‘You’re NOT allowed to get married again’.

I’d want DH to consider the kids first of all. One of them would absolutely hate having a stepmum so on that basis I would prefer DH to wait till they are grown and moved out. No issues with him seeing someone, just not moving in, till later.

If she wants to protect her kids inheritance, they need to consult a financial advisor on how to go about that. That's not a bad idea anyway if they have assets.

What an idiotic idea.
I'd go "yes yes, of course my dear" and when he kicks the bucket do as I please.

In our belief system you're still married after you're dead, so no, we cannot remarry if we are widowed. If he dies, he's still my husband regardless of if he dies when he's 50 or 70 or next week. ah well he can just shag around then.
Seriously though nobody can be having these conversations seriously since once you’re dead there is literally nothing you can do about it.

Personally even if I became single I couldn’t be arsed to go out and find another man, but you can never say never.

My SIL died 7 years ago and her DH remarried two years later. My ILs have welcomed her into the family with open arms, her ILs however have cut her off completely, even the kids.

But making stipulations on how someone lives after you die is incredibly controlling and emotionally manipulative, and if my husband was genuinely that serious about how I was to live my life after he died I might be re-thinking the relationship during life never mind after.

I’d never remarry again ever!

Why would I even consider it?

Nah, would not be happy to be honest. My Mum and Dad have been married 50 odd years, I couldn’t deal with it if one them remarried either.

I would prefer he didn't remarry again to protect my children's inheritance. I understand what people are saying about being to to protect the kids inheritance but I would like him to have use of the money in the meantime and be able to sell up and relocate closer to family if he wanted too.

Unless more children are planned for the new relationship I genuinely don't understand the point of remarrying anyway.

After my DM died my DF did have a second relationship with a lovely lady who made his final years so much happier than they would have otherwise been. They lived together but kept finances separate to each leave their assets to their own children without muddying the waters. DH and I have both agreed we'd be fine with each other doing similar.

My husband is absolutely lovely, I’d want him to do whatever makes him happy.

If your friend did die first and her widower did meet someone and remarried, it’s unlikely that she’d know.
I just think it’s a weird thing to say..

I don’t mind about them moving on but not marriage. I think this complicates finances more. I would not want to share my wealth with next wife and her kids.

Of course I'd want him go meet someone. I have given this a lot of thought as shortly after DC was born I had a nasty battle with cancer. I did win the fight but it was horrendous thinking of them two of them alone and knowing my DC would have no memory of me.

I would absolutely want him to meet someone but that someone would have to love my DC. That's my one condition.

I'm old enough to know I won't remarry ever.

For financial reasons and to protect the children I would also be against either of us remarrying should one of us die.
I have had first hand experience of grandparents and great grandparents 2nd marriages resulting in money being left to the family of the step parent when the natural parent dies first in 2nd marriage.

So yes my DH can date, but absolutely not re marry or leave any property or family money to anyone other than our children. I'm happy to play by the same rule!

That can’t be guaranteed unfortunately 😥

My dad married again after my Mum died (I was 8). I was subjected to years of emotional and physical abuse by my Step Mother and my Father did SFA about it.
Put me off step parents!!!
I wouldn’t marry again if my DH died as I’ve got the emotional scars from a re-marriage and would hate my DD to go through life with a step parent.
My DH grew up with step parents too and hated it.
Having a partner is one thing, but moving them into the family home is a completely different ball game.

I want DH to be happy and have a relationship but I want my DC inheritance protected.

Also make a Will that protects your children's inheritance please 🙏 my half of the house will go to our son but my partner can live there until he dies or chooses to sell.

I think it's fine to meet someone else but there does need to be a respectful amount of time & a 'take it slow approach' especially if children are involved. My FIL moved on very quickly (weeks 😫) & although I understand why (he could not cope on his own) it was very, very painful for his children & their poor mum was never spoke of again. Until you live it or see it you cannot begin to imagine the hurt it caused 💔

I told my dh if I die and he meets someone else to make sure she treats my kids as if they were her own.

I think I would like to remain single if I was widowed, because I have been married twice, and would like my own time and place in later years. Although I should never say never. I have however, instructed my husband to find a new love if I go first, he needs someone more than I do, because he's hopeless at looking after himself or the cat. I've half jokingly asked a friend to take him on, she half jokingly said she would think about it.

You don’t know until you are widowed. Your whole
life changes in a moment and the future is shockingly unpredictable.

I am very uninterested in marrying again myself. Will be ok on my own.

Don't want to ever be a step mum. Not cut out for it.

Like a pp I’ve jokingly told my DH I would haunt him if he found somebody else when I’m dead.

The reality is I won’t know either way as I will be dead. I don’t like the idea of him finding someone else, but purely from a very selfish mother point of view - I wouldn’t like another woman being mum to my children and me to miss everything. At the same time I wouldn’t want them to be without a mother so I would hope the woman would be the maternal type if he did find somebody else!

If the children were adults though I don’t think I would care if he remarried.