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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Husband's sibling booking daughter's christening on my birthday, AIBU to be annoyed?

214 replies

OneZingyKhakiSnake · 05/06/2025 22:21

Ideally we would like to actually go out for the day somewhere for my birthday as we have young children ourselves. Its not until autumn, the child is going to be nearly 2. Church and function afterwards. They are not religious in any way.

OP posts:
Enthusiasticcarrotgrower · 06/06/2025 07:20

Amelie2025 · 06/06/2025 06:51

MN removed it because it was causing too much trouble with some posters using it to be nasty to others.

organised bullying too.

so the few spoilt it for everyone else!

although it was new, I miss it.

There's a thread asking for it back, but I'm in 2 minds. People were really being nasty with it & it was causing MN a lot of extra work

Show quote history

I think we need the shocked reaction they have on Facebook. I would use it a lot.

Rewis · 06/06/2025 07:15

If you have plans for the day, you don't have to attend the christening.

That being said, my husbands brothers wife's birthday would not be a consideration when picking a date.

Koalafan · 06/06/2025 07:12

Another indulged child grows up into an interesting adult.
YABVVVU.

justkeepswimingswiming · 06/06/2025 07:10

dont go if you dont want too, its a christening not a summons.

Dweetfidilove · 06/06/2025 07:07

Paperumbrella · 05/06/2025 22:22

Didn’t expect to find the centre of the universe of Mumsnet, but here we are.

😂

EmeraldShamrock000 · 06/06/2025 07:06

First World problems.
Grow up.

Pelicanos · 06/06/2025 07:04

Amelie2025 · 06/06/2025 06:51

MN removed it because it was causing too much trouble with some posters using it to be nasty to others.

organised bullying too.

so the few spoilt it for everyone else!

although it was new, I miss it.

There's a thread asking for it back, but I'm in 2 minds. People were really being nasty with it & it was causing MN a lot of extra work

Show quote history

I miss it but I’m glad it’s been removed. It was being used as a weapon which is not how it was intended to be used.

Pelicanos · 06/06/2025 06:59

Zanatdy · 06/06/2025 04:55

Fair play to you, you took it on the chin!

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I agree. Well done OP, some posters would not have returned but you did.

RedhairDL · 06/06/2025 06:53

I do know the dates of other people in my family and extended families birthdays, and I would never book something on those days. I think that’s just common decency personally.

However, I do book myself to do whatever I like regardless of anyone else’s birthday, so I’m rarely about for most people’s. We are normally away all summer, or at least 5 weeks and we’ve missed weddings, birthdays, christenings the lot. People know when they book that we’ll be abroad, so that’s their choice.

I don’t think the world stops for me, or anyone else, so my feelings are just do as you please. If you’ve got other plans for your birthday, and they particularly wanted you at the Christening, well that’s their error.

beAsensible1 · 06/06/2025 06:52

Fgs

Amelie2025 · 06/06/2025 06:51

Floatlikeafeather2 · 06/06/2025 00:46

Yeah, where has it gone and why?

Show quote history

MN removed it because it was causing too much trouble with some posters using it to be nasty to others.

organised bullying too.

so the few spoilt it for everyone else!

although it was new, I miss it.

There's a thread asking for it back, but I'm in 2 minds. People were really being nasty with it & it was causing MN a lot of extra work

Redwinemaestro · 06/06/2025 06:48

How old are you? 5?

Enthusiasticcarrotgrower · 06/06/2025 06:46

I don’t actually know either of my brother in laws’ birthdays off the top of my head. I know the month but not the day. It wouldn’t even cross my mind to make plans around those dates.

Lilactimes · 06/06/2025 06:40

OneZingyKhakiSnake · 05/06/2025 22:57

Hahahh! Wow I did not even think I'd get a reply let alone a battering 🙈 I love the brutal honesty on here. I guess y'all are right, I'll just have to wait a week and grow up!

😂😂😂 lovely response @OneZingyKhakiSnake
i was initially thinking you must be quite young as I’m always happy for an excuse to bury mine!

BendingSpoons · 06/06/2025 06:38

My sister was offered 3 dates for the christening. They couldn't do 1, so ranked the others 1 & 2. They got 2nd choice. It was our niece's 4th birthday. DB, DSIL & DN didn't go. My parents did go, and so missed DNs birthday. It wasn't ideal, but it wasn't done on purpose.

itsgettingweird · 06/06/2025 06:35

Paperumbrella · 05/06/2025 22:22

Didn’t expect to find the centre of the universe of Mumsnet, but here we are.

😂😂

dependent on church it can be very hard to get a christening date. Maybe this was one of a few dates left this year that they could do?

Unless there’s a huge backstory I doubt she thought “it’s OPs birthday on 19th October - let’s do it then!”

SandandSky · 06/06/2025 06:34

Our eldest was christened on Christmas Eve. If people weren’t happy about it we didn’t know - the turn out was great and it was a a lovely time

Saturdaybloodycleaner · 06/06/2025 06:33

I think it’s fine, just celebrate on another day. My husband and son had tickets to a concert this year (only day son’s fave band were playing in UK) so we all went out the day after. Really no big deal.

Starzinsky · 06/06/2025 06:29

You sound like a spoilt child.

MyLimeGuide · 06/06/2025 06:26

DoYouReally · 06/06/2025 00:09

Just make sure you wear your big birthday badge to the Christening- make sure everyone knows the day is really about you.

This is a perfect idea. Joking aside, well done OP for accepting your faults 👏

Twiglets1 · 06/06/2025 06:24

Paperumbrella · 05/06/2025 22:22

Didn’t expect to find the centre of the universe of Mumsnet, but here we are.

😂(I miss the "laugh" reaction on Mumsnet)

KindleAndCake · 06/06/2025 06:19

There We Are Then

ClearHoldBuild · 06/06/2025 06:19

I doubt my husband’s brother could tell you when my birthday is and likewise my siblings wouldn’t know what date is my husband birthday fell on. You can still do something in the evening. I take it you’re not going to be the godmother.

LaundryHepburn · 06/06/2025 06:16

Are you 12 years old?

RealPearlDuck · 06/06/2025 06:12

Are you annoyed because you didn't expect them to plan the christening on your birthday or is it because you'd possibly need to cancel your plans? If it's the former, then YABU. If it's the latter, then YANBU. Just say you have something else lined up and can't attend/can only drop in for a quick second.

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