Bitchy work colleague I’d had enough!

Agree that the 'peacemaker' is toxic: any true peacemaker knows to stay well out of a conflict that's not her business. Of course her response made you feel worse.

Well done on standing up for yourself in such an appropriate and constructive way. You simply called out a lie about yourself as not true. You may be feeling uncomfortable about it now because confrontation IS hard and upsetting. But how would you be feeling if you'd let the lie go unchallenged in a public setting? I'm guessing worse.

In my experience people see clearly who's bullshitting, who's unreasonable. However hard it was/is, you should be glad you were firm and professional. It's whats required in this workplace setting.

I recently discovered I have a reputation for being a bit difficult and very assertive at work. I used to be a total doormat and yes person and nearly burnt myself out and I’ve been practicing boundaries. I guess people noticed 😆. Boundaries are hard at first and it takes a bit of practice to assert them without being a tiny bit of a dick. Still the more you practice the better you get.

Ergh I hate those 'dominate with kindness' types, always narcissistic. @Grex's advice is great.

Give the peacemaker a large wooden spoon.

This advice is worth repeating.
Practice it, so she learns to keep away from you.
She's a shit stirrer.
She will hate you seeing through her.

The peacemaker is not a peacemaker though is she?
She's the one making a drama out of nothing and spreading gossip.

You did nothing wrong. Just go in on Monday as usual and hold your head up.
If the gossip tries to talk to you about it again just shut her down.

I was just about to post the same. Nothing peaceful about her!

Peacemaker my eye, sounds like a passive aggressive shit stirrer.

Do not feel bad - you stuck up for yourself and how is that a bad thing?

The fact your colleague was shocked speaks volumes.

Get more comfortable being the “grumpy woman”. I’m sure that the majority of your colleagues don’t see you as one, but I bet some of them were silently cheering you on in agreement! You might have given other people food for thought about sticking up for themselves too. You don’t need everyone to like you, especially someone you don’t like yourself x

Don't give this "peacemaker" oxygen. That sort of person HATES being called out, so if she comes fussing on Monday with are you OK: "Of course, why wouldn't I be?".
If she says you were emotional etc "Are you trying to create drama?" and wait patiently for an answer. In future, every single time just look quizzical "That was nothing, are you trying to make a drama out of it?". She'll learn to keep away.

Toxic simpering false behaviour.

I worked with someone like that, fortunately not closely, but after years of being so sweet and gentle, and me not buying it for a minute, turns out she was absolutely toxic and quietly pouring poison into the ear of her boss about her colleagues.

He mistakenly quoted her poison to another colleague, (the wrong person as it turned out and it really blew up,) with a few drinks in him and suddenly she was completely exposed.

Be very very wary.
Do not say a word to her that can be misconstrued or misquoted.

Yes, it doesn't take much.

Apparently I look like butter wouldn't melt, and am generally agreeable and friendly, so perhaps it comes as more of a shock. TBH though some people get intimidated by knowledge and competence never mind just not being a pushover.

The "peace maker" is a gossip, who is dramatising your very reasonable response to someone who was undermining you. It's difficult to be assertive and set boundaries for yourself, especially if you find confrontation difficult, but it's like a muscle, the more you do it, the easier it gets. Don't lose faith in yourself, You're the strong one in this scenario. Breeze in on Monday, take it all in your stride, Your a professional.

Well done. But I don’t this is bitchness. It’s arse covering and looking for ways to blame other people. Which you have circumvented. Stick to your guns and don’t, whatever you do, get drawn into conversation about it.

This.

Hopefully now you’ve spoken out it’ll give others the confidence to do the same in future.

Far better to be seen as grumpy than a pushover, any day!

Assuming peacemaker is not your manager, if they mention it again next week just close it down immediately and don't engage. By keep mentioning it they are (intentionally or otherwise) stirring the pot. Just let it blow over. But well done you for standing up for yourself!!

Peacemake is absolutely toxic.

Be very wary of her inserting herself and creating drama.

Dial everything down and refuse to allow her to tell you how you feel or how your reacted.

She is dangerous and I would suspect a two faced bitch.
Avoid.

Keep notes of whats going on.
On monday do not discuss further.
Dismiss it as over and if she tries to discuss ask her why she is going on about it.

Whats your manager like?
Perhaps a chat where you can casually mention your discomfort.

Good for you for standing up for yourself. You did the right thing. But all of this sounds dysfunctional. Why is this coworker allowed to spread all this toxicity. Why is this "peace maker" coworker trying to pacify them? Where is your manager in all this?

I think a good conversation with your manager is in order. I would also look into getting another job. Things should never have progressed to this point.

Side note: Please don't use misogynist slurs to describe other women, no matter how unreasonable they are. It just feeds into the patriarchy.

This ‘peacemaker’ sounds tiresome aswell as your other colleague. You haven’t done anything wrong. I really wish I had of stood up for myself in the same way in the past. I’m proud of you!

Yes. My ‘don’t fuck with me’ reputation, in reality based on nothing more than a few minor instances of assertiveness at meetings when I was new) has been very useful.

I think I'd find Peacemaker more annoying. Is the bitchy colleague male?

I have found myself trodden on at work because I am a people pleaser. There is something magnificently liberating about what you did, and I think it will change you for the better. Once you've justifiably asserted yourself professionally, the horrible person and others will take note that you're not a walkover - good for you!