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Original poster

Not travelling with kids to siblings wedding after relocating

34 replies

TheTaupeGoose · 11/06/2025 11:02

We have just finished relocating to a new town, ~100 miles from where we used to live. Our young children (2 and 4) are both still adjusting, having mini breakdowns, trying to gain control, and generally just not being their usual selves.

We are all expected to attend a close relatives wedding in 2 weeks time, 800miles from where we live. We are worried that taking the children on a massive road trip, to an unfamiliar place for what to them will be an unfamiliar day, would be overwhelming and unsettle them even further.

Does anyone have advice on helping them to settle? Would you attend the wedding, or just send one of the parents alone?

AIBU if just the sibling parent attends?

OP posts:
Hercisback1 · 11/06/2025 11:23

800 miles is crazy, can you fly?

CountryQueen · 11/06/2025 11:21

So you said you’d go when you were 700 miles away but now you’re 800 miles away you won’t?

LIZS · 11/06/2025 11:20

You must have known you were moving when you accepted the invitation, presumably 100s miles away. Are there any alternative transport to ease it? They may be happy to see familiar relatives and realise they have not disappeared completely.

LateQuartet · 11/06/2025 11:17

Interested in how you phrase it -- 'we are expected to attend a close relative's wedding'. Well, sure you are, if you RSVP'd yes. The people getting married aren't doing anything unreasonable in expecting you to attend if you said you were, especially if, as it seems, the couple includes either your or your DH's sibling.

Yes, I think you should all go.

ThejoyofNC · 11/06/2025 11:14

The wedding is in 2 weeks so I presume you've RSVPd yes. You'd be pretty unreasonable to cancel now without a good reason. It sounds like you just CBA to go and are making excuses to be honest.

BangersAndGnash · 11/06/2025 11:13

Is there no other way to travel?

Family wedding, yes, but personally 800
miles each way with small kids? No!

But going to a family wedding with their parents? Yes I would do that.

SeventeenClovesOfGarlic · 11/06/2025 11:12

Can the person related to the couple go alone? Are there no flights? A 1600 mile drive is wild. How many days of driving would that be?

heldinadream · 11/06/2025 11:10

Your children's well being and the recent disruption to their lives from the move is more important than any wedding, no matter who it is. Do what you feel is best for them.
Anyone who objects is just self-centred.

AMillionTomorrows · 11/06/2025 11:07

I think you should go but I understand why you don’t want to.