To think Mumsnet is more vitriolic than it used to be?

I cannot comment on what it was like years ago.

I think parts of it are incredibly supportive.

And times I think it fully earns its “Prosecco StormFront nickname.

So do I. In fact I think all the posts should be shown, if only to make other posters aware of those who set out to deliberately upset and humiliate.

It is adult bullying, and unacceptable. It is also stalking very often. You see it in several threads when 3/4 people start to stalk one poster they do not agree with. Stalking means pursuing someone against their wishes, following them, writing to them, phoning them, repeatedly, making their lives a misery.

It is also stalking when they take advantage of an anonymous social media site and castigate anyone they think might be upset by it. It is particularly bad when teens to that to teens and they take their own lives.

Posters do it anonymously, thinking they can get away with it. Then when someone gives as good as they get, they have it deleted, so no one ever knows how bad they are.

They do their worst, inviting posters to answer them, and have those answers removed so that it looks as though what they said is true, because the subject of their torment hasn't replied!

I do not believe those who abuse the site are mothers. If they are, their parenting is not good, and for the sake of the children, their names should be revealed to the authorities.

I noticed too. Worse actually in the last few years.

I sometimes think it is to block posters who are opposing the thread. If posters do not agree with someone who has a justified issue, there are posters who will insult and upset anyone whose post they do not agree with, in an effort to influence the vote on the thread or upset the OP of a thread.

Some posters have actually supported breaking the law. I noticed that in several threads to do with children. It horrified me that so many posters thought it was fine to have under age sex, even that it did not have psychological affects; that there were no sexually transmitted diseases, that you cannot get inflamation of the womb leading to serious conditions later in life. Some even said that the police condoned it if it was two 14 year olds. Any poster who did not agree was vilified, insulted, sworn at. Even someone who admitted to being a social worker said let them get on with it.

I was thinking of just that thread when the news yesterday was about the riots in Northern Ireland where two boys raping a girl. I do not know if the police did nothing or not. People took justice into their own hands.

I think Mumsnet were wise to take away the grinning emoji, because far from being used as a positive tool, it was being used as an insult to posters they didn't agree with.

At issue too, was the number of posters who said their was nothing wrong with flying abroad on a week's holiday leaving the minor teens behind because they didn't want to go. Anyone who was horrified at the thought were insulted, sworn at, ridiculed and humiliated.

Vitriolic??? Oh do shut up... What a whinger!😉

I've been here since 2011 and I distinctly remember that one of the first posts I ever read outside the Pregnancy board was someone complaining about how much more unpleasant things had become. I don't think it's significantly different myself, and the posts complaining about it being kinder and funnier in the past have been appearing for so many years it's a tradition as venerable as 'Should I call my baby SomethingDeeplyUnwise?' posts.

The difference I notice is more way posters posting to ask whether they're pregnant and then posting endless subsequent photos of pregnancy tests asking whether the line is getting stronger or weaker.

I agree. It is definitely not as entertaining as in days of yore.

This is true. But I think there used to be a lot of dry, cutting and very clever humour in the viper’s nest that was Mumsnet back in the day.

Nowadays the viper’s nest seems so po-faced and earnest. Or downright bitchy but without any humour or self awareness to lighten it.

And so many puritanical or pointless posts picking up on an innocuous aspect of the OPs post. OP mentions in passing she went to McDonalds - cue lots of replies banging on about UPFs being the work of the devil, while ignoring the main points in OPs post.

Or, is it because we're all older, with less patience, possibly peri menopausal or full blown menopausal and we're just p!ssed off and sick of other people's sh!t?
Asking for a friend...

We don't just come on here for advice, though. We could just use Google for that.

It would be so sad if MN just turns into AI bots bouncing stuff back and forth, with nary an actual human to be seen anymore.

I’ve been here for years and years.

There has been a change for the worse.
I think that is partly due to being more men on mn than ever before. What I’ve noticed is that there is a lot more scolding of women and “what about the menz” and tonnes of vitriol against women and bizarre comments on posts talking about relationships. I know it was always there a bit in the past, but there’s a different quality to it these days.

Yes the very dry humour and laughing out loud at some of the comments died off around the pandemic and hasn’t returned. I hope it does too. The lack of lightness I also see in real life.

I would also say my experience has been very kind and positive on here. I have found the best advice on here of anywhere. Maybe I have just been lucky.

I've been here for ages (NC regularly) and I've noticed that people are a lot less empathetic now. Even when a poster is discussing grief, for example, or really awful, painful experiences they've had, someone tends to put the boot in. It's actually quite shocking to me- I find myself thinking how posters can sleep at night after they've enjoyed kicking someone who was looking for a handhold.

Ive been on MN since 2004. Its definitely not as friendly or as kind as it was then, or 10 years ago or 5 years ago. Its gradually shifted. Lots of the same vibe is still here but a lot less of it than there used to be.

People used to come for a laugh, now they come for a fight.

When was the last time you saw someone suggest a thread go into classics? Some people won't even know what I mean!

I remember the packs of bullies years ago, they are banned now. Gosh it was horrendous watching them go after certain posters. It’s much better now, I think dissenting views are useful. Different views are helpful.

I agree but I think the difference is that people sharing an opinion are somehow directly attacking a poster. People are entitled to opinions and unless they are racist or discriminatory etc it doesn’t make them wrong.

People want to argue the person not the point.

People want to point out where people are wrong - often aggressively.

And they behave in a way you never would if the person was stood in front of you.

It’s kinda ridiculous at times.

Agree. I’ve been in here for a few years and think it’s nastier now than when I joined. To the point where I find Reddit (!!!) a nicer and more supportive place. Also, over the last few months either I’ve become very cynical or pretty much every ‘big’ thread now reads as fake to me. I close down at least 50% of the threads I open because I don’t believe the OP is genuine.

Oh me too.

100% this. I have only been using mumsnet a little while but people get really arsey over minor details and ready for a fight and that is on most threads I read here.

"If you don't leave on my say so, you're abusing your kids yourself."

Paraphrasing of course but you know the sentiment.

Nasty.

I definitely used to laugh a lot more!

Yes, it was kind of ‘take no fools’ no-nonsense and wit where people were trying to ‘educate’ each other. Obvious there were still dicks but in general that was what vipers nest meant. Now people are often really cold and callous on threads where someone is really struggling. The sort of threads that would have been left alone in the past. Often the first poster to respond on a thread, and often thick as well as cruel.

"And so many people taking everything incredibly seriously."

I'm glad the trend for telling to people to go 'NC' (no contact) has died down.
That was being trotted out at every minor dispute for a good while.
As if.