To have thought our lower income was enough?

No I have paid it off now. Hence why I can afford to earn less. It was tight when kids were were small though. The mortgage was around 40% of my income but we just lived more simply.

Lots of variables - essential transport, type of diet , social environment for the children as that can affect expectations- but quite a normal sort of budget and people are managing and having sone treats and holidays

Absolute essential outgoings including food is £3235 for us with a £1300 mortgage. We don't have car payments, or high childcare costs. Having £265 to cover any presents, kids activities, clothes, memberships, emergency repairs, etc would be extremely tight and there'd be no chance of a holiday ever

When we started our outgoings were roughly 1/3 mortgage (incl overpayment), 1/3 living costs, 1/3 savings and we lived comfortably
We moved and had a child stopped overpaying our mortgage and our outgoings were roughly 1/4 mortgage, 1/4 living costs, 1/4 nursery and 1/4 savings

Child is now in school but I have been made redundant and we are very glad to have our mortgage and living costs to be covered by one salary. I found out I was pregnant the same day I lost my job and we are looking at 18+m on a single salary and very glad we went for a house towards the lower end of our budget as it's given us a bit of breathing room now.

I would look at the total expenditure for running the house for the year and affordability on either salary on it's own. The redundancy in my company came out of the blue, they announced they were having my team and within 3 weeks I was unemployed!

Our mortgage payment is that and we would definitely struggle if our income dropped by 700 to 3500/month but if you can save 900/month with 810 mortgage at the moment then a1300 mortgage seems fine for you and you would still have 400/month for saving and house DIY etc

I have found the 1/3 of your income idea ok.

However, with food, utilities, transport and council tax being higher now there is an absolute amount you need left with. There's only so little you can eat. You should know how much those essential costs are already?.

I also think things like how the earnings are split matter. Are you relying heavily on one person being fit to work and not made redundant.

Whether you have savings for a rainy day or would moving wipe out every penny, so a boiler breaking is a big deal.

Whether you realistically will get pay rises or have hit peak career..

What your plan is if interest rates go up by the end of a fix.

@FedupofArsenalgame I’m not saying it isn’t doable, but we wouldn’t have the same lifestyle we do now if we had a £3.5k income (our income is higher, so we don’t have to worry about money/watch what we spend).

I know we’re very lucky, and lifestyle creep has definitely been a factor in why £3.5k would feel tight for us - but part of lifestyle creep is what the OP is considering - buying the bigger house because you can, which makes other bills increase.

Before the energy crisis we spent a fraction of that on utilities, and I still thought it was too much! Our house isn’t even warm in winter 😂. Bloody putin.

Our mortgage is £1200 a month and our take home is £5500 pcm. £3500 would seem a bit low if I’m honest.

I actually don't think it is possible now that I've looked properly.

You would be spending all of your money on the house leaving very little left over to actually enjoy life.

It depends what you want though, our lifestyle includes netflix, gym, pets, Spotify, phones and we aren't frugal on the food shopping. I can buy a lamb leg for a roast if I fancy it and 2 bottles of wine to go with it. I have always said I will only get a bigger house if we can still have the same lifestyle we do now without having to cut back but perhaps you are more willing to be frugal with your food shop, don't need a gym membership.

Go through your bank statements, add up everything you have paid for the whole of 2025 so far but use the higher figures for the mortgage, don't forget to increase council tax, bills, insurances because of the increase in the size of the house. Also factor in interest rises in the future and your children costing more but you can also factor in pay increases if they are likely too.

Wow id think that was very easy to do.

My income isy nearly 2k per month lower than hours but I don't have the £1100 mortgage. If I did it would still leave me nearly £900 a month better off then I am now

. Although my bills are not so ridiculous. Council tax is £125 ( band c with 25% discount ') and utilities are a fraction of that.

Wouldn't the banks or other mortgage people be better to advise than a forum?

Our mortgage is £1100 and we’d find it tight on £3,500 a month but our fixed bills are high (gas/water/elec are c £400 a month and council tax is a ludicrous £413 although that’s for 10 months of the year). Add in food, internet, phones, kids activities (but no childcare) and we wouldn’t be living the same lifestyle that we do now.

I’d agree with others, put the extra aside for 6 months and see how you feel/what unexpected expenses crop up.

