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Original poster

What to do with house-inheritance?

106 replies

Inheritancequery1 · 06/06/2025 19:56

I’m buying a house with my DP. I have dc from a previous relationship. On my death they will receive practically 800k in insurance policies and death in service. So this leaves the question…do I buy the house as joint tenants or tenants in common? I’m so torn 😅 help

OP posts:
Original poster
Inheritancequery1 · 07/06/2025 20:00

MyNamedoesntWork · 07/06/2025 19:59

Because you don’t have a crystal ball to tell you that everything will be the same by the time the first of you dies.

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I’m thinking the mutual will would be more something we write later on in life…

OP posts:
MyNamedoesntWork · 07/06/2025 19:59

Inheritancequery1 · 07/06/2025 19:57

But why would that be a problem if we both agree to what we want to happen to the house/money after second death

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Because you don’t have a crystal ball to tell you that everything will be the same by the time the first of you dies.

Original poster
Inheritancequery1 · 07/06/2025 19:59

So for example a mutual will where the house is left to the other person. And on death of second person it goes to person x, y and z

OP posts:
Original poster
Inheritancequery1 · 07/06/2025 19:57

MyNamedoesntWork · 07/06/2025 19:55

And that’s where the problems arise……..

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But why would that be a problem if we both agree to what we want to happen to the house/money after second death

OP posts:
MyNamedoesntWork · 07/06/2025 19:55

Inheritancequery1 · 07/06/2025 19:52

As far as I can read mutual wills cannot be changed after first death.

And that’s where the problems arise……..

Original poster
Inheritancequery1 · 07/06/2025 19:55

I think like people are saying this is something we will revisit as time goes by, my partner is aware of this and we both want fairness. As it stands right now, my dc will be more than looked after monetarily on my death. So I think it’s fair my partner gets the house. However if things change drastically job wise etc then we can revisit and change as necessary and again as they get older we will look at how things best divide up.

OP posts:
MyNamedoesntWork · 07/06/2025 19:54

Inheritancequery1 · 07/06/2025 19:50

A mutual will is different to a mirror will I thought…

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Sorry, you’re right.
we will not write mutual Wills as they have the potential to cause immense problems as if circumstances change your Will doesn’t.
Much easier to do TIC

Original poster
Inheritancequery1 · 07/06/2025 19:52

As far as I can read mutual wills cannot be changed after first death.

OP posts:
Original poster
Inheritancequery1 · 07/06/2025 19:50

MyNamedoesntWork · 07/06/2025 19:48

Yes, just because you write mirror wills doesn’t mean you can’t change your Will at a later date.
Again getting married will require you to write new wills.

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A mutual will is different to a mirror will I thought…

OP posts:
MyNamedoesntWork · 07/06/2025 19:48

Inheritancequery1 · 07/06/2025 19:45

Even if they are mutual wills?

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Yes, just because you write mirror wills doesn’t mean you can’t change your Will at a later date.
Again getting married will require you to write new wills.

Allseeingallknowing · 07/06/2025 19:48

MyNamedoesntWork · 07/06/2025 19:44

No, if you are joint tenants, on first death the property immediately belongs to the joint owner.
That means that the remaining owner can leave the house to whoever they want.
If you write wills as you suggest, you can both change your wills at any time.

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She did say the house would go to the children on the second death, so yes, the OP can do what she suggests

MyNamedoesntWork · 07/06/2025 19:45

Inheritancequery1 · 07/06/2025 19:16

No we are not married, but we will eventually be

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Also, remember any will you write now will be void once you marry, you will need to make another Will post marriage.

Original poster
Inheritancequery1 · 07/06/2025 19:45

MyNamedoesntWork · 07/06/2025 19:44

No, if you are joint tenants, on first death the property immediately belongs to the joint owner.
That means that the remaining owner can leave the house to whoever they want.
If you write wills as you suggest, you can both change your wills at any time.

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Even if they are mutual wills?

