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Original poster

Formal School Complaint - AIBU

281 replies

Schoolproblemsagain · 06/06/2025 20:58

NC

Yesterday, I finally submitted a formal
complaint to my DS secondary school.

It has been a long time coming, but I’m having a major panic that I’ve done the wrong thing and they will treat my younger DS differently.

AIBU to have complained?

I won’t go into all the background details as it’s too long, but the catalyst for finally raising a formal is as follows:

DS Year 11, in the midst of his GCSE’s, has an EHCP and a Pupil Profile. ASD Diagnosis.

School phoned me and said:

At lunchtime, two boys were throwing food at him, he told them to fuck off, he was asked to leave the lunch hall, he refused. He explained to the teacher that he would not leave as he hadn’t done anything wrong and food was being thrown at him. This then escalated to three teachers within his space, who were asking him to leave. He was still refusing. He has been suspended for disruption and is not allowed to return to school unless to sit an exam.

The two boys, who were throwing food and their entourage, who were laughing, have received no punishment.

His EHCP and Pupil Profile states that he will not manage public confrontation with strategies on how to manage such events.

AIBU to have raised a complaint on the grounds that his EHCP and Pupil Profile were not followed, that he has been punished when the other students have not and that he is now missing vital support sessions during his GCSE’s?

OP posts:
Darkgreendarkbark · 06/06/2025 21:09

converseandjeans · 06/06/2025 21:07

Sorry but in ‘real life’ you would not be expected to put up with having food thrown at you & a group taking the piss. I often open up threads about schools & despair. But I agree with OP on this one. They need to sort the bullies out.

Show quote history

Both should be dealt with.

Pupils shouldn't throw food.

Pupils shouldn't swear at each other.

Pupils should accept the direction and punishments given by teachers, e.g. told to leave the lunch hall after doing either of the above.

LarkAscendings · 06/06/2025 21:09

Darkgreendarkbark · 06/06/2025 21:03

They surely can't be having pupils telling others to "fuck off". What do you expect the school to do? Take everything else out of it, they can't show other pupils that it's ok to tell each other to fuck off (if you have the right paperwork).

They surely can’t have kids throwing food at other kids who have autism (or at all)? No expectations for the school for that?

converseandjeans · 06/06/2025 21:07

Darkgreendarkbark · 06/06/2025 21:03

They surely can't be having pupils telling others to "fuck off". What do you expect the school to do? Take everything else out of it, they can't show other pupils that it's ok to tell each other to fuck off (if you have the right paperwork).

Sorry but in ‘real life’ you would not be expected to put up with having food thrown at you & a group taking the piss. I often open up threads about schools & despair. But I agree with OP on this one. They need to sort the bullies out.

Littlefish · 06/06/2025 21:06

If you feel that the exclusion is as a result of his SEND then you can challenge it. The information on how to do this should on the paperwork you received.

LittleHangleton · 06/06/2025 21:05

You definitely don't know the outcomes for other students. These are confidential and would never be shared with you. The outcomes for other chikdren is not relevant to your son.

Darkgreendarkbark · 06/06/2025 21:03

They surely can't be having pupils telling others to "fuck off". What do you expect the school to do? Take everything else out of it, they can't show other pupils that it's ok to tell each other to fuck off (if you have the right paperwork).