Mums partner 6 yrs want's her to lend him all her life saving for a loan to buy larger house she won't be on deed for.

Does she cook for him? Keep the house nice and clean? Bet she arranges the holidays. Feeds the pets. Remembers the birthday cards. Sorts the car and house insurance? How about paying the bills and doing the shopping? Books GP appointments? Maybe she’s simply so grateful for his generosity she clips his toenails?
And this is all in exchange for what, a roof?

Youre saying 'their' house sale, but it is his house sale, even though she lives there, if he refuses to put her on the deeds - which I would understand if all DC were from previous relationships, but they have a DS together - that's more of a commitment than marriage! How old is your brother, is he an adult?

If he's able to say no to putting your mum on the house deeds because of complications then your mum should be able to say no to this loan because it leaves her in a very precarious position

She's being financially abused and a solicitor's advice is needed now because financial boundaries need to be put in place to safeguard her future.

Your mum's lifesaving need ring fencing immediately and put in a long term deposit account solely in her name. If she lends him the money then do it via a solicitor and make sure she puts a charge on the house so she has a claim to the deposit if sold. But I wouldn't even advise this, she needs to keep her finances separate from him and live independently. He's a shark who has spotted a financial opportunity for himself by exploiting your mum. Your mum should also write a will leaving him out of it and naming her family instead.

https://www.moneyhelper.org.uk/en/family-and-care/talk-money/financial-abuse-spotting-the-signs-and-leaving-safely

My money would come with my name on the house.
I don't know how easy / difficult these things are but I would suggest they agree to put the house in both their names and then change that when he has the funds to repay her money, OR they have a legal agreement drawn up for the loan to be repaid asap and a will for it to be repaid in the event of his death, or he's incapacitated in some way.

No way would I agree it's just handed over with nothing formal. It's far too much money to lose.

There's that sort of saying isn't there, don't loan what you're not prepared to lose.
No one knows the future, not worth the risk.

He won’t put her on the deeds? So she’d basically be lending him money for a house for HIM?
Absolutely fucking not!
Tell her to give her head a wobble and tell him to fuck off with that idea.

They could easily buy as tenants in common with the shares reflecting what they have put in and then have wills to reflect where it goes

exaxtly where is he paying her back from anyway

will she/they listen to you and get proper legal advice - work out what they want - her the money and him the ability to leave his share to his children?

because otherwise it just looks like he is scamming her badly (and as it happens you as an adult child out of your inheritance)

Absolutely not. What if she were to do this and he dropped dead? The money would then be in his estate. All sorts of things that could go horribly wrong here.

Let him get a bank loan, like anyone else. Its a shame he knows about her finances.

This. Worst case scenarios do happen. He buys house with her money, drops dead from a heart attack, house is inherited by his children.
Absolutely crazy to do this, and if he is too stupid to see the risks to her, or too lacking in love to want to protect her interests, then he is not at all as “nice” as he seems !

House sale chains fall through all the time - its annoying and stressful but that's life. If he misses out on the house he wants, so be it. There'll be other stuff come on the market soon enough. He shouldn't pass this stress on your Mum, expecting her to come and save him because she has the means to, and not even put her on the deeds! Was there any mention of paying her interest? I doubt it.

Fuck that. He can get a bridging loan or go back to house hunting.

NO

I was the fool who did this 35 years ago, in eerily similar circumstances. I lost my money.

Suggest you see a solicitor and get something proper in writing.

If it was 5k and she would benefit from the arrangement and could afford to lose it then fair enough. If it’s £250k no way and don’t trust him.

If she wants to do this, surely it has to be documented as a registered charge on the old house, so that the on its sale, the the funds are released to her by the solicitor as part of the completion. She would still be exposed if he changed his mind about selling the house and in that situation would be reliant on him paying back st the end of the loan term or otherwise having to ennfirxe the charge, which seems unlikely to do

OP please update us saying this isn’t happening! I feel so bad for your mum, this is the most manipulative person and he needs out of her life

Fuck no! She’d be absolutely crackers to do this!

And tbh, if he truly had her best interests at heart he wouldn’t even ask or put her in that position

Also, the fact you have to say "but he's a really nice guy" tells you how bad this deal is

More red flags than a Beijing parade…

Your Mum's partner won't marry her, because it's 'too complicated with his adult children', yet has asked her to loan him her life savings???!!! A big fat No. She's good enough to borrow money from but not good enough to marry. Bloody cheek quite frankly.

No no no

Christ no!! No way she should ever do this.

The only way your mother would have any security is if the money is protected by a legal charge on the property - assuming there is no other lender who has priority over her loan.

There are lots of ways otherwise that this could go wrong even if the partner doesn’t necessarily intend that. First off, he could die and then if the loan is not a secured debt it will be hard to get it back. Or he could suffer a horrible illness/injury and “just” need a bit more of the money for a bit longer……. Or something similar could happen to one of his wider family and she’s pressured to hold back with the return of her money til that person is helped etc etc.

No, no, no and a hell no. Absolutely not. How on earth can he think it’s okay to protect his children’s inheritance by not marrying her or putting her on the deeds (fine if they’re both happy with that) but not to protect herself and her own children by putting her money at risk.
If she did it it should be strictly done legally with a solicitor drawing up paperwork saying it’s a loan and when it needs to be repaid by, but even then I don’t know how secure that would be. He just should wait and buy a new house when he’s able to. Way too risky on your mums part, no matter how much she trusts him. That’s a huge huge amount to trust anyone with.

Isn’t this what bridging loans are for?
She absolutely should not do this. How does he even know she has this money if she’s not allowed to know his financial situation?
It’s all fine and well not sharing money, but they have 6yrs and a child together and he doesn’t even discuss the financial situation with her?
If he doesn’t trust her then he’s not trustworthy. If he feels such a high need to protect himself then he’s needs protected from. Judge people by their own standards.