To be absolutely fuming with MIL and DH over this?

Next time if she walks through the door leave and go to your friend overnight. Let them enjoy “the family time” 😉

Come back in the morning,sit down like Lady Muck and have a go at pair of them about the state of the kitchen and lack of nappies

I would be raging if my DH did this and I get on with / Like my MIL...can't imagine how much more rage inducing this would be with a MIL who makes digs about parenting etc

@Discoveni holy shit, I honestly have no words…
she turns with slippers and stays the night cos he can’t buy nappies ?!?!? ……..

My flabber has been truly gasted!!

so you need a break and instead he brings you an overnight guest? That's worse than the subs from Asda

LT pathetic mummy’s B

Bloody hell OP, I'd be raging. I sincerely hope you've left all the bedding sorting for him to do.

I think she wasn't telling him he needed permission, more he needs to give her the heads up. If my DH brought anyone home after he's walked the dogs, for example, I'd be fuming. Bra is off, dishes done, surfaces cleared, I'm chilling and in the bath. I do not want unexpected guests.

You were very unreasonable not to use his favourite shirt as a makeshift nappy whilst he returned to do the errand he’d been asked to do 2 hours previous!

YANBU obvs, but I would like to commend you on your amazing one liners “in her pyjamas and flipping slippers like it’s a spa weekend” 🤣

I would deal with this honestly and directly,

e.g “MIL I gather you think I have been snappy lately and think I need a break and more family time. This is true. And last night you may have found me less welcoming than usual. I need to let you know that I had been waiting for DH to get back with nappies, an errand that should have taken 15 minutes. He was gone for over 2 hours without explanation, and returned without the nappies once I had put the kids to bed single handed. The truth is that by 9pm I am not able to rise to the occasion of unexpected visitors or overnight guests. “

"She sits on the sofa acting like Lady Muck, making hints about how “we need more family time”

What does she mean by this? Does family time mean sex? Or more time with her?

"and how she’s “worried about the kids not getting enough routine” (?!). "

So she decides to come and wreck the routine! 🙄

Sounds like your H has been bitching to her about you, OP.

I’m close to my sons actually. But then they are capable fathers who don’t come crying to me because they’ve been asked ti do some basic parenting.

I’d be livid and I’m happy that dh is close to his mum. Just don’t invite someone e over for the night without telling me, just like I wouldn’t do.
I hoped you made it clear to him that it’s not happening again.

Do adults really have sleepovers when there’s no need? Unless you’re staying over from far away or babysitting then what is the point? Really sounds like he just dragged his mother over to cause annoyance. I wouldn’t have disturbed DC to let her sleep in their room. She would have been offered the sofa or going home.

Phew... noww I'm knackered it's been a looong day but if my dh had turned up without the nappies and lunch box makings I'd specifically sent him to Asda for I'd be frustrated... but to then turn up with a guest without reason who he then had to turf a kid out their room on a school night... nah he'd be getting g earache and frankly she would also know she was adding to the burdenof the evening.

He went to get nappies and brought his Mum back instead.

Didn't want to cause a scene? That's grounds for justifiable homicide.

OMG I think this would have sent me completely ffling interstellar at both of them and hang the consequences. I'd have certainly told him to take her home immediately, to stay there and seriously consider whether he wants to stay married.

she starts going on about how I’m “too snappy lately” and maybe I “need a break” and next thing he’s inviting her to ours for the night!

Who needs a break-you?

How is this giving you a break?

Next time go get the nappies yourself and make sure to stop off at the pub on your way home.

Absolutely this. I'd be raging too

I wouldn't be happy either and he should have let you know where he was/what he was doing. However, could he be genuinely worried about her? Can see why you are upset though, just trying to understand his behaviour.

I'd have been furious too. Is this weaponised fuckwittwery?

Of course he can support his mother, but to suddenly just bring her back and dump her on you and the kids isn't on. It upset everyone's routines and clearly should have been discussed first. It wasn't, so he shouldn't have done it. His mother is no better if she can't see that either!

I'd also have read him the riot act about not getting the nappies and sent him back out to Asda for them.

An uninvited overnight guest would make me stabby let alone snappy! You’re not BU op.

You don't just disappear for ages and then turn up with your mum, saying that she's going to stay the night without checking with your wife/partner first. This MIL sounds critical and interfering and certainly not helpful.