OP posts:
MyNamedoesntWork · 07/06/2025 19:44

Inheritancequery1 · 07/06/2025 19:02

Can we write this into a will in advance, can we be joint tenants and then state that on both deaths the house goes to dc?

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No, if you are joint tenants, on first death the property immediately belongs to the joint owner.
That means that the remaining owner can leave the house to whoever they want.
If you write wills as you suggest, you can both change your wills at any time.

SoSoLong · 07/06/2025 19:36

You can change from joint tenants to tenants in common and the other way around, but why bother? Just go for tenants in common and then you can choose whom to leave your share to in your will. You can easily change your will, you never know what the future holds and what needs your adult children will have.

Original poster
Inheritancequery1 · 07/06/2025 19:32

Pleasealexa · 07/06/2025 19:26

£150k won't be worth as much in 20 years.

When a person dies the way they structure their will takes on emotional value. From the outside it would appear you are leaving more to your partner, over your children and potential grandchildren.

If he invest 50% then let that share remain with him, the rest to your children.

But i understand what you are saying completely.

OP posts:
Original poster
Inheritancequery1 · 07/06/2025 19:32

Pleasealexa · 07/06/2025 19:26

£150k won't be worth as much in 20 years.

When a person dies the way they structure their will takes on emotional value. From the outside it would appear you are leaving more to your partner, over your children and potential grandchildren.

If he invest 50% then let that share remain with him, the rest to your children.

In 20years my dc will be in their late 30’s and will have been hopefully put through university and I will have helped them with buying a house if I’m still in a position to do so (as I am now) they will also stand to inherit from their dad (who has a lot too) I want it to be fair believe me, fair for everyone. My DP will only have his home. That’s it. They will have inheritance from two well off parents and they will be in their 30’s/40’s. 150k is a nice little windfall whichever way it happens, it’s more than I stand to inherit 🤣🤣

OP posts:
Original poster
Inheritancequery1 · 07/06/2025 19:28

So if we choose tenants in common now we can change it to joint tenants if we want or vice versa? Or like you say if I lose my job I can change it then?

OP posts:
Pleasealexa · 07/06/2025 19:26

£150k won't be worth as much in 20 years.

When a person dies the way they structure their will takes on emotional value. From the outside it would appear you are leaving more to your partner, over your children and potential grandchildren.

If he invest 50% then let that share remain with him, the rest to your children.

SoSoLong · 07/06/2025 19:25

Tenants in common and leave him your share in a will for now. If you lose your job or just change your mind later, you can easily change your will in your children's favour.

MadamCholetsbonnet · 07/06/2025 19:24

if he wishes

Original poster
Inheritancequery1 · 07/06/2025 19:16

ColinCaterpillarsNo1Fan · 07/06/2025 19:11

Are you married? Either way whether you are or not, buy the house as tenants in common. Then get a trust will done and leave everything to your children. This way their inheritance is secured & your dp can leave his estate to whomever he wants.

No we are not married, but we will eventually be

OP posts:
wednesday32 · 07/06/2025 19:13

Also consider that inheritance tax will need to be paid on that value estate because you are not married.

ColinCaterpillarsNo1Fan · 07/06/2025 19:11

Are you married? Either way whether you are or not, buy the house as tenants in common. Then get a trust will done and leave everything to your children. This way their inheritance is secured & your dp can leave his estate to whomever he wants.

Original poster
Inheritancequery1 · 07/06/2025 19:08

HomeTheatreSystem · 07/06/2025 19:07

You've not said how old your children are, nor your ages. It is wise to revisit your will every few years to ensure it is still relevant and/or covers a material change of circumstances affecting any of you. You can change the house ownership from joint tenants to tenants in common if you wish. It's not fixed in stone. HOWEVER, it is best that you seek legal advice on this. It doesn't need to get complicated but you should understand the implications of decisions you make now. A solicitor will be able to guide you.

Do not rely on your DP leaving the house to your kids upon his death. He may very well meet someone else after you pass and forget all about his promises to you.

They are 12 and 9 right now.

OP posts: