Fecking sports day

Can she chuck a shot put?

OP said her dd would hate to be let off taking part or to skip school so probably not much to be done about it.

Does she have to compete? Has she checked? Unless it's a really small school, likely there'll be some who don't take part and do the scoring or similar.

I do get where you're coming from, but you're completely wrong to think that other subjects in school aren't competitive or public. All subjects they study in school are competitive, with regular tests and exams once they are in secondary school. Many subjects are streamed, so it is very much public knowledge if you're good a maths/English/science etc. By the time they get to GCSE, there are higher and foundation level papers...

All children have to deal with this at some point, and for some kids like my oldest DC it's a daily experience of not being "good" at stuff in a very public way. At least he's sporty though, so on one single day he can do ok at school.

So while I agree with you, at least sports day is just one day, and it has no impact on your child's future. There's a much bigger issue with how academic subjects are taught and assessed.

I love the life message we are giving our children here.

If you dont like something, make up an excuse and avoid it. It may only be physical exercise but it will be a nice little behaviour they can carry into the rest of life. Dont like doing as they are told, dont like tidying their room, dont like getting a job, dont like........ I suppose it feeds all the threads on here when mothers are asking why their young adults are out of control. Its OK we can just blame it on some abbreviation such as sen (Undiagnosed of course)

My two hate sports day. Our primary school is very big on sporting achievements and they make a big fuss of the sporty kids. But the academic kids don't get the same praise and opportunities to shine and it winds me up. Sports teams it's always the fastest or most skilled to make sure they win. Inter house quiz it's the house captains and a handful of class ambassadors, not always the smartest kids. Because everyone has to have a chance but I don't think it's fair given the best kids are always chosen for sport. My eldest's teacher criticised my daughter at parents' night saying she's always the first with her hand up to answer questions and shes had to ask her a few times to not be so quick to stop making other kids feel bad. I asked if she got the fast kids to slow down at PE, knowing fine well they don't. I'm all for letting the fast kids run fast but let the clever kids be clever. Let the artistic kids have their pictures on display in pride of place and so on. I think all the forced participation in sports day (and public humiliation they might feel compared to peers) puts a lot of kids off sports for good. So I feel your pain OP!

We could do this at my school….in theory. The PE teachers used to threaten that if you didn’t put your name down for something then they might put you in for an event. Way to encourage bullying if you were crap at sports and therefore lost every event in your year group 🙄.

Oh dear, how sad 😂😂 Did they not spot the pattern?

One of my enduring memories of sports day in y7 is a classmate tactically dropping out of a 1k run by feigning sickness and me being coerced into taking her place by the teacher. I walked the entire route and caused a huge delay as I ambled around (I still can't run!).

I was however excellent at the javelin and hammer!

My DS is one of the geeky kids and he and his friends do the coverage of sports day for the school social media and newsletter. They use the iPads to take photos and make a note of who won what etc and then put articles together. It's far more fun for them than actually having to do the sports or be bored to death watching. There is unfortunately a bit of an assumption in most schools that everyone is nuts about sport and people can't see why the kids who are more academic aren't interested. DS is really lucky that his school get it and provide alternatives.

How is it sabotaging it when it isn't stopping those who want to from taking part?

Sports day is what often leads to unsporty kids thinking that sport just isn't for them due to how the day can make unsporty kids feel. I know I didn't realise that actually, I do enjoy some sport, until many years after my school sports days. Sports day made me loathe sports.

It would be so easy to make it more inclusive and make the competitive sports optional.

PE teacher and school gave the middle finger to me. I only reciprocated.

Actually, taking your child out usually is sabotaging it. It certainly is giving a middle finger to the school.

Sports day is actually for everyone, and unsporty kids being validated in a belief that sports are for ‘other’ people does them a massive disservice. And as is so often the case - it is a belief system fostered at home.

Just say she had a stomach bug and keep her off.

Taking your child out of sports day doesn't diminish it or sabotage it for the sporty children or having it be voluntary because they can still do their thing and have their moment of glory. Why would they need non sporty children for that? If anything, the competition would be better and more challenging for sporty children.

IN that case parents should also not be invited to the school play and concerts.

Sports don’t have to be competitive. Neither does sports day. But it should be active.

Sorry i misread that as Biathlon of Sofa Sitting and Competitive Writing.

Maybe because thats how sucessful novelists write, They dont do it running around a field Plenty of achievements involve being sedentary. And then ppl do non competitive excersise to keep fit afterwards

No, my view is not that ridiculous hyperbolic nonsense.
It’s (clue in the name) Sports Day. So every child should do sports.

Presumably, you as a parent, don’t like academics being sabotaged by people who don’t share your view. So you shouldn’t feel entitled to diminish it for others.

Now, if you don’t like how the actual sports day in your actual school is happening, you need to step away from spouting at the internet and go speak to the school with a proposal that gets all the kids, dare I say it, doing sports and which would also be satisfactory to you.

There are loads of different sports, at loads of different levels. If your family can find nothing better than the Biathlon of Sofa Sitting plus Competitive Whining, maybe just maybe it isn’t the school.

My kids school instituted a new plan for sports day which was universally popular. They held heats during ordinary PE in the weeks before the designated day, then the successful sporty kids ran in their races. The rest who were ‘not placed’ were encouraged to attend and participate successfully in the ‘fun marathons’ which consisted of mixed sex races including sack race, ball manoeuvres round some skittles, same with hockey stick, then hop to finish. Very funny, hilarity ensued and all kids from the first years to sixth form had a scream in their year groups.

So you agree then that no child should be forced to participate in this if they don’t want to. Since it is about pleasing ourselves.

My eldest in Y8 has hated sports day since day dot. She is quite sporty but just hates competitive sports, she likes to just play for fun. She has refused to take part the past 2 years and given them attitude saying “you can’t make me”. I did get a phone call home about it and I kinda agreed and said if she doesn’t want to she doesn’t want to….
My youngest is in Y3 but she is diagnosed with ASD, she hates loud noises so all the shouting is too much. She’s attended one sports day, cried the whole time and I’ve kept her off school on sports days ever since with no issue from school.

I don’t feel kids should be forced to compete. They should certainly be encouraged, maybe do some tennis, badminton, something not involving running all the time as it gets monotonous. It could make it more fun. If they choose to not take part then that’s their choice!

Gently, OP, there's no need for embarrassment; her classmates will already know what her level is, because they've been doing PE with her all year. They will also know who is worst at Maths, and which kids can't read out loud fluently in English... and so on.
Not everyone is good at sport (I'm rubbish) but everyone loves a person who is a "good sport". If you cross the finish line miles behind everyone else, you stand proud with both hands in the air as if you're Simone Biles nailing a vault, and take an exaggerated bow, then hug the winner.

Having an audience of parents I think is a different question and agree they should not be invited.

DD cannot do maths, so she is always upset at being shit at maths, will never win an award for it, she gets overlooked at art which she pours her heart and soul into it, never gets awards, is average in English, will never get an award which makes her feel shit. And before you say, she tries hard, very hard and is on the SEN pathway.

So now i should send her to sports day knowing she cant run to save her life, came last in all running races in primary school AND MAKE HER FEEL EVEN MORE SHIT as its something else she cant do and is getting upset and worked up about.

She will not be going to sport day, she has enough disappointment in school as it is. Its not about feeling like a winner its about listening to her and not letting her humiliate herself running round a track infront of parents and get bullied for "letting the class down" for coming last.