We could live on that, as in we would eat and have heat and power and all the basics, but it would be a massive change in standard of life. We would have to cut out a lot of things that we enjoy, reduce holidays, trips, stuff we do for ourselves, kids classes, etc. If you live very frugally and have no desire to change that then it might be doable. But you will be committing to that kind of lifestyle for the long term.

Have you done a proper budget that includes absolutely everything? As if you’re putting money aside for emergency funds, holidays, car and home maintenance, new clothes, Christmas, birthdays, personal care such as haircuts, dentist, boiler maintenance, replacing tech and household items, all that kind of stuff, that’s hundreds of pounds a month over and above what your ‘bills’ are. And not accounting for stuff like this is often why people can’t work out why they don’t ever have any money leftover when on paper they earn X amount more than their bills.

We’ve got an income of 4500 and mortgage of 1200. It feels tight sometimes but that’s also because of other bills that have increased, some because of the house size that mortgages enables. We also do have a decent lifestyle - ‘tight’ is more holidays, new clothes etc.
but, we’re in it for the long term and it’ll get easier as the ltv improves. We’re also probably over insured in several places which drives bills up

Our take home is around 4200, just a couple with no kids, I wouldn't be comfortable with a mortgage as high as that... Ours is around 750 currently.

Although I'm liking this thread saying actually it's fine, because no doubt when we remortgage, our mortgage will get as high as that 😁 we don't have any other huge outgoings, I just like to be able to save lots and feel secure.

I wouldn’t be comfortable with that, but I don’t think it’s impossible. It’s a “we could manage if we’re careful” situation, rather than a comfortable one or one where you’re building savings.

Once you’ve paid the essential bills, it doesn’t leave a lot of money for things like days out, clothing, emergency repairs, savings etc.

Sorry - just realised what you’re asking. When the kids were little out mortgage was £750 a month, DH was on 25k. The youngest was sick and I was at home minding them.
there were many days hours - it was really really tough. I wish you well - there’s a light there!

My take home is 4.7k - I work 4 days a week.😀 (v lucky)
DH not currently working. We don’t have to pay for cars / kids care as kids / cars are old!
We don’t live like lords but are OK.we have 38k in savings (redundancy payment) when DH is working i think we’ll save almost all that. Mortgage on a 500k house is 600 a month. I’m going to overpay it so I can retire early ! I’m also oh so v tired 😭

You’re not mad at all — £3,500 after tax with a £1,200–£1,300 mortgage is generally manageable, assuming no major debts or unusually high expenses. That’s around 35% of your take-home pay, which is well within most lenders’ affordability criteria.

A lot of the posts you’re seeing probably involve people with much higher lifestyle costs, childcare fees, or debt commitments — context matters. If your other expenses are reasonable, you’re likely in a good position. Don’t let other people’s panic shake your confidence unnecessarily.

It’s a bit higher than I’d personally go, but still doable. We are a family of 4 and spend an average of 2500 per month excluding mortgage. No childcare bills.

It depends on your lifestyle and circumstances doesn't it. At one point my mortgage was £1200 and my monthly income was £2400. It was completely fine. All my bills were only about £300 back then and as a single person with no dependents, no car, no commuting costs and spending about £40/wk on food I had plenty of money for holidays, savings and all the hobbies I wanted to do.

If my income and mortgage was that now, with the much higher cost of living, kids, car, husband etc I'd be massively struggling.

Household income of 65K before tax, pensions, NI and Student Loan. After it’s much less. I earn 40k but have earnt much less in the past. Earning more meens my out goings are far more than when I worked for minimum wage. Have to run a car for my job as part of my contract, have to pay £100 a month to student loans and can’t get help with childcare costs etc. At minimum wage I didn’t need to run a car, didn’t pay student loans and got significant help with childcare. Taking all that into account what comes in now is financially the same as when I worked for minimum wage.

We can have up to 325k mortgages for a house but just couldn’t afford the repayments on this or for me to take maternity. Plus would need a very long mortgage and I would struggle to do full time hours in my job at 67! Whilst we might just manage the repayments we would have very little ability to save for any issues with a house.

Looking at spending 160K-200k on a house. We would afford the repayments, take an 25 year mortgage meening we could reduce hours towards end of our working ahe and be able to save some money for any issues such as boiler/roof etc. This would still put us at needing to find an extra £300-£400 a month.

Most my friends with very lovely houses have paid very little off as they constantly remortgage and take money back to pay for maintenance. It all got to be paid in the end.