Cancelling the kids plans because he's thrown a wobbler, aibu?

What a prick he is, letting you down as well as your kids!

I couldn't be bothered with him after this. Selfish twit he is.

From his message I definitely think he meant he still wanted to go away for the weekend, but just the two of you without the kids. So you may need to make it clear this morning that that isn't happening! It's way too late notice as well as being unfair on them obviously. I agree it doesn't bode well for his actions in future.

OP has said the planned location / activities were connected to her boyfriend’s job, so she can’t do the same thing with them.

You need to be loyal to your kids. Do not go if they can't go, no matter how good the trip is. They will rightly feel punished if you go and they don't. They will remember it forever.

This

So not only has he cancelled the day, he's also opted out of parenting? Nice ☹️.

A day at theme park sounds great. Your kids are going to love it!

Leave him to sulk. He doesn't want a kids weekend because of his DCs attitude so now you crack on and enjoy your day out without him because of his attitude.

You say to the children, “Mr X and his children aren’t coming away with us for the weekend anymore”, then you and your children go somewhere else fabulous and enjoy yourselves.

it sounds like he has form for this sort of thing, and you’ve forgiven it because it only impacted you. It’s inconsiderate behaviour, and doesn’t suggest much care for you. Want for yourself what you are angry about for your children; basic respect and courtesy.

What a thoughtless prick

You can’t be in a serious long term relationship with someone who behaves like that when there’s kids involved. No wonder he’s divorced.

Must be nice to be able to just opt out of parenting for a bit when your kids are playing you up, what a lucky boy.

Yeah he sounds hard work OP.

Looks like you’re finding out why he’s a part time dad in the first place…. Bin.

This guy is going to let you and your kids down when it really matters. You should seriously consider whether to end it (for your kids’ sake, if not yours, you probably should). Ultimately, you can’t rely on him…

Totally this!

He is obviously a but volatile. Maybe he’ll be back in track by tonight.

“I'm both angry and sad. He hasn't given any thought to everybody else impacted by his wobbler. It's fuck the lot of us.”

He’s not a keeper, OP, especially not if he has form for this sort of thing. You and your DC deserve better.

You say you are quite laid back. However you can be too soft and asy going. He is taking the piss! You have been dating a little over a year,he has already been flaky on a few occasions and bow this.I .

If his selfish tantrum and total lack of consideration for you and your kids (and his own) wasn’t enough to make me say dump him, the fact that he left you on read is. What an arrogant, selfish POS.

I hope you can have a good weekend with your boys, OP, and that losing this horrible man doesn’t sting too much — 16 months is a long time but the rest of your life is far longer. Get him binned x

I would be reevaluating the relationship. He sounds cold and selfish.

Good. I am glad you have woken up seeing this for what it is, and his true colours.

He will eventually ruin every single day op if you stay with this toad. Throwing tantrums on Christmas morning, ruining your children’s birthdays, family events, holidays. A life of abject misery and disappointment awaits you and your children as he will never ever put any of you first or care about the impact.

You have a golden opportunity to protect your children from this now. His poor children are saddled with him indefinitely, but yours are not.

I am assuming he only does 50/50 to save himself money and resents it very much by the sounds of it, and the amount of actual parenting he has to do. How awful.

Sadly I am the adult child of a man just like this. My father ruined everything because he couldn’t put anyone else first. He made no effort to parent. Constantly threw tantrums and created arguments out of nowhere. It was a terrible unstable environment to live in. We were constantly let down. Your children will grow to really hate him, as will his, and they will resent you with good reason for bringing him into your otherwise happy lives.

Even if he caves op I wouldn’t go this weekend, you know exactly who he is now. Don’t give him access to harm your children, in the way he is harming his.

What an inconsiderate arsehole I would just go with the kids and ditch him when you get back this will be your life going forward

I'm glad you are not letting your DC be disappointed, and REALLY happy that you are not going to give him a chance to do this again.

It is so annoying when someone thinks it's okay to torpedo a whole weekend that many are looking forward to doing because they are having a mad-on.

Go without him!!

So you're dumping him then?

Because he will do this again. He doesn't give a shit that he's ruined your kids weekend. Selfish arse.

He is very selfish. Incredibly selfish to hurt and upset your dc like this. I doubt his dc even did much to deserve this, it’s just he can’t be bothered and needs a me weekend.

The relationship is still new, you can bail out now without an issue, I suggest you take your chance. Now you know why he was single in the first place.