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Original poster

My mum is jealous !

57 replies

OneAquaEagle90 · 07/06/2025 11:53

I am 32 and thinking about buying a small 1 bed flat I have no kids , no partner and I am in a position I have saved my money. Most people around me have brought there home including my mum every time I talk about buying a home she gets so angry and leaves the room , my bother who's 42 she keeps talking about helping him buy a home its like she's jealous. I cant understand it someone please let me know this is not one or two comments she has done this for years.

OP posts:
Elsvieta · 07/06/2025 12:02

It's probably because few women of her generation ever lived alone or bought a home alone (depending on her age, it might have been literally impossible - some mortgage lenders wouldn't lend to single women, once upon a time). Either she just couldn't do it or it never really seemed feasible to her because of societal expectations etc. And so now, yes, she's jealous. I've seen this a few times - older women who seem angered by the choices of younger women to choose to go into certain careers / work abroad / choose not to marry / choose not to have children etc. The older women didn't feel free to make the same choices when they were young - they were expected to marry young, have children, be homemakers etc and although it was obviously not against the law to rebel against expectations, the world they lived in made it very difficult (eg because it was harder for a woman to get a job that made enough money to live independently). And they do sometimes take out their anger about that on the wrong person.

Poopeepoopee · 07/06/2025 12:00

"she has done this for years."

Does this mean you've been talking about it for years?

If so, like all the others say, stop talking about it and actually do it. No need to discuss it with her.

ZekeZeke · 07/06/2025 11:57

Do you live with her? Maybe she is worried about living alone?
Regardless, she should be happy for you, but I would keep your business to yourself, she is sucking the joy out of your happy news.
Congratulations, just buy it!

ColinCaterpillarsNo1Fan · 07/06/2025 11:57

Stop talking about your future plans with your mum and get on with it.

Renabrook · 07/06/2025 11:56

babystarsandmoon · 07/06/2025 11:54

Stop talking about it and just do it.

Well this otherwise it feels you are attention seeking

Juat get on with it

Idratherreadabookthanks · 07/06/2025 11:55

Go for it - your own home, how exciting! You've worked hard for this, you deserve it. Enjoy it.

Do you live with your mum ATM? Is she concerned about being left on her own?

babystarsandmoon · 07/06/2025 11:54

Stop talking about it and just do it.

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