Page 3 | Soft play day before holiday?

BabyDoge · 2025-05-31T19:10:06+00:00

I'm having a bit of a disagreement with DM and would love some other perspectives. We're going on holiday on Monday, and DM has kindly offered to take DC out for a couple of hours so me and DH can crack on with packing. I was very grateful for the offer, until she said she's going to take them to soft play. I asked her if maybe she could take them somewhere else, as I don't think they should be going to a germ factory the day before we go away 🙈 But she thinks I'm being too anxious and it would be fine. AIBU? I have no problem taking them to soft play usually, but the day before we go away just feels like asking for trouble.

NewGoldFox · 31/05/2025 21:30

We used to always pick up some kind of lurgy whenever we went to a soft play!
I don’t think you’re being unreasonable to be a bit sensible just before your hol.

SENNeeds2 · 31/05/2025 21:29

I seem to be going against the grain but having spent many a holiday with a child or children vomiting for several days - I'm with you. my daughter went to a soft play day before holiday ... she left limping a bit which worsened on holiday and while on holiday after an xray we realised she had chipped her big toe bone going down the slide.

Original poster

BabyDoge · 31/05/2025 21:29

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 31/05/2025 21:22

I don’t think you’re unreasonable at all, it’s perfectly reasonable to want to minimise unnecessary germ exposure the day before a holiday.

If your Mum will only take them if going to soft play, I’d maybe just keep the baby at home, and then go to the park later. How much packing could you possible have to do?

Not that much. To be honest I think she's mainly offered so she can spend some time with them before we go, but she's framed it that she's doing me a favour.

OP posts:

Original poster

BabyDoge · 31/05/2025 21:23

BIossomtoes · 31/05/2025 21:06

Best not take them on a plane then.

Show quote history

He still needs a life though? He's had tests, he's perfectly healthy he's just unlucky. If I can try and mitigate the risk by being a bit neurotic about things like this then is it better for him to have the life experiences?

OP posts:

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 31/05/2025 21:22

I don’t think you’re unreasonable at all, it’s perfectly reasonable to want to minimise unnecessary germ exposure the day before a holiday.

If your Mum will only take them if going to soft play, I’d maybe just keep the baby at home, and then go to the park later. How much packing could you possible have to do?

hellotomrw · 31/05/2025 21:20

I agree with you, my kids always get sick after soft play

Original poster

BabyDoge · 31/05/2025 21:20

SnugMintFawn · 31/05/2025 21:04

Definitely VERY normal for 2 year olds!!! 😂

I get you OP, I would be feeling anxious about the soft play too, but I have a history of being overly anxious about things (especially germ-related) so I know my perspective isn’t always great. I’m trying to focus on the most likely outcome in any situation to manage my own anxiety, and in your case, the most likely outcome is that they will be absolutely fine - enjoy the opportunity to pack in peace, if they get ill then cross that bridge when you get to it 😊 hope you have a lovely holiday x

Show quote history

Thank you ☺️ I said in the OP I was interested in other perspectives because I do have form for being overly anxious about things sometimes. But this threw me a little because I was just so sure it was a perfectly sensible thing to ask 😅

OP posts:

Drawings · 31/05/2025 21:19

I am 100% with you OP! My kids have a habit of getting sick before a holiday so we started to do buffer zones. No soft play / in door play / mixing with kids 2 days before our holiday.

We started to book a Monday of Tuesday day to travel so we could have the weekend to hide away.

I sound crazy I know but we have had too many holidays ruined with sickness bugs….we seem to have the worst luck!

Original poster

BabyDoge · 31/05/2025 21:17

Lanzarotelady · 31/05/2025 20:58

So are you only going to go away when you can keep them at home for a week first?

Show quote history

Oh no, we've chosen this second week because most of the other schools are back in so it was a third of the price of going the week before.

OP posts:

Polaopposite · 31/05/2025 21:16

I’m absolutely with you, OP. Mitigating one source of germs seems perfectly reasonable to me before a holiday. I do possibly think too much about this type of thing, but makes sense in my head.

drspouse · 31/05/2025 21:16

I thought you were wanting her to take them somewhere to tire them out - soft play is ideal.

Original poster

BabyDoge · 31/05/2025 21:15

ButteredRadishes · 31/05/2025 20:50

But ... you're taking them to an airport with a
thousands of people in close proximity, in public waiting areas where many people will be coughing, sneezing, touching things with unwashed hands, putting feet on seats, rolling dirty luggage around..... and then shoving them in close quarters for hours with a few hundred people on a plane...

Yeah, definitely soft play is the problem...

Edited

Show quote history

But for them to have the holiday I have to do that, it's unavoidable. Taking them to soft play is avoidable.

