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Original poster

Childminder not there at drop off

131 replies

Rockchick76 · 12/06/2025 09:51

Hi
My best friend uses a childminder 4 days a week for her 2 year old DD. Whilst I preferred a nursery for my 2 I get that it works for her. Anyway she called me yesterday upset because she turned up to drop off her DD and the childminder had left to walk 3 children to the nearby school and only the childminder's partner was at home. It's the same dropoff time every day, on her way to work, and she'd had no heads up from the childminder that she wouldn't be at home at the usual DD drop-off time. Childminder's partner reassured her that he is DBS cleared and that childminder would be back really soon, so she reluctantly left her DD with him as she had an important meeting to get to, but she said she felt really upset. I'm wondering if it's even legal for that to have happened? Obviously DD was fine but unless childminder's partner is officially employed as her assistant (which he isn't, he's a handyman, has his own business apparently) then surely he shouldn't have offered to take my friend's DD? My friend is really questioning her judgement and thinking should she have waited and missed the meeting. I'm wondering about the legalities of it and want to help advise her, can any of you help? thanks in advance

OP posts:
bugalugs45 · 12/06/2025 09:56

When my sister enrolled her child( not sure if right word ) with their childminder she was told that occasionally husband or even cm’s adult child ( all DBS checked ) would be left with them briefly,most likely in an emergency but could happen ,
but I do think your friend should have been informed of this to make sure she was agreeable .
But as is normal with these situations if she’s not happy she’s going to have find alternative arrangements if childminder can’t promise that it won’t happen again .

mummytrex · 12/06/2025 09:55

Was your friend running late? Regardless I wouldn't be happy leaving the kid with the husband. Either way she needs to talk to the childminder to establish what happened and then go from there.

anytipswelcome · 12/06/2025 09:55

I wouldn’t have left my child in that situation, especially as there was no prior heads up from the childminder herself.

But I appreciate people don’t always think straight in the moment and that she may have panicked because of the time constraints and made a risky call.

A really foolish thing for her partner to agree to as well, tbh.

Your poor friend I bet she felt sick all day. What did the childminder say at pick up?

LandSharksAnonymous · 12/06/2025 09:54

I wouldn't have left my child there.

I could claim to be the Pope - it doesn't mean I am. Same things applies to the childminder's partner. Just because he says he has a DBS doesn't mean he does.

I don't know about the legality side of it, but in terms of parenting I think she made the wrong call.

And I would would find a new childminder (and tbh I'd be wondering how often my child had been left alone with this man when the childminder should have been doing her job). Although I apprecaite that is easier said than done!

bigboykitty · 12/06/2025 09:54

I withdrew my baby from a childminder for this reason after the childminder wasn't there at pick up. She stated her husband was registered as her assistant, but someone who would not tell me that my baby would be left with a third party is not someone I could trust. I found a nursery instead.

TY78910 · 12/06/2025 09:53

I don’t know about the legalities but personally I would have missed / been late to the meeting. Obviously what’s done is done and you can’t take it back but I would have called the childminder and seen which school she walked to and walked my DD there and left her with childminder. Totally unprofessional for her to have made arrangements and then left too.