Being labelled unreliable as a working mum

This sounds cultural - move to another company.

I very much doubt that OP would find a company that allows her the flexibility she currently has.

As someone who has lined managed a span of around 50, I've always encouraged balance and flex. I believe and have seen evidence that in the rule of "give and take" the employer invariably wins if they allow some gives. Unless the role is factory floor, travelling or timetabled to some extent, I'd always allow a school run so long as the hours more or less add up, and I'd leave it to the employee to work it out too. In these enlightened days of diversity, I'm shocked by some of the opinions in this thread. I've also done and overseen a lot of project management. I'd suggest that a project manager who can't cope with a planned absence within a day isn't managing their portfolio very well. This sounds cultural - move to another company.

Posters were trying to work out why she was being labelled as unreliable, and making (quite reasonable) suggestions as to why. OP's responses also made it quite difficult to work out what was going on (2 year old, school, amount of child care, 1/2 terms).

It turns out it's just her LM who has a problem and that OP's unusual working pattern has been approved by the CEO.

OP I'm shocked at the lack of support you are getting here. I just wanted to say I see you and totally get what you are saying and I think you are doing an amazing job. You seem like an excellent conscientious employee and a wonderful caring mother. It sounds like you have very little time for you. Running here there & everywhere to please others and keep your boss(es) happy. Society needs to stop punishing working mothers who are trying so hard to provide, especially those who don't have a partner. Well done you for getting promoted at work under these circumstances.I hope your line manager either leaves or realizes what a great job you are doing and that you figure out a better way for you and your LO. Under-appreciated for sure. Please try to ignore the harsh comments on here and don't feel the need to explain yourself. xx

Agree with this...it's very different collecting a 11 or 12 year old from school and a 2 year old. You literally need eyes in back of head to look after a 2 year old. There's no way that she is able to work properly and look after a 2 year old.

It's not just the school pick up. It's the half hearted working from 3-5pm as she's multi tasking.

Companies might be prepared to flex to help parents but there's a line were they end up feeling they are getting the urine extracted from their goodwill.

In this day and age I disagree. It’s very common in my experience for companies to be flexible around regular commitments like school pick up etc. there are lots of businesses that value a happy, settled workforce and prioritise work life balance rather than just bums in seats.

I don't, you won, I apologised.
P.S. farm cats would not be tollerated by my very useless cats, one of them is old and is very grumpy with his teritory. Except for the pigeons. Pigeons are fine creatures to watch from the safety of the decking, everything else he gets grumpy at!

There’s nothing to agree over.

It’s a fact that the CMS is not fit for purpose. The OP had already mentioned the sperm doner wanted to be NOTHINV more than one so she‘a more than likely already gone that route and found it’s not as easy as many seem to think it is unless he’s a willing participant in the process (if we had prison sentences etc for this shit like in many US states, that would be fabulous - but men are just allowed to get away with it over here if they wish to evade)

Why do you insist on having the last word?

Suggest additional cats from a local farm.

And I apologise if I upset you.

I did not put words in your mouth at any point. I said that is not certitude whether the OP seek this possibility, hence I asked. Op did not confirm she seeked maintanance. Hence, I asked, and you started arguing. Seriously, drop it, we will not come to am agreement and that is fine. We are allowed to have different opinion. I defended my statement you deffended yours. Good. Let it go, is all good with me. Look after yourself. Btw, the pigeons story is true, ny husband runs like a manic in the garden and my two very useless cats sit and watch him with amazement. Is quite hilarious! Peace 😊

Really?

Not my problem if you put words in my mouth. And it’s perfectlg oj gif jd to point out if someone has.

Peace.

I have 2 lovely chery trees the pigeons keep eating the fruit. Come here please and fight with them, you could get your fighting out of the system and I can keep my cherries. Win-win!

I couldn’t agree more.

I cannot control if you decide to put words into my mouth.

That does not equal certitude nor was it confirmed by OP. Hence, why I asked. Peace

No. Not assumed - likely the scenario. Certainly a very strong possibility.

Challenge is now ‘hate’?

Good grief

Collect and Pay is a service many parents have used to claim maintenance from an unwilling /uncooperative parent.
I know it has its limitations (self employed parents, those who leave the country) but it has helped for many.

I asked if it was explored as an option. Stop the hate, is fine, seeiously. OP said dad does not want to pay, nothing more. You assumed the rest. Chill!

Oh my goodness.

The toxic positivity just keeps on coming.

Reading something on Google is not the same of thousands of women’s experiences with CMS. THE CMS IS NOT FIT FOR PURPOSE.

OP has already said that dad wants no involvement - and likely she will have tried CMS/pursuing it.

I didn't receive a Penny. Ever. And there was nothing I could do about it apart from cut my child’s losses and do the best I could with the cards I’d been given.

If you’ve not lived it, don’t try to tell others how to do it.

I genuinely asked if the option was explored. OP did not mention anything about this so I asked. I googled and came with this
https://commonslibrary.parliament.uk/research-briefings/cbp-7774/
It is enforcable. You don't know untill you explore the option, you can't go "oh I won't botter coz CMS is shit" this attitude will take you nowhere

Yeah exactly she’s taking the piss

You cannot (in this country) force a parent who doesn’t want to pay because the CMS is not fit for purpose.

Well I don't know, I asked if the option was explored as the OP did not mention anything about this. Do you know she had difficulty in getting maintanance? How do you know that? Did she try? At the end of the day, is society responsable for someone's bad choices? As usually, is easy to find problems in solutions and any sensible sugestion and closed it down before is even explored, because "we don't know how hard it is".