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Original poster

“Paedophile hunters”

239 replies

Yellowdaffodilss · 28/05/2025 20:32

I remember quite a few years ago now, these paedophile hunter’s started appearing on social media. Videos of them meeting people who had been talking to what they believed were underage children. I remember thinking , oh wow they’re out there protecting our children. Maybe a naive view , I don’t know.

But now , more and more , I see it becoming a regular thing and I am seeing time and time again that the so called predators they catch ( not all the time, there are times that they are grown adults knowing what they’re doing ) are very clearly people with additional needs / autism. I find it disturbing to watch - I have seen young adults panicking and not really knowing what they’re doing or the implications . It’s clear that the messages in the videos I have seen are between the “ culprit” and an ‘underage child’ discussing meeting up , when yes they have been clear they are underage but it is also clear that it has not been sexual talk and these people are not understanding that what they are doing is wrong.

I remember years ago my sister and her friend talking to a lad of around 19. My sister and her friend were chatting and asking if the lad liked the friend and he was inviting them around to his house for a sleepover and to watch movies. ( my sister told my mom as she was worried ) I went through all the messages and could see it was not sexual . This lad thought they were friends . I looked at his profile and he was clearly autistic and his emotional and mental age was probably the same as my sister and her friend. I spoke to his mother who was so thankful that I messaged and confirmed he was quite severely autistic.

My son is autistic and always been drawn to girls as friends rather than boys . He also always gets on with those younger because he is on their level more. He wouldn’t even know how to talk sexually - he’s got a very limited understanding. I can’t stop him having a phone , he’s now 18 . Luckily I’m very aware and have spoken to him about this and keep tabs on him but it’s very hard. This kind of thing really worries me.

It makes me think whether these groups are doing more harm than good. They’re outing people publicly , and for those who are vulnerable with no understanding then it could do so much harm. I get that parents should be monitoring phone use but quite frankly not all parents do.

I do also wonder - can charges be made if there is no ‘real’ victim - it’s an adult they’re talking to … I guess it could get the culprits investigated more and maybe find out more things but other than that is it not just vigilante behaviour? And also , is their real good intention there from all of them or is it a case of getting social media famous ? Could it even be that they target those who they can see are more vulnerable as it will be an easy ‘catch’ ?

OP posts:
Original poster
Yellowdaffodilss · 29/05/2025 08:28

ExpectoOff · 29/05/2025 00:10

Sorry but there is absolutely no need for an adult, additional needs or not to be texting with and befriending children. I say this as someone who has a child with severe SEN and a husband with autism. Staying away from children is something I will always teach my DS as he gets older. He may relate with them more in his head but it doesn’t mean it’ll be okay for him to befriend them, and it’ll also save him from any allegations.

I will always teach my children to be kind but I absolutely would not be happy with them engaging in a friendship with any type of adult. People with additional needs can be predators too.

I totally get what you are saying - but do you think your DC would be able to just know that it’s inappropriate without you teaching him ? There are people out there who don’t have that guidance and those are the ones vulnerable to this

OP posts:
Original poster
Yellowdaffodilss · 29/05/2025 08:25

OhNoTheBridgeIsDown · 29/05/2025 07:04

I’ve always felt really uncomfortable that so many autistism social groups lump teens and young adults together. There may be delays, but it sounds like a safeguarding nightmare. A 25 year old is still an adult even if their behaviour aligns with young teenagers.

The whole language around teens and young adults in autism and mental health care leaves me cold tbh, and leaves big gaps for safeguarding to be overlooked.

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Yes I mentioned it. My son was in one, the age range was 13-25. We moved him to a 16+ that was much better and once he turned 18 there was an 18+ for him to kind of graduate too. It’s so much more appropriate.

Its difficult because in that wide age range there are so many who are so similar cognitively but realistically we have to teach our children - who won’t understand without teaching - that adult / child friendships aren’t appropriate so how can we allow them in a group ?

