Page 9 | Cleaner threw away/moved/stole my secret booze stash

Dubaichocisbetterthanexpected · 2025-06-01T20:29:02+00:00

I rarely drink, I haven’t since Dv was born and since Peri kicked in and made me ill, every time I did. Things have been stressful recently and Ive been having the odd drink on the balcony at sunset on my own. I usually don’t drink it all and usually put the remainder behind my bedroom patio shutters outside Anyway, I came to have some tonight and they’ve all gone, cleaners came yesterday so an assuming it’s them as they clean the patio area too Why would they do that?

Original poster

Dubaichocisbetterthanexpected · 01/06/2025 22:05

ThatShyRoseViper · 01/06/2025 22:02

Don’t you think it would be more helpful to model positive behaviour around alcohol? That definitely doesn’t include having a secret stash on the balcony (including your empties).

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She doesn’t know it’s there. As I said, she’s only seen us have a glass or two at parties with friends

OP posts:

Original poster

Dubaichocisbetterthanexpected · 01/06/2025 22:04

Annascaul · 01/06/2025 22:01

Would a 6 year old be traumatised by seeing a bottle of cider in the fridge? 🤔

No of course not, but seeing me sat drinking alone..I know she wouldn’t be traumatised by that, I just don’t like it somehow

OP posts:

JemimaPiddlepot · 01/06/2025 22:03

PinkyFlamingo · 01/06/2025 21:40

Stop saying you barely drink. You do drink and your hiding it

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So OTT!

OnlyMabelInTheBuilding · 01/06/2025 22:03

The drinking outside in secret and hiding the bottles is far more worrisome than a 6yo seeing their parent have a glass of wine with dinner in front of them. Your past has understandably given you issues.

Original poster

Dubaichocisbetterthanexpected · 01/06/2025 22:02

Barnbrack · 01/06/2025 21:59

How often in the past month.

How many times this week?

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Twice a week maybe, last 2/3 weeks

OP posts:

ThatShyRoseViper · 01/06/2025 22:02

Dubaichocisbetterthanexpected · 01/06/2025 21:53

Yes maybe, I just don’t want her childhood to be seeing me or dh drinking and definitely not drunk

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Don’t you think it would be more helpful to model positive behaviour around alcohol? That definitely doesn’t include having a secret stash on the balcony (including your empties).

Annascaul · 01/06/2025 22:01

Would a 6 year old be traumatised by seeing a bottle of cider in the fridge? 🤔

UpUpUpU · 01/06/2025 22:01

Is it not warm to drink? That doesn’t sound at all enjoyable

Barnbrack · 01/06/2025 22:01

Dubaichocisbetterthanexpected · 01/06/2025 22:00

6, until the last couple of weeks, the last time was just before christmas for a meet up with friends, before then September ish and before then a leaving party in July. Probably two drinks at each of those occasions, that’s barely drinking in my eyes. Before Dd I’d drink Friday and some Saturday nights, also wasn’t excessive, but now (until recently) it’s a handful of times per year

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How many times this month, how many times this week and how many all somersbys at a sitting

Original poster

Dubaichocisbetterthanexpected · 01/06/2025 22:01

AzureShark · 01/06/2025 21:58

Because it looked like discarded old drinks. One half empty but one full small bottle of cider, tucked away and forgotten about on the balcony and clearly rubbish. No wonder the cleaner just cleared them out.

That's what anyone would think because hiding small cider bottles outside on your balcony is just fucking odd and not what people do.

You have significant issues with alcohol op and extremely disordered thinking about it. Your actions aren't normal. Stop drinking entirely and get therapy.

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Harsh.

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Original poster

Dubaichocisbetterthanexpected · 01/06/2025 22:00

Barnbrack · 01/06/2025 21:57

How old is your child and how often is not that often? How many times in the past month, fortnight, week?

6, until the last couple of weeks, the last time was just before christmas for a meet up with friends, before then September ish and before then a leaving party in July. Probably two drinks at each of those occasions, that’s barely drinking in my eyes. Before Dd I’d drink Friday and some Saturday nights, also wasn’t excessive, but now (until recently) it’s a handful of times per year

OP posts:

JemimaPiddlepot · 01/06/2025 21:59

Vatsallfolks · 01/06/2025 21:36

Why do you feel the need to hide it ? That’s my greatest concern.

