Once they become more independent and able to entertain themselves it gets easier I promise.

Toddlers are exhausting, especially if you've got a little danger loving daredevil you can't take your eyes off!

Yes!!! I turn around, DD1 is on top of a table within 15 seconds. She can go up and down stairs now so she doesn’t stay where I put her, fights naps as if she thinks she is going to miss something. Loves throwing things and taking things out. Her name is said countless times followed by ‘no’ by all but sen DS1 who runs away and hides from her. She’s a happy chatty, giggling tot but bloody heck, I wish I had her first then last. Would be much easier to get homework done without her trying to eat DS2’s homework and reading book because she’s teething. Imagine explaining that to a teacher. 😂

I feel you so much OP. I love my kids but I sometimes think I wouldn’t have had them if I had known how hard it would be. Then other times I feel like I’m doing a good job and they are doing well. It seems like riding a wave rather than being on an upwards trajectory.

I feel guilty for everything all of the time, and I wish I could put that in a box. My husband doesn’t seem to feel the same, he just rolls along with it all.

someone up thread suggested swapping your day off for a midweek day. I think that’s a brilliant suggestion, if it’s possible. Now my eldest is 8 it is a little easier as he is so good at chatting, understanding reasons, and is generally fun to be around. My younger child is very difficult and not great at regulating his emotions so lots of tantrums. But I’m hoping, looking at my 8yr old, that this too shall pass.

sending hope to you.

These are things kids enjoy. It's not about what you find riveting...

The op isn't talking about workdays. She's referring to her Friday off + the weekend.

And yes, getting out and about helps.

Toddlers are exhausting, especially if you've got a little danger loving daredevil you can't take your eyes off! I agree, get them outside and running around to wear them out as much as possible. I think it helps to spend time with friends with same age children so you can let the kids play in the garden and have a coffee and a chat while you watch them. I used to give mine tea fairly early - 5.30ish then I would stick them both in the bath with lots of toys, bubbles etc and let them play and have fun. Mine were in bed by 7, stories read and lights out! If you get a bit of an evening to wind down yourself and have a bit of peace it makes such a difference! Can you and DH give each other a few hours to yourself at the weekend so you both get a bit of me time?

I think you are in a crazy hard time with the dc ages and it is relentless- I suspect once the youngest is 4 life will start easing up

It's OK just to put the telly on sometimes.
It's all exhausting, especially with a toddler. You just need to sit on the sofa with a cup of tea while they watch Bluey or similar. You can just nod and say, that's nice or mmm occasionally.
Give yourself a break. Sending 💐

I must say the teen years were definitely the favourite stage for me. They had grown into " proper people" who could have decent conversations and were interesting

Sounds riveting NOT

Solidarity OP and PP too 💖 we’ve got a weekend away coming up this weekend and I’m already wrung out. I find it easier when I don’t have DH in the mix - he’s tagging along to music class tomorrow before we set off for the weekend 🫠 his mindset is ‘well my stuff is sorted so we can go’ erm 😐 we need DD things, house bag (self catering) and car needs to be jengad as he didn’t bother being organised by sourcing a roof box 🤦‍♀️

I wished for children so much. So much we went through IVF twice. Both times successful. I then struggled so much with the early years.

I had a danger-seeker with my first. Couldn't keep him in the house - he'd jump out his window to play with the neighbours kids. He was also super difficult at every stage.

I then had the perfect second child. Until he turned into a screamer at about 2. He would scream in happiness and in frustration. It almost broke me. I have sensory issues, and, well, yeah.

But I'm here now with two wonderful teenagers and I wish I could have shown myself 10 years ago how it would turn out.

They WILL become people, and people that don't just take from you. I know it's hard. I once threw a plate at both of them as I'd reached the end of my last nerve. I did aim for next to them, but they do remember the time I just lost the plot and threw a plate at them.

Don't be like me.

Yes, see, it's your fault OP, you're not trying hard enough or doing enough. And I bet you've never thought of any of these things before....🙄😂

Can you up your hours so that you work Fridays too? and maybe drop back down later on when they are older and more pleasant to be around. 2 is a crap age.

Many years before I became a mother, I stayed with a mother and her two children. The mother said, "The best thing is my life is my kids." But also, "The best time of day is when the kids are in bed." Both can be true.

I really didn’t enjoy the early years. I am and was a good mother, but I don’t enjoy young children. On the flip side- I LOVE having teens! They clean and tidy, have full interesting conversation, are funny and fun to be around. We can go places we ALL enjoy. You can REASON with teens- in a way that young children just can’t. What I’m saying, in a long way, is that maybe you don’t hate being a mum. Maybe you hate this stage of parenthood. I did.

It can be relentless op.
Then all of a sudden you are just a taxi driver to your teenagers!

I’m in teenage absolute HELL at the moment. I hate being a parent sometimes too.

Ah yes solidarity here op.
i spent years at home with my dc, i did overall actually really enjoy it but there were always some days where i must have felt despair at ‘more of the same’.
I know you’ve said you do get them out but I found it useful to have a plan of doing something every day. If nothing else it seemed to make the time pass quicker and if it was out of the house then there was the double bonus of not having mess to clear up at home.
One of my favourites to fall back on was walking out to get picnic things and then go to a park and stay there as long as possible. Boring for adults and yours will be at different ability levels of what they can do in the park too because of their ages. Always helpful if you can rope in a friend too.
Equally make up a job, ‘we must send x a card in the post’ and then make a card, walk to a far away post box and send. If they want to wander down a different road, fine, if they want to walk along the brick wall, fine, if they want to stop and look at some ants, great, it’s all wasting time!
Finally, feel free to ignore all advice, wasn’t sure if you wanted some suggestions or just wanted to vent - either are acceptable!!

Thanks for your honesty.
Sadly for me,it is much worse now grown-up.
Addiction, prison etc etc etc
I've had to tap into higher power to lessen the nightmare