OP posts:
Original poster
Yellowdaffodilss · 29/05/2025 08:21

x2boys · 28/05/2025 23:07

Yeah I'm not buying that ,we have four special schools in my LA ,two primary, two secondary,
Teens at the school for kids with moderate to severe learning disabilities, do have relationships ,sometimes with their peers but they are the like in all schools but they are of a similar age and cognitive.

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So because you know of 4 schools where the students are similar and able to have relationships then that means no autistic person of 25 can actually have the same cognitive abilities as someone who is 14 ? Really?

OP posts:
ShakeUpYourTiredEyes · 29/05/2025 08:04

Cheffymcchef · 28/05/2025 23:27

I agree. They don’t think of the connotations of putting it out online. Your son will likely have to change his name by deed poll.

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Thank you, We're looking in to it, it was the first thing my son asked. He's under 16 so needs the permission of that absolute disgusting thing or at least need to be able to prove that I've asked before I get a court order for a judge to over rule it, because no way will his sperms doner allow it he's a control freak and has no consideration for his son. The last thing I want to do is make contact of any kind with him or his family though or let him have an inclin of anything about my son. I have a solicitors appointment next week and will see what happens from there.

OhNoTheBridgeIsDown · 29/05/2025 07:04

HuffleMyPuffle · 28/05/2025 23:11

Not schools, social clubs
Someone else mentioned it upthread too

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I’ve always felt really uncomfortable that so many autistism social groups lump teens and young adults together. There may be delays, but it sounds like a safeguarding nightmare. A 25 year old is still an adult even if their behaviour aligns with young teenagers.

The whole language around teens and young adults in autism and mental health care leaves me cold tbh, and leaves big gaps for safeguarding to be overlooked.

Shamsamvanybanhatyi · 29/05/2025 03:55

BDG007 · 28/05/2025 20:39

I think you make a very good point and these groups are just vigilantes that will be looking videos that will get them the most clicks rather than actually trying to investigate the serious offenders.

I'm pretty sure that a crime is committed by someone if they go to meet an underaged person for sex even if they don't exist. However, if these untrained "hunters" are just trying to entrap people then they may not get any evidence that could be used in a court anyway.

I think it's the sort of thing for trained professionals to do and not TikTok content creators

Untrained hunters often have an eye for detail, for example looking at a person’s previous chat which potential pedo person will have usually forgotten about, however it will usually always expose them for being seedy, like admitting they visit sex clubs and brothels.

ExpectoOff · 29/05/2025 00:10

Sorry but there is absolutely no need for an adult, additional needs or not to be texting with and befriending children. I say this as someone who has a child with severe SEN and a husband with autism. Staying away from children is something I will always teach my DS as he gets older. He may relate with them more in his head but it doesn’t mean it’ll be okay for him to befriend them, and it’ll also save him from any allegations.

I will always teach my children to be kind but I absolutely would not be happy with them engaging in a friendship with any type of adult. People with additional needs can be predators too.

Lardychops · 29/05/2025 00:03

YouWillFindMeInTheGarden · 28/05/2025 23:41

They don’t need to remove it but they can add restrictions on devices

If your child has a camera phone and social media - WhatsApp, insta, snap, tik tok, fb, messenger etc etc they can be groomed or exploited online.
Controls around accessing adult material such as pornography or violent content via a search are also easily circumvented by young people who know waaay more than their parents - besides said material will be shared anyway through other means If a child wishes to see it - eg explicit videos sent as a message by WhatsApp.

Children who cannot keep themselves safe online simply must not be online and their access needs removing.

Sadly some parents appear more afraid of doing this and children kicking off, than of the risk to their child if they do not.
Mind baffling.

Lardychops · 28/05/2025 23:51

TheFormidableMrsC · 28/05/2025 23:26

To add, my son is 14. I’d say he was around 4 years behind in development. He prefers friendships with younger kids as he can cope with that. He can’t cope or keep up with kids of his own age. I am aware he still has feelings of a pubescent teen and I worry about that obviously!

Yes, I imagine you do and will need to prevent them from forming as friendships between 14 year olds and 10 years olds are not appropriate nor are 15 and 11 and 16 and 12. Not in real life nor online.

Cheffymcchef · 28/05/2025 23:49

Lardychops · 28/05/2025 23:47

Sadly in that case, while they are children and where parents have control, their access to the internet/social media must be severely restricted/monitored to protect them and others then.

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She’s talking rubbish and I can guarantee has met very few autistic folk in her life

Cheffymcchef · 28/05/2025 23:48

@TheFormidableMrsCposts like this are infuriating. Not all autistic people behave like this and just accept what they’re told.

Lardychops · 28/05/2025 23:47

TheFormidableMrsC · 28/05/2025 23:32

I agree with you. But autistic people won’t react in the way you describe. They will just accept what they’re told 🤷🏻‍♀️

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Sadly in that case, while they are children and where parents have control, their access to the internet/social media must be severely restricted/monitored to protect them and others then.

YouWillFindMeInTheGarden · 28/05/2025 23:41

They don’t need to remove it but they can add restrictions on devices

Sworkmum · 28/05/2025 23:40

The people who do this are awful.

It is very complicated and there should be the correct processes in place for publicising such things. I have met people caught up in these situations, family members, children etc whose lives have been ruined. There are innocent victims harmed through this, so those saying they catch without victims isn’t true. the families or friends of the people caught are often victims and face public scrutiny when they have done no wrong.

ND/SN also complicates things, it’s not so straightforward in these situations either. There are professionals in place for these crimes for a reason and if these people really wanted to help they can pass any info on to be dealt with appropriately. Streaming online and posting in public is not ok.

Lardychops · 28/05/2025 23:39

bombastix · 28/05/2025 23:09

Neurodivergence does not mean there not a sex drive! Nor does it mean that there is no understanding of what is not appropriate. If your children or young adults fall into the category of not understanding, being on the internet is not for them

Trying to explain that daily to parents of ND/SEN children is like smashing your head against a wall.
By sexual maturity most of the children we are talking about are already massively screen addicted and their life revolves around the online world.
Parents will not implement the basic safeguards we recommend or monitor use, let alone remove the damn tech which often proves to be catastrophic.

Cheffymcchef · 28/05/2025 23:38

CalleOcho · 28/05/2025 23:37

Trigger warning - SH

YANBU OP.

The live streams and videos of these hunters catching these adults speaking to underaged decoys do more harm than good.

The hunters aren’t arsed about the safety and welfare of children. They care more about their online persona and how many likes/shares etc they get and the uproar of a mob mentality in the comments inciting violence.

I watched one of these live videos out of sheer curiosity once and the man who was caught, ended up grabbing a knife/razor and slashed at his own neck. Was disturbing to see. I’m sure the video is still available somewhere on Twitter/X.

Parents, carers, schools, social workers etc. need to really step up a notch with online safety. So many children have iPhones and access to all apps and corners of the internet.

If people really want to ensure children are safe from paedophiles they would take away their children’s smart phones, ban them from using the Internet unsupervised whilst young and stop posting pictures of their kids on Facebook, Instagram, TikTok etc.

You can’t ban the internet from children and think that’ll help matters. You need to educate them to use it safety, know what to do if someone untoward contacts them online.

CalleOcho · 28/05/2025 23:37

Trigger warning - SH

YANBU OP.

The live streams and videos of these hunters catching these adults speaking to underaged decoys do more harm than good.

The hunters aren’t arsed about the safety and welfare of children. They care more about their online persona and how many likes/shares etc they get and the uproar of a mob mentality in the comments inciting violence.

I watched one of these live videos out of sheer curiosity once and the man who was caught, ended up grabbing a knife/razor and slashed at his own neck. Was disturbing to see. I’m sure the video is still available somewhere on Twitter/X.

Parents, carers, schools, social workers etc. need to really step up a notch with online safety. So many children have iPhones and access to all apps and corners of the internet.

If people really want to ensure children are safe from paedophiles they would take away their children’s smart phones, ban them from using the Internet unsupervised whilst young and stop posting pictures of their kids on Facebook, Instagram, TikTok etc.

Mumof2amazingasdkiddos · 28/05/2025 23:36

Lardychops · 28/05/2025 23:30

Your friends child sounds a like a prime target for online grooming and or CSE.

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Yes unfortunately, my friend has had the conversation about how older people could pretend to be his age or a bit older but she's never spoken to him (to the best of my knowledge) that people might pretend to be quite a bit younger than him, which obviously changes the point of view from him being a victim to him being put in the position of appearing to be the predator.
He is aware of body privacy and not sharing photos/videos/appearing on live chat that show anything below his neck/shoulders, so basically face only

YouWillFindMeInTheGarden · 28/05/2025 23:35

ACynicalDad · 28/05/2025 22:53

I think they fill a void being left by police; if the police did more of this and caught a lot more of these people, then the groups wouldn't exist. Given that they are going to do it, ideally, there would be some training, but that would be hugely problematic. Apart from funding the police properly, I'm not sure how they can be stopped.

As I previously posted, are you aware that the special sex offenders prisons are full to bursting? The police ARE busy prosecuting but there’s so so many…. And it’s down to cps who gets sentenced

theres not enough police, not enough prisons ( just for this group of offenders, no other group gets their own prison) and there’s simply too many predators… as well as the historical ones

ExercicenformedeZ · 28/05/2025 23:33

Cheffymcchef · 28/05/2025 23:30

You probably didn’t realise there wasn’t anything creepy or wrong about it because you were so young. At 19, would you have willingly slept with a 15 year old boy?

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Probably not, although girls tend to be more mature than boys in their teens, so it isn't really a fair comparison.

TheFormidableMrsC · 28/05/2025 23:32

Lardychops · 28/05/2025 23:28

Young people lie about their age. The onus is on the ‘of age’ person in that relationship to verify they are 100 percent telling the truth before they engage in any form of sexually activity.

Anyone who does not have ‘ capacity’ to understand that should not have access to social media where they can meet people and then behave inappropriately or illegally in some cases.

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I agree with you. But autistic people won’t react in the way you describe. They will just accept what they’re told 🤷🏻‍♀️

Itsdifficulttodomyjobsometimes · 28/05/2025 23:31

ACynicalDad · 28/05/2025 22:53

I think they fill a void being left by police; if the police did more of this and caught a lot more of these people, then the groups wouldn't exist. Given that they are going to do it, ideally, there would be some training, but that would be hugely problematic. Apart from funding the police properly, I'm not sure how they can be stopped.

The police are catching people all the time. In the majority of cases it just doesn't get publicised.
Reoffending is an issue and as many have commented on this thread, how do you deal with that.

Lardychops · 28/05/2025 23:30

Mumof2amazingasdkiddos · 28/05/2025 23:29

@Yellowdaffodilss I'm not sure why quite a few PP have missed the point of your post as I think you've been very clear in the type of circumstances you're talking about. I just wanted to say I've not really watched any of these videos although I am aware of them and I haven't really given it much thought before I read your post.

I have a 5yr old DS who has SN and whilst obviously he is far too young to be chatting to anyone on social media it has made me aware of the need to educate him specifically about how innocent conversations with underage people could be interpreted when he does become of the age where he could be chatting online so thank you.

I'll also be ensuring I have the conversation with my friend who has a 16yr old DC who is very innocent and spends a lot of time chatting online to others (pretty much unmonitored I believe) to make sure she talks to him, as he would be exactly like the person you've described in the video you saw, delighted to make a new friend and has no idea about sex or sexual conversations and would be devastated if he was targeted by these wannabe vigilantes

Your friends child sounds a like a prime target for online grooming and or CSE.

Cheffymcchef · 28/05/2025 23:30

ExercicenformedeZ · 28/05/2025 23:29

He was 19 when it happened. Not ideal, perhaps, but hardly shocking and certainly not pedophilic. I was 15 when I lost my virginity to a 19 year old, there was nothing creepy or wrong about it at all.

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You probably didn’t realise there wasn’t anything creepy or wrong about it because you were so young. At 19, would you have willingly slept with a 15 year old boy?