To not understand people who don't love food

I do really love food. A lot.

But I do find it off putting when people use over-effusive language about their own appetites and the food they “fancy” etc. Maybe your DH is the same?

Maybe other things bring them joy 🤣 saves them obesity and health issues I guess

We’re all different, thank goodness

I used to love food and kind of still do. But have on and off digestive issues for a while now which sometimes makes eating hard if I don't want to feel ill afterwards. A while ago I had a couple of months where I could barely eat enough to keep me going through the day and lost a lot of weight, the smell of other people's food made me feel sick. So I guess I can understand both sides of it now 🤣

Food can be a sensitive thing for some people and a major issue.

I have issues around food.

Over my life, I have either loved it (too much!) or I have felt disgusted by it (anorexia). Food is a ways to control peoples lives in some instances.

I am still trying to find that balance, even now.

Also, since the cost of living crisis, food shopping and organising/planning meals does not bring much joy any more when you can no longer buy what you want, rather what you need.

Oh Do jog on! I find joy in other places. I like a nice meal as much as the next person I just don’t think about food all day. News alert, not everyone is like you. That doesn’t make them better or worse.

It's important to understand that often people like different things to you and that is fine. It's part of growing up.

The world would be a pretty boring place if we all liked the same stuff.

Strange thing to say.

Maybe we find more interesting stuff to talk about.

Can people love food without listing every ingredient in every dish they've ever eaten? It's tedious.

Food is fuel’ types are joyless drones.

You really meant to be that rude, didn't you?

No they aren’t joyless drones, god this is so rude!

Putting food related trauma aside, I agree with you op. The variety of food we have and the enjoyment you can get from it is a gift from the Gods. ‘Food is fuel’ types are joyless drones.

I agree that food is interesting to some, not to others, and all in-between. And of course, like with music, some people are indfferent to music, some love music-to listen to, others love it, and also create it-food is like that.

I love cooking. And I have always been naturally very good at it. When me and my ex were skint many years ago she used to marvel that I could create a meal out of the few bits and bats we had in the freezer/cupboard. An ideal day for me is spent cooking and creating and learning new recipes. Definitely my creative outlet.

The trouble is, I live by myself. The last day I cooked, I made a huge lasagne but with different flavours to I'd normally use, omitting some allergens. It was by all accounts delicious-by all accounts because there's nobody here to appreciate, enjoy or even sample my cooking. If I do enjoy myself in the kitchen, It's for what-the freezer? I have been doing this sort of thing since I were a child but now, it has to get distributed to friends/family members who don't really want it, they'll take it and appreciate it but it isn't the same. Sometimes it feels a bit 'sad' that I'll make a new recipe and then whoever I next speak to 'Oh I've made a XYZ, would you like some?' I am inevitably met with questions about why TF I've slaved about in the kitchen for hours with nobody to feed.

It feels like pity.

I was one of the ones forced to eat when I didn't want to as a small child, many bad memories-and then I became very overweight as a child/young teen following being bullied-eating so much chocolate, whole adult pizzas to myself, whole four packs of desserts- -losing it in my later teens and becoming eating disordered for years, lowest point being very underweight until my early twenties, and then becoming quite fat again.

FF to now and I am slim and toned thanks to exercise and low-carb/high protein-but this means that I also 'cannot' eat my own food that I cook.

Having said that, I do love food. I have diet friendly foods in the house that I love and although it has become very 'samey' I do like what I eat and look forward to meals.

I definitely can still be comforted by food.
Apologies-I know a few people have given personal accounts of where they stand on this topic but mine has been one of the longest!

https://www.theguardian.com/food/2022/nov/05/i-have-never-eaten-cucumber-onion-or-an-egg-can-i-cure-my-extreme-food-phobias

Maybe not for your DH given the background to his food ideas. But for picky eaters I found this interesting.

Anyway I can look in the fridge/cupboard and always make something nice for lunch. My DH will look in the same places and say 'God, there's nothing in for lunch'. He lacks imagination where food is concerned.

Just reading the OP stressed me out. I’m autistic and have ARFID. Like others I was force-fed as a child, or punished if I didn’t eat. I hate the physical sensations of chewing and swallowing. Different textures make me gag. People who are obsessed with food like the OP are incredibly problematic for me and bring up loads of childhood trauma.

OP - your husband had negative experiences with food as a child, so why on earth did you write a post disingenuously wondering why he doesn’t love food the way you do? It’s obvious why he doesn’t!

It doesn't have to be all or nothing. I enjoy a nice meal as much as the next person but that doesn't mean that if I am WFH I am going to have a gourmet lunch everyday.

Me too, none of this is unusual or worthy of comment in those countries and many others, people talk about food all day long, where its from, how you cooked it, how your mother cooked it, why arent you serving it with this or that, are you serving it with this and that, whats going to happen later etc etc

Also chefs, this is why they are chefs and for those of us who arent chefs, its the same premise, planning, creating, thinking about flavours textures, mixtures, combinations, techniques etc etc

Ha I'm with you OP and my DH is the same as yours. I feel like he is missing out on some of the great pleasures of life, but to him preparing food is just a boring / stressful faff and he wants absolutely nothing to do with leftovers.

I nurse a fantasy that he will one day get therapy to unpick all the criticism & belittling he received as a child which makes him scared to make mistakes or try anything new, and we will then be able to share a new enjoyment of food. In the meantime I keep the freezer stocked with pizzas so he won't starve if I go out for the evening.

I’m like that now that I’ve stopped eating carbs. I’m glad though as being obsessed with food is not healthy. I eat when I’m hungry, that’s it

I don't care about food one way or the other. I enjoy it sometimes, but I'd ever bother eating for pleasure.

I don’t agree with your first statement. I love food and am not malnourished at all and have never had a an eating disorder. I just love food, eating, planning what to make for meals and I love eating the way OP eats - plates of salad with loads of bits.

I do realise my username contradicts what I’ve said above 😂

im sorry you had an eating disorder 💐

I'm with you OP. I love food. I enjoy trying new meals, looking at recipes, wandering around food stalls, looking in shop windows - bakeries especially. If I won the lottery I'd open up a coffee shop and fill it with homemade baked goods ☕️ 🍪🍰

But didn't you know that there are 365 ways to serve bacalhau? What could be more varied than that? 😂
My husband tried to persuade me to have pig's ear at our wedding but I had to draw the line on that one.

I don’t really love food. If I could take a tablet that gave me all the nutrition I needed, I would be more than happy with that.

I sometimes dream about have a pic line straight into my intestines so I don’t have to eat at all. But I do have ARFID.

My DH loves food but is basically too lazy to have anything more exciting than a ham or cheese sandwich.
He always looks aghast at my fancy salad concoctions.