To feel sad after rejection from school Mum

For whatever reason, she doesn't want to be your friend. Forget it. You may very well find that you have dodged a bullet (I speak from experience!).

Treat her in the same manner.
There is no reason for her to be rude.

Or maybe if you've been rejected yourself (after smiling, being chatty) then you decide to no longer make an effort....that doesn't make you bitchy...it's about self-preservation

Why does she have to be with her child? Can she not just drop her child off? She doesn’t need to be your friend. I didn’t know half my kids’ friends’ parents beyond a brief hello.

@Missj25 - I had a neighbour who wanted my children to go and play with hers, but she didn't allow them to come here, even after mine went twice. I discovered that she was asking them personal questions about my work, whether I cook 'real' meals, and so on, when I asked them how they spent their time ['just reading'], and she actually told me she 'does not allow' her children to go to people's houses. This has nothing to do with your story, I know, but I wrote it to illustrate how people are weird and selfish and nosy. You are lucky to be shot of her.

People have a life away from school mummy mafia and the last thing they want is to meet up out of school. Leave her alone.

Sorry to hear this -
sadly , playgrounds / school mums can be cliquey / snobby

She sounds like one of these !

Her loss

Sad for your LO I know but you’ve tried !

I’d bet money on her son not actually liking your son. And quite possibly having told his mum that.

It’s not that , it’s the fact the kids are friends , but she won’t leave them play together outside of school !
She’s not being nice & is actually rude !

Just because your children are friends, it does not mean that she would want to be your friend.

Be yourself and shine 🌞

Some people really are just arseholes. There’s absolutely no reason for her to be a dick to you meanwhile being nice to everyone around her. Unfortunately this is what some people are like and the school playground can bring out the worst in some people.

She has done you a favour. You wouldn’t really want to spend time with someone who is so socially lacking that they can’t even pretend to be nice. Utterly weird. It’s not you, it’s her.

Sending lots of love ♥️

You invited her to park twice, and childs disco, she has said no, I'm the same to be honest, if mums at school gate are chatting fine, I'll join in talk about weather, kids and if anythings happening with the class, but if one of them asked me to go to the park or "play date" no! It's just not me, I have a group of friends and I'm not that interested in acquiring more, so maybe it's just this and as you've tryed few times it's probably that she feels uncomfortable incase you ask again. Don't take it personally.

You can't make people be friends with you. Let it go.

People have their own lives don't they?Everyone is there because their kids go to the same school. It doesn't mean you're anything more than acquaintances. If you make a real friend a long the way, that's great. As the kids get older they can socialise without the parents, so thankfully, it removes all of those barriers. Some people have friends outside of school, and work etc so just aren't bothered the same way.

Primary school parents are a bit of a minefield, largely because it's a microcosm of society. You get so many different personalities and circumstances within a small environment. Unless you've done something awful, a parent not making an effort with you isn't personal.

You have the parents who met at NCT have been friends for years and just have no interest in speaking to others beyond their group

You have parents that will talk to anyone

Parents who are so scarred by school cliques they keep everyone at arms length

Parents who rush off to work

And everything in between.

I'm a parent that only spoke to a few parents I got to know over time. If someone approached me I would never be rude and ignore them completely, but I wouldn't have a long conversation with them. And if they didn't approach me I wouldn't acknowledge them or instigate any contact, because small talk bores me.

I also have an RBF. I always look mildly cross if I'm not talking. It's just my face. I pulled the same expression as a baby. There's probably some poor souls out there who think I've glared at them when I'm actually just in my own world.

This mum doesn't sound like a dick or like she's evil. She just sounds like someone who isn't interested in knowing you.

This happened in nursery too for me. Asked my ds friends mums for playdates. Always busy. It's because I'm not posh enough I guess and wear alternative clothing.
But tough shit I'm not changing to fit in, miserable bitches.
Our son can have as many friends round ours as he wants. I'm happy being the hub.

I had this many years ago. In primary school her daughter seemed to have a crush on my son and would follow him around relentlessly, they were only about 8 at the time. Was quite sweet, as usual my son being a male just seemed fairly oblivious but he’s always been a friendly lad. I thought why not let her daughter come round for a play date during the holidays etc. but when I suggested it she always looked at me like a rabbit in the headlights. Basically she was one of the groupie “cool” mums and I definitely wasn’t one of them (thank god). I think she was upset that that her daughters affections were fixated on a lesser mortal 🤣

This is deranged. This other mother, who simply doesn’t want to hang out with OP - as is her right - is now being called, amongst other things, ‘selfish’, ‘evil’ (really?), ‘prick’, ‘nasty’, and a ‘snob’. Just because she prefers to sit with her own friends.

My DS is an only. I used to host loads of play dates when he was in reception. I never invited the mothers; I collected from school and they’d pick up. The only mums I’d have at mine were my actual friends; the ones I liked and wanted to hang with.

I struggle with the whole concept of ‘play dates’. I hate everything about them, from the wanky sounding name to the expectation that the mums have to sit together and make polite conversation and be friends. It’s either forcing a friendship between the mums, simply because the kids get on, or forcing a friendship between the kids, simply because the mums get on. The whole thing is unnatural. And did I mention how cringey the name is? Who came up with the name? They should have been shot the minute that phrase came out of their mouth.

Let your children manage their own social lives. What happened to coming out from school and asking your mum if Alison can come home for tea tomorrow? Or round to play at the weekend? How will they manage when they get to secondary school and have only the vaguest idea of how to have a natural friendship because their mums have always facilitated everything for them?

OP, you’re just not her cup of tea at first glance. It’s an ego blow. Of course it is. But think of all the reasons you take a dislike to people you don’t really know. And whatever it is, it’s obviously not a part of your personality, because she doesn’t know you well enough. So it’s going to be something small and insignificant. The point is, it doesn’t matter because she’s not your friend either. You don’t have to spend any time with her, pretending to be interested in her extension or what she’s cooking for tea. She’s left room for you to be friends with some who likes every bit of you.

My friend is going through the same kinda thing at the moment, but she’s the other mum! Friends son is pals with another boy in his class and they’re both quite naughty - my friend is convinced that the other boy brings out the worst in her son. The other mum sounds like you @Cafeshops in just making polite suggestions occasionally for them to get together. My friend however is not keen to encourage the boys’ friendship even though she quite likes the other mum, but also doesn’t want to offend by saying her son is naughty - so she openly tells me she avoids the other mum and makes excuses not to meet up, and feels awkward when she’s around - but she does like her.
I don’t suppose my post helps much sorry OP, but I just really wanted to point out that maybe it’s her not you, as in maybe it’s a her thing that she doesn’t want to encourage the boys friendship for whatever reason.

It's her kids friends mum. She can make her choices and she has made a selfish nasty one.

Because her kid is good friends with the wicked mum kid. How did you miss this.

Hey op this is just how some mums are she has her click just don’t make any effort with her whatsoever treat her like she’s treating you. Your son might like her son but next year they could fall out then it won’t matter it is hard when your just trying to be nice. You tried now leave her to it she really isn’t worth it.

This might sound a bit out there OP , some parents only like to see their friends with kids from school that match them financially..
Is she a snob ?
I obviously have no idea what you do for a living, nor am I asking ..