Being labelled unreliable as a working mum

So you haven't even looked into what you'd get on UC if you dropped your hours?? Facepalm.

If you are feeling targeted by your line manager, I would keep a record of any interactions, emails etc.

www.gov.uk/help-with-childcare-costs/universal-credit

I think you should just sit the project manager down and say - the CEO I'd happy with my performance. He recognises that I have childcare responsibilities and that that affects my availability but nonetheless he is happy with my work and my performance. I have had reasonable adjustments and flexibility agreed formally so I can collect my child from nursery. I appreciate you are unhappy with this but this is the situation. If you have any other suggestions as to how I could better meet your requests I'd be open to hearing them but unfortunately the flexibility that has been agreed by my manager is not something that is possible to change given my circumstances.

I do agree with others though that you really can't work with your two year old there, it is a really bad idea. You must be able to find another option -could you eg team up with another mum in a similar situation and each take the two kids two afternoons a week and take those off? Agree formally that you work between eg 0830 and 1330, then 1900-2100 or whatever it might be? Your child needs your full attention as does your employer, and it just can't work trying to focus on both simultaneously.

When bosses say 'if you've finished go early ' they mean now and again, if there's not something else you could get started on. They don't mean 'leave early every day and don't bother booking any childcare as a permanent thing'! You're what, finishing at 2 every day? That's 15 hours a week! If you're not careful your work will notice that your job can be done in part time hours and then they won't need a full time person

You pay for full time daycare 7-6pm like everyone else does. I would not be happy if I was your line manager and you were working with 2 year old at home

How can you with a two year old? The CEO is understanding but obviously ignorant to how your team works if your line manager is unhappy. It would be better to come to an official arrangement where your calendar is blocked out while you’re looking after your child but you make up your hours another time. Otherwise it will cause resentment in your team.

I would suggest when line manager said you’re unreliable you refer her to the CEO.

The CEO sounds like a good boss who respects work life balance and would rather the work is done than micro manage.

Maybe an email to line manager reminding her as per the CEOs agreement you take your unpaid lunch break between X and Y time and have that time blocked out on your calendar.

ask her if she specifically has concerns that’s you’ve missed deadlines or she’s just unhappy that as a parent you need a flexible working pattern?

I suggest arranging a meeting with your line manager, CEO and yourself, maybe HR if it’s available. See if you can come to some agreement. I’d suggest having a list of everything you feel you contribute, examples of how you go above and beyond. Acknowledge that you leave early for pick up, but give examples of how you balance that. This way everyone is in agreement of what is expected from you.

So one single person has a problem with you.
Were you having a bad afternoon? Because your OP is pretty dramatic (heart broken, giving up work, drained from the judgement).

From September you will be entitled to 30 funded childcare hours. So I think it would be wise to plan using those and explain to your employer that this will be your plan so that you can pick up at 4.30, instead of 2.30. Financially this wouldn’t cost you more with the funded hours but it’ll be a better solution for your work.
It’s a nightmare being a working mum to a preschooler, and like you, I have a 2yo and no help from family. I work in a school so that holidays aren’t an issue, and I’ve planned nursery hours around mine. But I’m lucky that I can (just!!!) about afford it all. You could consider a job change to something more suitable. I have no idea how you are managing to be present in work whilst parenting solo a toddler, that to me is superhuman! So I can see why your work have an issue with this, but understand totally the frustration if the work is getting done on time…
Its time for a meeting where you compromise (upping nursery hours from September to coincide with the extra funding) and your work compromise to support this (let you finish early if you don’t take a lunch break, without kicking up about it). Good luck!

@Positivegirlyoh sound in a right bind good for you for working to support your child BUT and it’s a big but, picking a 10 year old up from school for 10 minutes then working with them in the house is fine. A 2 year old??? Not a chance, in fact it would be pure dangerous to ignore them whilst you work or you are ignoring work whilst with the kid?

I was ( and still am) a working single mum of 3 - I used childcare right up till year 9 for my eldest - they were 1,6 and 8 when I became single - benefits covered a lot of the cost - have you checked your entitlement?

Kindly.

Your line manager is employed by the CEO for the day to day running of the department/ staff. They may have deliberately chosen this person with that energy and different approach.

If your line manager has raised issues around reliability/ availability I'd listen very closely and work with them on a solution.

Your CEO isn't going to protect you they might try and gather evidence to support what you and the line manager are saying. And then make a decision based on that.

In the end, they are running a business. They are there to make money. They pay you to help them to make that money. So if there are doubts about your performance/ money making the CEO will listen to the line manager first and to you later. Because even the CEO needs a payday like everyone else in that business.

You are arguing very strongly that your performance is fine and that the CEO has approved your working hours, so it sounds like this is just someone or a few people having a problem with that.

Tell them what you're telling us here. Stand up for yourself.

Surely the problem is that your diary is blocked out beyond the late lunch break. Part time work may work better for you.

I've worked with someone who did the school run daily. You might be making the hours up elsewhere but it's in the middle of core working hours for everyone else. That's an hour of the afternoon that you aren't available for calls and meetings. if anyone works an 8-4 type hours day then by the time you respond to them it's the end of their working day or they're working late to use your response. One-off appointments e.g. Dr's or dentist in the middle of the day are one thing but when it's every day it's taking the piss. I don't go expect to take my lunch at 10am to do a gym class or walk the dog!! Unfortunately you are the sort of person who gets working parents a bad name.

This is the culture / mindset of either the company &/or your colleagues. You have no control over that so it might not be a great fit for you.

Have you formally requested flexible working? That might be a route so at least your manager actually has to read the policy

Pfffff, I wouldn't struggle to work with managers who have 'different energy' to each other. You need things to be open and clear.

But you haven't finished you work at 3pm if you are expected to be available to attend meetings. It sounds like the CEO doesn't know how your team works.

Maybe you just need to grow a thicker skin. You are being judged but does that affect your pay or the job. If it works for you, why do you care what your colleagues think. The CEO employed you knowing your circumstances so what’s the real problem here