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What is the smartest way of dealing with a new manager at work who nitpicks despite not really understanding my job?

60 replies

AngelaBeverage · 01/06/2025 05:53

This is so frustrating.

At my workplace there are several smallish teams (4 - 8 people) and in each team one person is the team leader. This person also does the same job as the rest of us but is paid more for doing more administration, going to the management meetings and feeding back whatever management wants this week, and generally being the point of call for anything that doesn't fall in the standard role remit. I would say that 80% of the team leader's role is just to do her job like the rest of us. 20% extra stuff on top.

In my team, we are all qualified professionals who have been doing this job for quite a long time. We work collaboratively at times, and there is a decent amount of respect for each other's expertise and professionalism. I like my collegues and often learn from them.

Also worth saying that although one person is the team leader, other people in the team might be the authority on a particular aspect of the job. I have a contracted part of my job which makes me the lead on one aspect of our work for the whole staff, and management defer to me on this particular thing because I have experience and qualifications in this field. The same is true for my collegues in other areas.

For reasons best known to themselves, management have appointed a new team leader in our team who has never actually done our job before. She has been extremely heavy handed in her first two weeks, definitely trying to make the point that she's The Boss. She assigns us admin tasks, which is unusual. She says things like "and when I say that's due on Monday, I mean before 8am Monday, not at some point when you feel like it." She has not made the slightest effort to get to know any of us, and she is certainly not coming from any perspective of respect for any of us being able to do our jobs.

We are not a team in need of 'fixing'. In fact, we're doing well and have been leading the way this year. She has come from a background in managing a small business. I think she thinks we're staff. Which, I suppose we are, but it's really getting everyone's back up to be spoken to constantly like teenagers trying to cut corners in their part-time job. We all work hard and take pride in our work.

I have a large piece of work coming out in a couple of weeks and she asked told me she would like a sample so she could check I was on the right track. This is unheard of. (She has never actually done the thing I'm doing, whereas I have done it many times before). I asked her what she wanted to check for, and she told me that she checked my collegue too and found they were overusing pronouns in their writing. WTF?? Anyway, I gritted my teeth and sent her a page of my work and she's sent it back covered in highlighters, and apparently I overuse pronouns too. (I'm actually going to quote her feedback: "You have used two many pronouns. Can you join some sentences together so you use less?" I promise I'm not making this up.)

I can't complain to management (very complicated situation). I'm stuck with her for the rest of the year. How do I manage this without being rude or bursting a blood vessel in my temple?

Please, please, does anyone have any calm and measured advice on how best to deal with this situation?

OP posts:
LlynTegid · 01/06/2025 07:40

I agree with speaking to colleagues to see if they are receiving the same unreasonable treatment.

Speak also to your trade union if you belong to one.

Sadworld23 · 01/06/2025 07:37

I have a similar work situation, although it's a colleague who feels herself superior rather than a TL..

I ask her for help on stuff I don't need help with. And I ask her to verify stuff that I'm bored with lol.

I ask questions I could find my own answers too but I do it to play up to her superiority complex and pretend I'm inferior and then I use the space to do what I want.

Oh and I innocently out her mistakes in group meetings, so I might show her work, with a mistake in, as I great example of something else. (Our job has multiple facets so one bit can be fab while the text poor)..
When others (including our boss) complain about her style, I fully support her saying how she us do well meaning and has the job in mind wuth all her complaints and of course we can forgive her bolshy emails.

This is perhaps easier for me as I've no ambition to move on and I'm hopeful she will soon.
In summary I get my kicks from subtly taking the p-- without being bolshy.
Maybe I've given you some ideas how to move forward, but either way don't let her get to you.

JustMyView13 · 01/06/2025 07:33

Use AI to fulfil her edit requests.
You really need to learn the art of managing upwards too. She wants detail, she wants to review. Give her detail, ask for lots of feedback. Let her know you’re wanting to ensure the work is delivered to the standard she requires as the new boss.
She will quickly become overwhelmed and get bored. I suspect she doesn’t have enough work on & is trying to create the role into what she thinks it should be. You’ve landed yourself a micromanager, not a leader. And honestly, I micromanage the fuck out of them back. Once you’ve sent your drafts for review, follow up. Have you had chance to review this yet? Any comments?
Have a tracker and clearly record what’s with the boss for review, and if that delays you, note that down.

