Allowed teenage daughter wear trainers DH bought for me

I think you have mixed responses as a previous poster said you left the most important info until the last line. As often happens here, most responders don't always read the full post. You hadn't worn them yourself. That makes a big difference.
There is nothing weird about your husband's reaction. Understandable.
You'll wear them today so he can see you love them? 🤔

I expect he’s thinking they will shortly become the dd’s new trainers.

How is he usually, OP?

His reaction could be because he wanted to do something special for you and from his pov watched you casually let your Dd go off in your unworn gift, and he maybe feels generally taken for granted etc

Or

He could be controlling and feels that what is yours his his to decree.

Your response would need to be very different depending on what you think motivation is and what the usual dynamic of your relationship is.

And do you often indulge your teen Dd?

I would never ask or expect to wear anyone’s brand new trainers!

Yep, I'd be hurt in his position. And I'm far from thin skinned. You gave the impression that you didn't value his gift.

My daughters have always borrowed items of my clothing, so it's not that I find that odd all of. But less than 24 hours after he gave them to you, you handed them over as if they were just any old item.

Personally I think letting someone else wear your footwear is a bit odd/grim anyway and on this scenario I definitely understand why he’s upset.

Id feel pretty put out if I gave someone a thoughtful gift and they let someone else use it first

Really weird thing to get upset about. It’s lovely he got them but they are your trainers if you want to help your dd feel nice then that’s fine. He also needs to look up the meaning of the word naive

The way to show you absolutely love something is not to let someone else wear that thing first. You should have been more mindful. And your DH is understandably annoyed: you not only let someone else wear those sneakers first, but you are now telling him he's wrong for being annoyed about it. Dismissing his feelings is not a good idea at all if you want him to communicate with you and be honest (and to get you gifts in future).

You should try, in future, to do a better job of thinking through how your actions might impact others - particularly your reaction when your husband does something nice for you.

It doesnt change the fact that he's upset, and I dont blame him

Plus other posters have pointed out it might mean that he thinks OP wont really be getting them back, they've sort of been claimed by the daughter.

So another words, he only gives gifts with strings. Real nice of him

/s

Well it’s not really irrelevant, if you’re going to insult someone it’s best to know what the insult you’re using means!

Over my cold dead body would anyone wear my new shoes before me, no matter how well they went with her ruddy trousers.

if I was your DH I’d be miffed too. Having said that, the histrionics from him sound a bit much.

follow up post about the voucher influences my view - he received something nice, decided to do a nice thing and gift it to OP and OP promptly gave it away. I’d be wondering why I’d bothered. He’s overreacting (and needs to look up what naive means) but he wouldn’t be unreasonable to decide not to repeat his mistake.

If you were happy to loan them to her then I don't see what the issue is. Where they very expensive perhaps?

It doesnt really matter if hes got the word naive wrong, thats rather irrelevant

I would be really pissed off if I had taken the trouble to get someone a nice gift and before they've even used it, they give it away/lend it out

Also its not generally thought appropriate to share shoes with someone, the way our foot sits in a shoe shapes the shoe, the first time these have been worn is now with her foot. (not that he's probably aware of this as an issue)

Well, he clearly got the gift for you, not your child. He put thought into what to get...and you turned around and let your child wear them before you wore them. That isn't what he had in mind at all - and it's bizarre that you can't see that from his point of view you essentially gave the gift he gave you to your child. He didn't intend to give your child brand new sneakers. Imagine if you gave him a gift and he turned around and gave it to his best mate to wear before he wore it...I doubt you'd be terribly impressed.

Next time be a bit more mindful: you should have worn the trainers first. It wasn't kind of you to just give away the present he gave you. There's a big difference between letting your daughter try the sneakers on and letting her actually wear them out!!! Not cool!

If I bothered to buy someone a pair of Nike Jordan high tops and they turned around and gave then to someone else to wear then that would be the last time they get a new pair of sneakers from me.

If hes otherwise not an arse then just say to him what you've said here- they just go well with her trousers and she wanted to wear them. A lot of people judge and assess things by their own actions, I.e. he probably things id only give them to someone else if I hated them but thats not the case for all. If of course he is nasty about other things then hes probably just not very nice.

He called me naive for not attaching importance to a gift he gave.

Buy him a dictionary as a gift, he doesn’t even know what naive means.

He's being a bit weird. If dh did this with one's I'd just bought him I would laugh and roll my eyes at him indulging her.
Maybe it depends how materialistic you are? I don't attach much importance to material things.
Perhaps they were of symbolic significance to him? Perhaps the voucher meant a lot to him?
Whatever, his reaction wouldn't be one I'd be happy with and dramatic statements plus the misuse of naive would put me right off him.

It wouldn't bother me. I'd think it was really heartwarming that you loved DD so much that you wanted to share your lovely new trainers with her.

Does dd have nice things / new trainers too? If she doesn’t and he’s generally tight with spending money on her then I can see why you might want to lend them to her. But if you all have nice things and these were a special gift then he’s right to be annoyed. (If the whole family is short of money and there’s a teen in the house who would really appreciate new trainers then I think most parents would have let them have them over themselves).

YABU. He used his voucher for a gift for you, not his daughter. You have basically taken the gift and given it to your daughter. He could have chosen to use the voucher for himself but he didn’t.

I thought so too!

I see his point. He thought he was doing something nice for you by using his voucher for something FOR YOU. But you didn't even wear them once before giving them to your daughter. I can see how he feels he wasted his money. If he wanted to buy something for his daughter, he would have bought something for her. It really does look like you didn't appreciate his gift.

You were rude. How can you not see this?

Put your self in his shoes with a gift.