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AIBU?

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Original poster

I was evicted from a WhatsApp group with grown women!

68 replies

THEP0PE · 31/05/2025 19:56

I feel like a bloody child. Big group of women, 15 of us. Met online but had met a few of the women IRL. Can’t think of anything I’ve done to offend anyone. We chatted every day then out of the blue, three of us just got chucked out. No conversation, no explanation. I really valued their friendship too.

OP posts:
Supergirl1958 · 31/05/2025 22:53

THEP0PE · 31/05/2025 19:56

I feel like a bloody child. Big group of women, 15 of us. Met online but had met a few of the women IRL. Can’t think of anything I’ve done to offend anyone. We chatted every day then out of the blue, three of us just got chucked out. No conversation, no explanation. I really valued their friendship too.

Hoping you’re ok? Similar happened to me about five years ago. A few of us were having babies around the same time. I am a teacher and happened to defend teachers and Covid rules and one of them didn’t like it. I ran an errand and when I got back, I had been deleted from the what’s app group and blocked on social media. I was soo upset..

BrickBiscuit · 31/05/2025 22:36

Funnywonder · 31/05/2025 22:29

Yeah, me too. Awful, patronising turn of phrase.

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But isn’t it being used somewhat ironically? It being a patronising phrase, using it to imply the recipient is perhaps not behaving like a grown-up? In order to nudge them into doing so?

Funnywonder · 31/05/2025 22:29

Threepiece · 31/05/2025 21:53

I cringe inside out for grown women that tell other grown women to ‘use their words!’

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Yeah, me too. Awful, patronising turn of phrase.

TaylorSwish · 31/05/2025 22:16

m00rfarm · 31/05/2025 21:25

Set up another whatsapp group with a similar name, invite all the people in the other group and see who declines.

This is a great idea Jessica Fletcher.

TaylorSwish · 31/05/2025 22:14

MzHz · 31/05/2025 20:22

This

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Call it ‘Best Mums Groupchat’

mindutopia · 31/05/2025 22:08

It wasn’t you who posted about this previously and one of the women hitting on you was it? I can see if there was some tension of that sort, people might decide to no longer have certain people in the group. Though on the face of it, it doesn’t sound like you’ve done anything wrong.

loropianalover · 31/05/2025 22:03

SupposesRoses · 31/05/2025 22:01

There’s a bug in WhatsApp that randomly removes people. I’ve seen it in several groups I’m in over the last month.

But surely it gets picked up on right away and the people re-added? When you’re in a WhatsApp group it says ‘Mary left the group’ etc. in the same area as the actual messages/chat.

2B2G · 31/05/2025 22:03

@NoVibrato I'm laughing at myself clearly

SupposesRoses · 31/05/2025 22:01

There’s a bug in WhatsApp that randomly removes people. I’ve seen it in several groups I’m in over the last month.

Booboobagins · 31/05/2025 21:59

I'm an admin in a women's group. There are 18 of us. Around 8 of us are admins. We are all except 2 becoming good friends - very active - we have regular book club and walking club and almost every week there's a festival, weekend away, theatre, cinema, disco etc. We would never kicked anyone's out without talking to.them. I doubt you'll get anywhere with your admin, but I would try to determine why they dont think your right for the group. They might have settled on a specific number of members and you didn't make the number cut. It sounds callous to me. I'd also get in touch with others who'd been kicked out abd see if the 3 of you can create a small group who can chat and maybe meet up.

Sending you a hug. It does not sound like they've been fair to you at all.

Threepiece · 31/05/2025 21:53

KnewYearKnewMe · 31/05/2025 20:39

Do you feel superior being so nasty and condescending to a stranger on the internet?

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I cringe inside out for grown women that tell other grown women to ‘use their words!’

Endofyear · 31/05/2025 21:49

Can you message one of the admins of the group privately and ask why? If you can't think of any comment that you've made that might have caused upset, it might just be a mistake?

NoVibrato · 31/05/2025 21:35

2B2G · 31/05/2025 20:44

This is why I made the decision to not have any friends at all years ago. Cannot be bothered with literally any kind of drama and childishness. I just like to chill lol

Why are you "laughing out loud" at somebody who is obviously upset?

Mary46 · 31/05/2025 21:32

Always drama in big groups.. can you ask admin why. Was there a fallout?

m00rfarm · 31/05/2025 21:25

Set up another whatsapp group with a similar name, invite all the people in the other group and see who declines.

Lala721 · 31/05/2025 21:17

Sadly a lot of women behave this way ..no explanation tbh whenever I have broached a subject with a friend about something I’m upset about it’s often met with defensiveness and denial.yes they should have spoke to you it’s crap not knowing what ‘you’ve done ‘

TipsyRaven247 · 31/05/2025 21:10

You must have antagonised them at some point and you don't even remember when.

godmum56 · 31/05/2025 21:08

I had a phase where all my whatsapp messages would pop up in a bunch every few days.

GauntJudy · 31/05/2025 21:06

It's probably an accident if there's been no obvious drama before the booting off. Definitely ask someone

Ellie1015 · 31/05/2025 21:03

If no issues I would expect you have been removed by accident or some sort of technical issue. Get in touch with someone.

CalicoPusscat · 31/05/2025 21:00

2B2G · 31/05/2025 20:44

This is why I made the decision to not have any friends at all years ago. Cannot be bothered with literally any kind of drama and childishness. I just like to chill lol

Friends can be great though, they're your family of choice! If any let you down you just back off.

@THEP0PE ask someone from the group.

Londonrach1 · 31/05/2025 20:55

Whatsapp can do this randomly...message the admin and ask but it might be an issue with WhatsApp

SteakBakesAndHotTakes · 31/05/2025 20:53

My whatsapp randomly updated the other day. Sometimes it can glitch. Message the group admin and check?

2B2G · 31/05/2025 20:44

This is why I made the decision to not have any friends at all years ago. Cannot be bothered with literally any kind of drama and childishness. I just like to chill lol

KnewYearKnewMe · 31/05/2025 20:39

BallerinaRadio · 31/05/2025 20:11

Use your words and ask them?

Do you feel superior being so nasty and condescending to a stranger on the internet?