Open door for someone on crutches.

Absolutely, of course I'd open the door, or at the very least, offer to do so. If it turns out that the person doesn't need my help, or would rather I didn't, then so be it, no harm done. But I couldn't sit and watch someone struggle. 👍

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I'm long term disabled and find it demoralising that people ignore me and don't do small things that would make my life so much easier, like opening a door when both my hands are holding crutches.

When I'm able I offer help to other disabled people or anyone who looks like they need it (e.g. holding bags full of shopping). Tbh if someone gets offended I'm okay with it.

This. I dislike people assuming I can't do something because of the wheelchair, and I wouldn't assume anything about others for that reason.

I’m disabled and will always stand by if I need help I will ask for it. I’m far from a professional victim when I’m don’t seek help or look around and expect it. You don’t speak for all disabled people.

What is the point of having a poll if people complain about the options people pick?

Yep, same as I would if someone was carrying something that made it awkward for them to open the door, or pushing a buggy or whatever. I'm a nice enough person when the effort involved is minimal and doesn't cost me anything.

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Apparently the voices of what disabled people would prefer doesnt matter… as long as the abled body person feels they are helping, apparently all that matters as it’s good manners 🙄

I suppose it is the bystander effect; and maybe, whenever people are in doctors premises, the old instincts of fear of covid and “social distancing” (the biggest oxymoron in history) kick in. Nobody can get close enough to help anybody at any cost because it kills grannies, innit.

Even before that, in MN contrary fashion, I don’t mind betting that there have been MN threads “AIBU not to want help when I’m on crutches”.

The whole “you never know what they’re going” line is always trotted out on here to justify all sorts of rude and inconsiderate behaviour.

Doesn’t help someone on crutches? “you have no idea what’s going on in their own life.”

the 99%. who wouldn’t give up a seat on public transport? “You don’t know what’s going on for them, they must have an invisible disability.”

Someone screams at you in a shop? “you don’t know what’s happening in their own life.”

It’s tedious and is used to justify rudeness and inconsiderate behaviour on every level.

Of course there are people going through stuff. But not the majority of the population. Most of them are just selfish.

As for the poster who said “if I want help I’ll ask,” and who is almost bitter at being offered help, it’s that kind of attitude which leads to people not being offered help. Because people feel it will be thrown back in their face.

If someone tries to help then “no thank you” will suffice. But the person you need help from tomorrow probably won’t bother if you give them that attitude today.

I have a different disability and this whole sense of “how dare the public want to help” infuriates me. There are people within my own community who are like that, and who come across almost as professional victims, veering between how nasty the public are for not helping when they want, and daring to offer help when they don’t. You’re not doing the disabled any favours.

There is of course a section of society who absolutely are infuriating, such as the people who assume where I’m going and try to drag me across roads or into shops I didn’t intend to visit. Or the people who try to feed my guide dog or get arsy that they can’t stroke him while he’s working. But for the most part the public are lovely, and only want to help not to intrude.

I don’t need abled body people to open doors for me when im capable of doing it myself, even if people think they know better and can’t see past my disability. Good manners means not assuming. Surely, everyone knows that?

I think there is a big difference between opening doors (always polite imo) and for example some one asking if you need help getting to the toilet (very patronizing and demoralising)

I smile and say thankyou. Life's too short to educate people.

I also open the door for other people who may or may not be capable. It's just good manners.

Yes, if you are long term disabled people asking you if you need help can be quite demolising. While opening doors is usually helpful, generally I prefer to be left alone. If I wanted help I would ask.

I'm not surprised; earlier this year I was accompanying DS to a hospital appointment and there were manual double fire doors in the corridor.

DS wondered why I suddenly sprinted off 15m ahead of him. There was a large, clunky wheelchair ahead, and despite being pushed by another person, it was clearly going to be awkward for them to get through it as the door pivots in one direction and pushing straight ahead is another and there was little spare width for them to be pushed out of alignment.

They were thankful for the intervention.

I've used crutches previously and pulling on doors was logistically awkward for controlling the crutches and weight distribution.

My most withering sarcasti-thank was to the man who let the door shut on me when I was heavily pregnant, limping (ended up on crutches very soon after) with a toddler on one hip and a swimming bag on the other. I was clearly struggling with hands literally full. Pulling on fire doors disturbed my pelvic pain.
He was just totally oblivious to his surroundings.

So many people are just lost in their own world and unless it directly affects them they don’t engage… it is very sad how self absorbed / selfish we have become as a society.

Am a regular user of various mobility aids I am always so grateful if someone gets the door for me… just makes life that tiny bit easier.

it takes so little effort to hold or open a door for anyone regardless of them being disabled, juggling kids and a buggy etc… but basic manners / consideration for others is really a dying thing and it is very sad .

It seems that everyone has their heads buried in their phones and if only people looked up occasionally and engaged with the real world around them rather than the online world - our communities would be much friendlier places.

Most public buildings have accessible doors now. Incredible that a GP surgery doesn't, that really needs updating.

I am disabled and mostly use a wheelchair but use crutches if I’m out of it.

about 1 person a year helps, most don’t

I've had a rough time on crutches recently, barged into the road by a man steaming towards me oblivious, backed into and nearly floored by another man and certainly nobody has opened any doors for me. But then again im 63 and have to remember I'm invisible now. I'll have to wear head to toe high vis.

I totally understand your frustration, but you don't know why those people are in that waiting room. They may appear able bodied but may be going through acute illness, suffer mental/cognitive disabilities and so on. I completely get your frustration but you've no idea why the other patients also found themselves there. I'd be quick to judge too if I was in your position, but an outsiders view gives me the spoons to think of the above.

I was once in a&e, using a walking stick and trying to hold a pad cover on my bleeding other hand and no one opened any doors for me, including into the X-ray department or room 😂 personally I am disabled and appreciate when others hold doors etc. but there are some people who take offence at it so I sort of understand why some people don’t help with doors.

Brilliant thanks 👍