To never tell partner I love him?

Oh wow! 😂

OMG why are strangers here so invested in forcing the OP to conform to their ideas about relationships?!

Sorry people are so insane, OP 💐 I highly doubt anyone taking the time to message you that has a happy life themselves…

Even people who are uncomfortable verbally expressing their feelings will have said I love you to their partner who they're in love with, at least once.

To not do so is extremely odd, in the sense of being unusual/uncommon, and in the sense of being weird.

I guess we read it differently then, I
Or have different ideas of what deep and loving mean perhaps

It reads like they have a deep loving committed relationship to me.

Except not living together and being less verbally expressive of their emotions than you think they should be.

Er, I'm not telling other people their relationships are not relationships because they differ from mine.

You didn’t merely say it was odd (in your opinion.)

You said people who love each other will say that. You cannot say that. You can only speak for yourself.

Some people are simply more at ease verbally expressing their emotions than others.

It is odd, is what I'm saying. And it is.

It's less odd in cultures where people don't marry for love. There it would be considered normal to never say you love your partner - probably because you don't, really, and it's not the point of the relationship.

But I'm assuming OP and her partner have not been forced together by their families, or betrothed to one another for reasons of convenience, so yes, in this case, it is odd.

She sees him only at the weekend despite living close by, they plan holidays and movies but seemingly nothing more, they don't tell each other they love each other, she's not entirely sure how he feels about living together or marriage, everything is vague.

Not living together doesn't mean it's not just dating but all those other things, that is very much dating or a casual relationship. It lacks the emotional trappings of anything more.

I was with my husband 10 yrs before we married we were much more than dating. I could however have told you his feelings on most subjects, we DID discuss how we felt, in detail, our plans for the future went way beyond where to holiday to next. You don't have to live together or be married to be in a serious relationship but op sounds like she is 5 yrs into dating albeit monogamous

These people who feel they have to minimise other people’s experiences because they do things differently to them are pathetic.

I imagine you’re one of those who thinks that a relationship isn’t valid unless you live together, the type who would start a thread along the lines of “he’s not your partner, he’s your boyfriend.”

newsflash, you’re wrong.

Firstly, you clearly don’t actually understand the meaning of the word “dating” if you think that not living together only means dating. People don’t live together for a variety of reasons. I don’t live with my partner and we’ve been together for twelve years. For logistical reasons living together hasn’t been possible, but twelve years on it works for me, and many others for that matter, to have my space during the week and see him at weekends as he works in another city so is there during the week. That’s not dating, it’s a relationship. He’s my partner just as much as he would be if he lived with me permanently. No “dating” involved there, and we’ve been through life experiences which most people never will. If you feel the need to minimise that to satisfy your own need to feel that a relationship where you don’t live together isn’t valid then that’s on you, not the people whose relationships don’t fit your criteria.

Secondly,if partner is defined only by living together, then surely that means that if you move some bloke in after the first date, he becomes your partner, even if that means you know nothing about each other compared to a relationship which has been ongoing for several years but where the couple don’t live together for their own valid reasons. I don’t think so.

You do know there are actual married couples who don’t live together don’t you? Does that make their marriage less valid? No of course it doesn’t.

I’m sorry you feel so insecure in your own relationship that you feel such a need to belittle others’ just to make yourself feel superior.

Then what are you doing?

I don't, not at all, I do think the way op talks about her partner makes her seem emotionally stunted and not properly I vested, or not sure he is. And the defensiveness.

It sounds very much like they go on a date each weekend, have sex and go on holidays together. It sounds lovely but it's not particularly deep is it?

You cannot speak for the entire planet.

Nah. People who are both in love say it, at least once, to each other.

Why do you think not wishing to live with a partner / not being bothered by marriage means being less invested

People who are in love tell each other how they feel about one another.

I mean it happens all the time that people love each other and don’t express it directly with words.. like as OP explained with her parents, I’m sure they loved her, just some people are reserved or awkward about saying it for example

There were 9 pages of single line responses, I read to page 5, I already said that.

Ok I think you would benefit from counselling. I hope you are able to heal.