To feel like pub staff should not turn a blind eye to inappropriate comments?

I know. It's a bugger a political party making inroads.

On the last day, my DH said something to a man in one of the pubs who made a particularly vile comment. The staff who was present actually told my DH to cheer up!

So they agreed with them. I wouldn't go back and give the racist and sexist scrotes my business.

I first mentioned Reform because I live in Essex, their natural habitat it seems unfortunately.

If someone is being racist, sexist or otherwise threatening to another customer, then the bar staff should tell them to pack it in / fetch landlord to tell them to stop. Random chat that isn't targeted doesn't need to be policed though, if you don't like it then it's up to you to ignore it or go elsewhere.

There's a lovely little pub near me.

Like most pubs, it has a fairly eclectic but mostly male customer base.

The landlady is great and has no issue with ejecting unpleasant men. The place is still full of men. Just not the ones women have to worry about on a night out.

I saw her kick someone out recently who was leering at the young female bar staff. Not saying anything. 'Just' leering. Other men supported her when he initially refused to go.

I bet all those talking about ‘hurty words’ would have something to say if the man was ranting about Karen’s or gammon.

We used to be a bit better than this.

I'd rather live in a society where people have manners and consideration for others. That's hardly North Korea.

Who were they 'abusing'? - the op sounds as though they were chatting amongst themselves.

YANBU OP but racism and Mumsnet go hand-in-hand.

Why is that relevant?

Do you want to live in a society where you are free to think and say what you're thinking; or do you want someone else to decide what you can think and what you are allowed to say?

Spreading racial hatred is illegal. As is slander.

With freedom comes responsibility.

And also the possibility of someone else exercising the freedom to tell you to shut the fuck up or get out of their pub.

I hate to tell you think but if you imagine we have absolute freedom of speech here, or anywhere, you are very seriously deluded.

Freedom to speak does not mean freedom to do so without consequences and there are many, both handed down by the state and by society more generally.

I always mean to search the posts of the freedom of speech warriors who turn up on threads like this and see if they feel
as strongly when the speech involved isn’t racist. I suspect I know the answer.

Realistically, you can’t tell people what they can and can’t say to each other in a pub. If they were being offensive to another person then that is different, but there’s not much you can do if they’re talking amongst themselves, however repulsive and ignorant their views are.

I would have possibly said something, not that it would have changed these obnoxious people’s opinions, but I would have left and gone somewhere else.

😆 🤣 😂 😹 😆 Reform mentionitus strikes again!

I work another minimum wage job.. if I heard a customer (and it does happen) make a racist or sexist comment I wouldn’t like or agree with it, but it wouldn’t be my place to say anything. The caveat to that would be if they directed sexist / racist abuse to another customer or member of my team.. then, yes, I would step in. But I’m also fortunate that my employer / union would back me up if that was to happen. Not everyone has that.

Inappropriate comment?

what would that be then, something you dont like, dont agree with, something offensive?

Its not for anyone to police someones conversation.

The word 'inappropriate' has lost all meaning anyway.

Nor me. Trivialising and minimising abuse is so big and clever. 😏

The OP didnt mention that anyone was abused. She mentioned racist comments, although I havent read the ful thread yet.

People may say unpleasant things about a range of people. Dont hang around them is my advice.

I can't take anyone seriously who uses the term "hurty words".

I didn’t say reform blokes dominate the bar. I said I lived in a county (albeit not in reform central) where you might expect to hear the sort of shit the op refers to. But I just don’t. Not in my very regularly frequented local pubs.

IME, locals often like to try and wind up tourists in pubs. I've often had to listen to OTT swearing and crude talk from (basically, men) people who want to make a point to non-locals.

It's unpleasant but I wouldn't expect pub staff to police it unless it was very extreme. They're very busy and frankly not paid enough to take on nasty, aggressive people who are tanked up on booze!

It's not a happy situation, but it is what it is.

Why is the person at hand an “abuser”. Having a racist opinion or a sexist opinion is not necessarily abusive. It may not be what polite society says is good, but the converse is not “abusive”

if someone insults you, uses a racial slur, for example, that is abuse. It’s directed at you.

So we should all be standing up to the abuser as it happens? Sure that's always wise?

I love pubs too, not ones with reform blokes dominating the bar though

I think you’re vastly over estimating your importance to the landlord.

Pubs are struggling to keep their doors open and it’s the regulars who pay the bills. If you want the landlord to upset his regulars by giving them a list of unacceptable topics of conversation, then you need to get in there and buy a bit more than a red wine and a half a Guinness once every six months.

Either that or find a pub where food sells more than alcohol, children are allowed to make a nuisance of themselves and it’s £3 for a bag of artisan crisps. The sort of men who sit at the bar and air their views on a Wednesday evening will not be found in those places.

Is it me or should staff do more to cut this sort of thing out? It’s you. If you find their opinions abhorrent then have the courage of your convictions and call them out the first time you hear it, rather than expecting minimum wage bar staff to lose their jobs over it.