Your “concern”?

dogcatkitten · 01/06/2025 21:59

Ask the cleaner, 'There were a couple of bottles on the patio, where are they?'

Barnbrack · 01/06/2025 21:59

Dubaichocisbetterthanexpected · 01/06/2025 21:57

It’s only recently, before that I drank less than you have just written, had nothing at Christmas etc. The warmer weather is here, it’s the end of the day, I reallsed it isnt making me feel ill anymore

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How often in the past month.

How many times this week?

CalicoPusscat · 01/06/2025 21:59

Don't think it helps criticising OP.

@Dubaichocisbetterthanexpected just keep it in the fridge, let DP know you want the occasional drink and ask cleaner not to touch bottles as you'll deal with glass (plastic?) yourself

AzureShark · 01/06/2025 21:58

Dubaichocisbetterthanexpected · 01/06/2025 21:51

I wouldn’t fire her, just curious why she possibly might do this

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Because it looked like discarded old drinks. One half empty but one full small bottle of cider, tucked away and forgotten about on the balcony and clearly rubbish. No wonder the cleaner just cleared them out.

That's what anyone would think because hiding small cider bottles outside on your balcony is just fucking odd and not what people do.

You have significant issues with alcohol op and extremely disordered thinking about it. Your actions aren't normal. Stop drinking entirely and get therapy.

Original poster

Dubaichocisbetterthanexpected · 01/06/2025 21:57

Barnbrack · 01/06/2025 21:55

For context op, I barely drink. For me thateans I had half a glass of wine last week, around a month before that I had a bottle of pear cider in the garden in the nice weather, before that it was Christmas. It's not barely drinking to drink alone at night when the baby is in bed and hide the evidence while convincing yourself it is hardly drinking. Especially when you have a family history of covert alcoholism.

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It’s only recently, before that I drank less than you have just written, had nothing at Christmas etc. The warmer weather is here, it’s the end of the day, I reallsed it isnt making me feel ill anymore

OP posts:

Barnbrack · 01/06/2025 21:57

How old is your child and how often is not that often? How many times in the past month, fortnight, week?

Dearover · 01/06/2025 21:56

Have you asked your DP? That would seem to be the logical thing to do, especially as you say you have nothing to hide.

tripleginandtonic · 01/06/2025 21:55

People who don't have a problem with alcohol have it inside the house, not hidden on the patio. You're being weird OP.

Barnbrack · 01/06/2025 21:55

Dubaichocisbetterthanexpected · 01/06/2025 21:42

As I said, only recently and it’s every few days, one bottle if that, compared to everyone I know that is barely drinking, its also a very low alcohol and small bottle, I haven’t had wine, spirits, beer etc for 7 or so years

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For context op, I barely drink. For me thateans I had half a glass of wine last week, around a month before that I had a bottle of pear cider in the garden in the nice weather, before that it was Christmas. It's not barely drinking to drink alone at night when the baby is in bed and hide the evidence while convincing yourself it is hardly drinking. Especially when you have a family history of covert alcoholism.

Tiswa · 01/06/2025 21:54

Dubaichocisbetterthanexpected · 01/06/2025 21:52

It’s only small Somersby

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Yes exactly so why are you hiding it? That is where the disordered thinking comes in because it can’t both be a small harmless bottle of cider and something you need to hide from her as a secret or something back.

I agree it is just a small cider and one that can be drunk inside

Original poster

Dubaichocisbetterthanexpected · 01/06/2025 21:53

Tiswa · 01/06/2025 21:50

Because there is nothing wrong with having a small cider in the house every now and then putting it outside is making it something shameful and I think you see it that way.

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Yes maybe, I just don’t want her childhood to be seeing me or dh drinking and definitely not drunk

OP posts:

Moonnstars · 01/06/2025 21:53

Surely you are making an issue of drinking alcohol by hiding it. You need to normalise it otherwise your child will possibly see it as something forbidden and may be more inclined to binge/keep it a secret from you in the future if they were drinking themselves. You are best to be open about it. Have a glass of wine with dinner. Show them that it is fine in moderation. Same with sweets, fast food and so on.

Anyway in regards to where the hidden stash has gone, I am guessing the bin as you left it looking untidy so it was thrown away.

MeganM3 · 01/06/2025 21:53

I don’t think the cleaner would have stolen it. So either they binned it thinking it was rubbish left outside (I would!) or someone else binned it or drank it. Put it somewhere more sensible next time, like the kitchen.