Is 46 too old for a baby?

Totally agree with this. I had my DS at 46, conceived accidentally at 45! He’s the love of my life and I’m working hard to stay fit and healthy for him. He also has a massive extended family around him. Yes it’s tiring but it’s the best thing I ever did!

If you feel fit and well you could try. Sadly you have low chance of conceiving and high risk of miscarriage. Also consider what you would do in case of Down’s syndrome pregnancy.

Absolutely dependant on the individual.
I had mine at 39 and 42 (DH 2yrs older), I even completed a 2nd degree whilst also working full time with the second and changed careers.
They are absolutely gorgeous, perfect little people and probably the luckiest children i know. We both work hard but every weekend, every holiday, everything we do is for our children, they enjoy a wide range of hobbies, we're always out and about with them, they've travelled the world and had so many adventures. They could not enjoy a better life or be more loved.

No harm in trying

If it’s what you want, then go for it and don’t wait around. Be prepared for disappointment if things don’t go to plan, and if they do, be prepared for it to turn your life upside down, but for all the best possible reasons. No matter what age you are, being a mum to a small child is tiring. It’s your mental attitude on it that gets you through. For me, I’m so grateful to be a mum so I took all the exhaustion in my stride as much as possible.
Good luck and congrats on finding your soulmate. You’ve given me hope that I can still find mine 💕

It would be too old for me, I'm 45 and would not have the energy to go through a pregnancy now, let alone look after a baby/ toddler.

I already have older children though, I might feel differently if I always wanted to be a Mum and it hadn't happened for me yet. I also might have more energy if I hadn't yet had my kids!

Its a personal choice OP, only you and your partner know if its right for you so would take any advice on here with a pinch of salt

I wouldn’t have wanted a child at that age. I’m 49 now and I’ve raised four children, eldest is 27 this year and youngest is 16.

It is a very long journey and I wouldn’t want to be at the beginning at my current life stage. They are still fairly needy in their early twenties so you’d be approaching 70 with a child that still probably needs you quite a bit. My mum died when she was 73.

I do know a few different older parents, they have funds for a lot of help though but they are doing fine and fit and healthy enough themselves.
Personally, I have very active boys, I had them at 31 and 35 and DH is 8 years older than me. I do feel we arent able to give them the energy that younger parents would, so things like playing sports with them, we do but we just dont have the energy levels that say a couple that had kids in their early 20s could give. But we do give them other things, like nice holidays etc that we wouldnt afford in our 20s.
Also, the lifestyle shift, you will be waking up early as in 6 or 7am for at least a decade, your time is not your own anymore and you have to do all sorts of things, every day you just didnt have to do before and still fit in your own life. Dh struggled with this more than me as he had had a longer period being his own boss completely, the self sacrifice is immense. Your money, your time, your body mind and soul is shared and sacrificed. I think this is the biggest shock. And this is for 18 years at least, then likely another ten of support needed while they find their feet into adulthood.
Ideally, if its what you want you need to start now trying.

Yes it's too old imo.

Yes, I’d only consider with donor eggs from a younger donor too, it’s too risky for the child for me at that age. If I was desperate (and I completely sympathise babies are lovely) I’d go that route. And I’d make sure I really invested in life insurance and critical illness cover and wrote a good will and had someone setup if I and DH died - all things you should do anyway when you have dc but will cost you more at this age.

Think through whether you could cope, not just with a baby, but with a child, and if that would change with a disabled child.

Yes

Why should you miss out on the joy of being a mother just because you didn’t meet Mr Right until you were in your 40s?

Because of the impact on the child. And I say that as the child.

Realistically you're unlikely to carry a healthy baby to term with your own eggs. It happens, but is rare.

I understand this. My 2 uncles died relatively young - 32 and 52 - so I've always had the view that death can happen at any age and you just seize life and joy while you can. My dh was 46 when we had our first and 49 with our second (I was 30s) - 13 years later he's a pretty active dad, plays tennis with the kids etc

Do have a careful look at the stats so you make an informed decision bearing in mind the risks at your age.

From a quick google miscarriage rates over 45 are over half, risk of a trisomy at 46 is 1 in 16. Stillbirth rates are higher. So this is quite a high risk enterprise.

If you were to use donor eggs these rates would generally decrease.

I know quite a few women who are having babies in their late 40's now some with help some naturally. I think it really depends on you, your health and fertility, your family and partners family history, your own commitment to staying in good health for as long as possible for your possible future child.

Two things I've heard people say repeatedly that helped (obviously excluding actual medical intervention) was the book, It starts with the Egg by Rebecca Fett and a good Chinese herbalist and acupuncturist, Chinese herbs in particular seem to have resulted in a lot of success stories in my circle. However you can read It starts with the Egg and get started on her advice, supplement protocol pretty much right away.

I think you need to think long term and what's fair for the child. So yes, it probably is

Go for it x

If you decide you really do want a baby (rather than just “I’ll try and see what happens”), then I’d go straight to donor eggs. Obviously there’s a lot to process and consider with that though.

I adopted at 44, I am 61 now. He is nearly 17, it has been a joy. I did not find it hard at all and still don't. But I am aware I may die in his early adulthood. However, my mother is still alive and living independently at 91 so I hope I have her genes.

I think it's extremely naive to assume nobody regrets having children, especially at an advanced maternal age and all the additional risks that involves.

I don't think it's too old. If you're in a happy, secure relationship and you're financially stable then let's face it, you'll potentially be able to offer the child more than many younger people who have a baby.

Yes too old