RandomMess · 01/06/2025 07:27

You could also ask if they are getting rid of the editing process as that is when any unnecessary over use of pronouns etc would be reviewed and corrections made.

luckylavender · 01/06/2025 07:27

She’s your boss. There’s a reason she’s been brought in. You may not been performing as well as you think. Or you maybe stale (as a team). She is of course stamping her authority and this will be painful because it’s a change. You either have to roll with it and give her time or look for a different job.

Soontobe60 · 01/06/2025 07:23

If I were told to hand something in by 8am on a Monday, I would respond with ‘so that would be end of working day on Friday then’.

Smeegall · 01/06/2025 07:20

Could you not run your work through chatgpt and tell it to reduce the amount of pronouns. Ask it to count them before and then after too?

I'd tell her that's what you've done as well...

Unless you wrote something like this:
She told him that they saw her with us, but he insisted it was them, not themselves, who we believed had found it for me.

In which case yes I agree too many pronouns.

spoonbillstretford · 01/06/2025 07:19

I'd have a meeting with colleagues and see if they feel the same. Then have a meeting with them and her bringing up all these points honestly.. Feedback is a two way street.

I'd say she is terrified and hasn't enough experience to do the job, either the core job or managing people.

RedBeech · 01/06/2025 07:19

AngelaBeverage · 01/06/2025 06:44

Yes, I rolled my eyes at the fewer / less thing too.

Perhaps I should ask her to write an exemplar that uses less fewer pronouns to circulate within the team so we all understand what to do.

What's especially frustrating is that there is a robust editing phase for all big pieces of work. I'm not above making errors or starting two sentences with the same word, but these things would get picked up in editing before publishing. She claimed she wanted to see if I was "on the right track" and that I had the right "tone" but then nitpicked editing nonsense.

Deep breath.

Right. This isn't about pronoun overuse. This is about her pissing on our turf to let us know that she's the boss. And the most sensible response is to.... what? Let it wash over me, smile politely, and continue to do my job well as I always have?

You're right. She's just trying to show who is boss. The very grown up thing to do would be to say, 'noted' and just get on with it.

But the temptation to point out 'two' and 'less' would be strong.

Doingmybest12 · 01/06/2025 07:12

Perhaps respond in ways that help her learn about your set up. She's trying to get to grips with things by controlling things that possibly dont matter. Why not just point out that thanks for the suggestions, things like this get picked up in editing and ask is the content and technical detail OK? Her pointing out deadline is morning not at the end of the day is fine, clumsy but fine. Just give her a chance. It is inconsistent managers who are really hard to work with or those purposeful manipulative. Hopefully she will settle down.

Cardshade · 01/06/2025 06:58

I gritted my teeth

well that is going to achieve the square root of nothing

Cardshade · 01/06/2025 06:57

AngelaBeverage · 01/06/2025 06:56

Maybe I was being dramatic here. Managemt are tricky and often pull in two directions at once. You're never sure where they stand. But in any case, it's hardly a good look to go and moan about the new person they have appointed.

Well if it was only you, then yes

Sounds a bizarre company if you can’t talk to anyone in management about what sounds like a legitimate concern

although might be an idea to talk to the new team leader first, which you don’t appear to have done

Cardshade · 01/06/2025 06:56

AngelaBeverage · 01/06/2025 06:54

Absolutely not. It's not a role I could manage to add to my current workload.

They thought she could manage it though.

She was an external candidate?

AngelaBeverage · 01/06/2025 06:56

Cardshade · 01/06/2025 06:52

“Very complicated situation” as to why you can’t approach anyone in management regarding your concerns?

that is a little odd op

Maybe I was being dramatic here. Managemt are tricky and often pull in two directions at once. You're never sure where they stand. But in any case, it's hardly a good look to go and moan about the new person they have appointed.

OP posts:
AngelaBeverage · 01/06/2025 06:54

Cardshade · 01/06/2025 06:51

By any chance did you unsuccessfully go for this team leader role? If not, do you feel it should have been offered to you

Absolutely not. It's not a role I could manage to add to my current workload.