OP posts:

Original poster

BabyDoge · 31/05/2025 21:13

PinotDragon86 · 31/05/2025 20:48

For me it would very much depend on the age of the children and if they were at nursery.
My son took a year of nursery to stop being sick on a biweekly basis, often ending up at the hospital due to respiratory type infections (always hit hardest at the weekend and no middle ground between GP and A&E) and being potentially asthmatic. A holiday for us was a very rare and special occasion so I would probably have swerved a soft play if he was under 4 as there was loads of other stuff to do, like walks in the park and such.
In reception after the baptism of fire at nursery I would have been fine about it.
Only you know your child and you are best placed to make the decision.

Thank you. DS has had some tests at the GP, blood tests and the like, and he's perfectly fit and healthy. He's just one of those kids. He's had HFM 3 times, croup bad enough to be hospitalised twice, mesenteric lymphadenitis after a nasty stomach bug.

I've had them both vaccinated against chickenpox so at least that's one less thing to worry about!

OP posts:

middleagedandinarage · 31/05/2025 21:12

You are being ridiculously unreasonable! Don't be surprised if your MIL doesn't offer to take the kids out again.

Bubbinsmakesthree · 31/05/2025 21:12

Gosh this wouldn’t even vaguely cross my mind, I must have children with strong immune systems as I wouldn’t even make the connection.

i guess if you have children who are very prone to catching everything going maybe I would be more cautious.

DepositSaverUpper · 31/05/2025 21:12

Are you keeping them away from school/ pre school.
Travelling in a bubble to get to your destination?

Germs are everywhere.
My dcs have never picked up a bug from soft play and we've been more times than I care to even think about

TinySaltLick · 31/05/2025 21:11

BIossomtoes · 31/05/2025 21:06

Best not take them on a plane then.

Show quote history

Plane is unavoidable though, whereas the soft play is the opposite.

Planes filter the air a bit anyway, sure they aren't perfect but nowhere near soft play levels of grim

Lanzarotelady · 31/05/2025 21:11

BIossomtoes · 31/05/2025 21:06

Best not take them on a plane then.

Show quote history

So you're taking them on a plane, no ventilation whatsoever for what 2.5 hours? People who will have been drinking and will need to urinate more, who probably won't wash their hands? People who will pick their nose, scratch their arse, will touch the surfaces you will touch, they will cough, breathe and sneeze all in a container that has no ventilation ..............

DappledThings · 31/05/2025 21:10

BabyDoge · 31/05/2025 21:06

We may have just been unlucky but they have definitely caught various things on various occasions from soft play. We had to evacuate once when an older child threw up all over the baby section.

Show quote history

Probably confirmation bias. You expect to catch something there because you've bought into this idea they are germ factories so are ascribing various bugs they could have picked up anywhere in the 24 hours before they were at soft play to soft play.

TinySaltLick · 31/05/2025 21:08

Yanbu, soft play is the ultimate germ incubator, it's basically a petri dish, people send their children in there with streaming noses without a care in the world because 'it's just germs' - not a chance I would risk it

BIossomtoes · 31/05/2025 21:06

BabyDoge · 31/05/2025 20:30

Not every time, but DS5 is one of those children who catches everything and he catches it hard. He won't just have a cold, it'll develop into a chest infection, or he won't just have a bit of a stomach bug, he'll be non stop vomiting for 2 weeks.
DD is almost 2 and still very much putting everything in her mouth.

Show quote history

Best not take them on a plane then.

Original poster

BabyDoge · 31/05/2025 21:06

DappledThings · 31/05/2025 20:44

This trope of "soft play is a plague pit full of hundreds of children dripping with every germ known to man" is something I've only seen on Mumsnet. Never heard anyone consider it more likely to make someone sick than anywhere else in real life.

We may have just been unlucky but they have definitely caught various things on various occasions from soft play. We had to evacuate once when an older child threw up all over the baby section.

OP posts:

Toomuch2019 · 31/05/2025 21:05

YANBU - we purposefully avoid soft play before holidays and occasions. Been burnt before and it’s not worth the risk, can’t she take them to the park or somewhere else outdoors instead?

SnugMintFawn · 31/05/2025 21:04

BabyDoge · 31/05/2025 20:50

Oh good, I thought I had something else to be overly anxious about 🤣

Show quote history

Definitely VERY normal for 2 year olds!!! 😂

I get you OP, I would be feeling anxious about the soft play too, but I have a history of being overly anxious about things (especially germ-related) so I know my perspective isn’t always great. I’m trying to focus on the most likely outcome in any situation to manage my own anxiety, and in your case, the most likely outcome is that they will be absolutely fine - enjoy the opportunity to pack in peace, if they get ill then cross that bridge when you get to it 😊 hope you have a lovely holiday x

Original poster

BabyDoge · 31/05/2025 21:03

Strawred · 31/05/2025 20:38

Well I have a severe phobia of vomiting so I’d be the same as you

Thanks, I'm sorry you have that it's terrible. I don't know if I can be classed as an emetophobe because I don't actually mind being sick myself, but I can't handle it when others are.

OP posts: