To think we CAN live on the mortgage

I've not read the full thread but what you've quoted as your net salaries don't add up to £10.5k.

Our monthly income is £10.5k and our mortgage is lower but we put a lot in savings every month. We could manage on your mortgage but our savings would take a big knock.

We have two kids, one at nursery (although starting (state) school soon!)

You literally got sh*tty with people saying your job was really stressful, it sounds like you love it. Maybe your stressful job is causing your anger. Life’s too short to work a stressful job for 40 hours a week.

We have a similar net monthly income and commit £3100 to the mortgage each month (£600 of that is overpayment).
As other PP have said it’s the maintenance costs of the ‘big house’ that have been a bit of an eye opener - we pay over £400 per month gas and electric for example and because of the type of property we’ve had to use a specialist insurer (hopefully you won’t have this issue!).
It’ll feel tighter than it is for a while because the amounts involved sound enormous (another working class girl made good over here!) but as long as the percentages are right as soon as you’re free of the nursery costs and can put that into savings it should all feel much more comfortable.
Oh and this thread is the perfect example of why people don’t talk about money - the fact that you and your partner will pay more in tax and national insurance in a year than a lot of people earn seems to be completely unacknowledged by those rushing to slate you!

I guess you’re in a bit of a catch 22 because you’re in a very expensive area.

My main concern would be if your DH lost his job. Unlikely, but could it be possible? It’s the million dollar question. There are insurances but they are very expensive.

It’s very much a positive that the house doesn’t need any work, because projects always eat up a lot of money.

It would be well worth researching different lenders.

No advice but there are some funny comments on here - people don't just earn large salaries without working for them (usually anyway) and not only poor people can ask for advice that is why it is a forum! Op is totally owning the batshit comments - favourite ever My room, my thread!!!

I think it's dependent on your age/future earnings. If you are in jobs where your income is going to increase, then quite quickly the amount you owe will be a lower percentage of your income.

Think ahead to school fees if you are considering private education. Even now £30k a year is not unusual, will likely be a lot more by the time your dc is of secondary age. If you had another child for eg then you're looking at £5k a month today!

This thread has shown a really nasty side to some mumsnetters.

Its a reasonable question and a lot of the principles apply at whatever salary level /mortgage level

Op and her husband earn decent salaries but they are hardly Bezos levels.

I think you will be okay, but it depends how much you'll worry about it. Our large mortgage keeps me awake at night, especially as we are currently on a low fixed rate and in two years we will likely face a significant rise. Plus we are in late forties/early fifties with fifteen years to pay so no option to take the foot off the pedal in demanding and stressful jobs. Perils of working in London from early twenties and necessarily taking some time to save a deposit due to high rents and working up the chain to a decent salary bracket to be able to afford a large mortgage.

Wow you sound nice. Why would we be jealous? You admitted you have a horrible stressful job? I’ll take my easy work from home job for less money thanks. Why would I want a horrible stressful job? Life’s too short.

This thread is staggering - what the fuck is wrong with so many of you?
So what if she earns well? Are you really so embarrassingly jealous you can't just scroll on by? You have to pile on with yet another iteration of the same, tired snarky insults? The OP quite clearly doesn't give a fuck, but the comments keep piling on, just trying and trying to cause hurt or get a reaction.
Get a fucking life.

Yes

Its totally doable on this income. If your job is secure I would go for it. If not I would think twice about it as if one of you gets redundant, your house expenses will eat the other salary.

I personally wouldn't do it, as I think if one of us is jobless we will really struggle with such fixed cost.

If you can afford to overpay and get this down... maybe is OK.

I think you are getting a hard time. Everyone has the right to post these questions, even with a larger income. And, as detailed in my pp, we wouldn’t be able to afford it without some cut backs and we take home more than OP. I am very fortunate to be in my position too, but we cannot be prevented from uploading legitimate questions because the fact of the matter is, people earn these incomes (whether you like it or not).

This is definitely doable - I agree things to consider are building up a buffer of house savings and a buffer in your bills account.

if your looking at this now then you’ll already be on a higher mortgage rate and it may come down in the future.

we are on similar amounts, our mortgage is lower but nursery £2k per month and I was on mat leave for a year, and just about to go on mat leave again.

you’ve already said you spend pretty frugally, this has been the key to us. My husbands hobby is golf, my hobby is spending time at home in my house with my dogs, and we don’t go on extravagant holidays. Going for a weeks hiking holiday in the uk would always always be our preference than a week in the Maldives for example. Neither of us for big buyers of clothes or “stuff” or tech or anything. So general outgoings like that are pretty low for us.

I agree with people saying about what if one of you loses your job etc - hence the buffer in bills money above. You can’t predict what’s going to happen tomorrow, equally I feel the risk shouldn’t dictate how you live today!

an enormous part of our life is happiness from living in a home we love and enjoy spending time in.

Agreed. What a braggy and gross thread.

Yes you can afford it in principle and still have lots of leftover income.

However, whether you can afford it in reality is different.

If it's a large house then the utility bills will be significant, as will council tax and insurance; especially if the property is worth over £1m.

Larger houses require proportionally more maintenance - e.g. more rooms to decorate, more bathrooms to keep fresh and modern, a larger kitchen to replace, more radiators, a bigger boiler, a larger garden, more fence panels. You get the picture.

Does it need a refurb or any construction work? That is hugely expensive now compared to five years ago.

What else do you spend your money on? If you also like several long-haul holidays a year and have expensive hobbies or love high-end cars or eat out often or have posh gym memberships and PTs then clearly you need to budget for those and your lifestyle may not allow for a larger mortgage.

What are your long-term financial aspirations? If you wish to retire early or develop a passive income or set your child up with a home then you may be wiser to go for a less expensive home and invest money elsewhere. That's something to speak to a financial advisor about.

Finally, are you happy to take on a large mortgage with the risks involved (e.g. if one of you were to lose your job/become too ill to work). That will depend on your own appetite for risk.

As others have suggested it's certainly worth going through your bank and credit card statements and seeing what you actually spend versus what you think you spend. I'd also strongly recommend speaking an independent financial advisor to ensure your lifestyle and appetite for risk marries with your financial goals. You're in an extremely privileged position financially so make the most of it!

In fairness to the op, I don't think 'stoppages' is a common term AT ALL in the UK.

I work for a major bank (for well over a decade). I have a banking qualification. I've worked (briefly) in HR at that bank. I've spent a long time overseeing departments that deal with financial difficulties - so the main job of many staff I manage is to discuss customer affordability. I'm a frequent flyer on the money boards on here, on MSE forums etc and I'd consider myself generally financially literate to a decent degree.

I worked out what 'stoppages' meant from the wider context of the post - but I had to chuck it in Google to confirm I was right. I've NEVER come across that term before. Not in a career in banking and finance, not personally on many many money forums etc.

They might not of ever needed to budget before, with high incomes they may of had a relaxed view on budgeting because they’ve always had plenty of money. Now they are getting tied into a mortgage they have to be able to know they have enough. If someone said I’ve only got £1500 a month how can I budget for a £900 mortgage, the responses would be totally different.