OP posts:
Cardshade · 01/06/2025 06:52

“Very complicated situation” as to why you can’t approach anyone in management regarding your concerns?

that is a little odd op

Cardshade · 01/06/2025 06:52

We are not a team in need of 'fixing'.

no doubt her line manager has told her differently

Cardshade · 01/06/2025 06:51

By any chance did you unsuccessfully go for this team leader role? If not, do you feel it should have been offered to you

ButteredRadishes · 01/06/2025 06:47

AngelaBeverage · 01/06/2025 06:44

Yes, I rolled my eyes at the fewer / less thing too.

Perhaps I should ask her to write an exemplar that uses less fewer pronouns to circulate within the team so we all understand what to do.

What's especially frustrating is that there is a robust editing phase for all big pieces of work. I'm not above making errors or starting two sentences with the same word, but these things would get picked up in editing before publishing. She claimed she wanted to see if I was "on the right track" and that I had the right "tone" but then nitpicked editing nonsense.

Deep breath.

Right. This isn't about pronoun overuse. This is about her pissing on our turf to let us know that she's the boss. And the most sensible response is to.... what? Let it wash over me, smile politely, and continue to do my job well as I always have?

Definitely just crack on. Id basically ignore her tbh.

ButteredRadishes · 01/06/2025 06:46

LOL I would ask her for a few examples of her joined sentences. Id trick her into writing that she needs to check everything.... then Id overwhelm her and get her to check EVERYTHING.

LakieLady · 01/06/2025 06:44

NestEmptying · 01/06/2025 06:13

Is she running it through AI or even just the Editor on Word and feeding back the results?

My work likes us to use plain English rather than formal language with our customers and that generally means more pronouns and less passive writing. Whatever AI she is using is presumably set to 'formal' writing.

I would ask her what the problem is with pronouns and have her explain why you need to cut down on them. Ask her to give you an example of a piece of work with fewer pronouns and explain why it is better.

Ask for examples for every single thing she asks for.

Our style guide is the same. Shorter sentences are clearer, and running them together to avoid an excess of pronouns can make them harder to understand.

It can be challenging sometimes, as we often have to explain complex legislation to non-specialist colleagues. I resort to bullet points quite often.

AngelaBeverage · 01/06/2025 06:44

Yes, I rolled my eyes at the fewer / less thing too.

Perhaps I should ask her to write an exemplar that uses less fewer pronouns to circulate within the team so we all understand what to do.

What's especially frustrating is that there is a robust editing phase for all big pieces of work. I'm not above making errors or starting two sentences with the same word, but these things would get picked up in editing before publishing. She claimed she wanted to see if I was "on the right track" and that I had the right "tone" but then nitpicked editing nonsense.

Deep breath.

Right. This isn't about pronoun overuse. This is about her pissing on our turf to let us know that she's the boss. And the most sensible response is to.... what? Let it wash over me, smile politely, and continue to do my job well as I always have?

OP posts:
RedBeech · 01/06/2025 06:37

Ask her for an up-to-date copy of the company handbook on house style, as you were unaware of this new rule limiting pronouns, which hasn't been picked up on before.

Or ask her to rewrite the page in the style she is requesting, so you have a management approved guideline to follow.

Why can't you discuss these issues with HR? It sounds as if she is running your work through some generic AI editing tool and is too ignorant to critically evaluate its feedback. As any fule kno who writes specialist copy for a living, those AI programmes aren't fit for purpose.

LakieLady · 01/06/2025 06:37

"You have used two many pronouns. Can you join some sentences together so you use less?"

I hope you picked her up on her use of "less" when she should have used fewer!

Micromanagers are a complete pain in the arse. I had one for a while who was so bad she was known as "Anal Annie". It was her first management job and I think it came from a lack of confidence, as she got much better after a while and she was actually a decent manager apart from that sort of thing. And, like yours OP, she'd never actually done the job the rest of us were doing, so didn't have a feel for what was important and what was just window dressing.

Being micromanaged is soul destroying, so I feel for you. We get an annual supervision meeting with the next manager in line where we can raise this sort of stuff.

FortyElephants · 01/06/2025 06:37

Why can't you raise it with management?