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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask if your brain ever gets quiet

136 replies

thatsalad · 27/05/2025 22:44

As in, you literally are not thinking any thoughts?

YABU - yes
YANBU - no

OP posts:
BlueEyedBogWitch · 28/05/2025 08:00

BooneyBeautiful · 28/05/2025 04:39

Last year I was told I probably have ADHD and possibly ASD as well. Am waiting for a formal assessment. Someone said to try this. Think to yourself, "I wonder what my next thought will be". Give it a go!

Oh my god. I tried this, and suddenly entered a world of peace and quiet!

Wtf!?

Are you some kind of brain whisperer? Thank you so much!

I have a quiet brain for the first time I can remember!

fox919 · 28/05/2025 07:59

The only time I think no thoughts is when I’m reading - unless thinking the words I’m reading counts as thinking thoughts?

faerietales · 28/05/2025 07:46

No. I am autistic though!

SteakBakesAndHotTakes · 28/05/2025 07:45

I have gone through periods of being very quiet and calm and not thinking of anything. When I have a lot of energy or am anxious though the thoughts are constant. I do have ADHD

Octavia64 · 28/05/2025 07:45

I have a quiet brain. My DD has adhd and she has the opposite of a loud brain.

I can “talk to myself” inside my brain but it takes effort. I do sometimes have songs going round in there but that’s quite unusual.

my DD says that she finds it difficult to focus because she has too much going on in there.

i don’t. I decide to do something (read a book, cook a meal, whatever) and my brain mostly (exceptions are if I’m ill or very stressed) just concentrates on that. I forget everything else.

i only really have one tab open at once. Sometimes two or three but no more.

can’t imagine what your minds must be like.

Fairyliz · 28/05/2025 07:41

Surely your brain is like a machine that is meant to be turned on all of the time to keep your body functioning; and if it’s turned off you are dead?
I have learned to calm mine for sleep bu concentrating on nice things. Currently it’s the flowers I am growing for my garden.

Overthebow · 28/05/2025 07:24

Mine is never quiet, there’s many thoughts racing at the same time, conversations that have and haven’t happened, planning what to say, different scenarios and how they are likely to play out, replaying events like a video. It’s difficult to concentrate on anything else. I do have diagnosed ADHD and ASD.

AndImBrit · 28/05/2025 07:17

I’m baffled by the people who think you can’t quiet your brain. I can definitely choose not to think about anything. If I’m stressed or worried it’s a bit harder, but I can still choose not to think about those things. Then it’s just a peace and calm feeling, but no actual thoughts or anything that I can articulate. Sometimes a thought drifts in and then back out if I don’t focus on it.

starrynight009 · 28/05/2025 07:13

No. I don't know how it's possible to have a quiet brain and not be thinking of something.

MikeRafone · 28/05/2025 07:06

The more I cycle the quieter my mind becomes

nit only that, it makes stuff ok and sometimes I solve a problem

30 miles its balanced 50 is peaceful and 80 and you can hear a pin drop

SlieveMiskish · 28/05/2025 06:44

SSRI Medication helped calm my very loud brain, weird dreams and nightmares..

Perplexed20 · 28/05/2025 06:41

Only when I meditate, and that's been and still is a long road.

BountifulPantry · 28/05/2025 06:38

XWKD · 28/05/2025 04:41

Nope. I tried meditation and it made me suicidal. It was terrifying. It still scares me, although I'm mentally well now.

I’m so sorry this happened.

Do you know why it made you suicidal? What happened? I’m interested in meditation so just curious. Sorry really personal questions.

XWKD · 28/05/2025 04:41

Nope. I tried meditation and it made me suicidal. It was terrifying. It still scares me, although I'm mentally well now.

BooneyBeautiful · 28/05/2025 04:39

Boxingshibes · 27/05/2025 22:48

Nope it can be a nightmare especially when trying to get to sleep. But I have adhd ( diagnosed nearly 30 years ago)
Typing this i can hear the words in my brain. Trying to go to sleep i usually focus my brain on a story/daydream or think of a picture and focus on that.

Last year I was told I probably have ADHD and possibly ASD as well. Am waiting for a formal assessment. Someone said to try this. Think to yourself, "I wonder what my next thought will be". Give it a go!

Flipslop · 28/05/2025 04:35

SweetSound · 27/05/2025 22:57

It never used to be, but I’ve learnt how to quieten it now.

Please tell us how 🙏

sweetpickle2 · 28/05/2025 04:33

For people who can’t switch their brains off when trying to sleep- you need brown noise. It’s like white noise but a slightly lower frequency, and it’s perfect for ADHD brains. I have a white noise machine with all different sounds that goes on with the brown noise setting when I go to bed and it’s the only time all day my brain is still and quiet. It’s literally like someone has flipped the switch off, it’s delicious.

For those saying “nobody has a quiet brain”- yes they do! I am ND, my partner is not, as PP said unthread he often lays in bed for ages in the morning without a single thought- meanwhile I’ve planned our next holiday, mentally repainted the bathroom, put together the food shopping list, and had several imaginary conversations.

WallaceinAnderland · 28/05/2025 02:41

I don't think it's possible for brains to have no thoughts at all, even very simple processing, unless you are asleep or sedated.

VoltaireMittyDream · 28/05/2025 01:38

I have an ADHd diagnosis. My brain is conducting 7 different hypothetical conversations and composing 3 emails and singing 2 songs at any given time.

My DH, meanwhile (ASD) can spend hours just lying on the sofa looking out the window, and if I ask him what he’s thinking, he gives me a blankly placid smile and says ‘I’m not. I’m just looking.’

I can’t imagine what that’s like. But I am certain there is a correlation between the beatific emptiness of his mind and the heaviness of my mental load 😠

outerspacepotato · 28/05/2025 01:29

Sometimes during meditation and when I hit that flow state during physical activity or painting or playing music.

Wonderwoman333 · 28/05/2025 00:28

My brain never stops going, relentless thoughts, songs, conversations, planning, reflection etc. I thought it was perfectly normal until my dh told me that his brain is silent a lot of time. I just don't understand how that is possible.
I can't sleep without the tv on as a silent environment makes my brain seem louder. I'm wondering about the possibility that I may have ADHD although I'm generally quiet and calm in demeanour but my brain isn't.

EBearhug · 28/05/2025 00:25

There are various ribbons of thought running at any time. Always a music channel (currently on calon lân.) Other things depends on what going on. I can foreground a particular thread if needed (usually) but most of the other stuff is still there in the background, ready to rise up to the surface. I can focus and meditate, but I can't imagine being completely silent. I think it must be sometimes when I sleep, but usually if I'm aware of sleeping, it's because of vivid and active dreams, so not then.

RubyHiker · 28/05/2025 00:12

I'm another silent Brainer. I have an inner voice but unless I engage her she is quiet.

It freaks my husband out as his head is constantly going. We sleep with a white noise machine in our room for our baby and it soothes him but drives me mad because it breaks my nice silence. I always thought he was the weird one until we talked about this with friends recently.

rosemarble · 28/05/2025 00:06

Hennibg · 27/05/2025 23:35

That must be incredible, I feel so exhausted and agitated all the time

Have you tried any sort of mindfulness or meditation?

thatsalad · 27/05/2025 23:59

ElidaGibbs · 27/05/2025 23:37

I'm not sure if I'd call them thoughts exactly, but what I do have is my own voice talking constantly inside my head. It seems to be having a conversation with somebody, but the other person doesn't get a word in edgeways. It describes past events, what other people did, how I was feeling, etc. It's quite frustrating because it constantly distracts me from real-life conversations/situations, and it makes it very difficult for me to concentrate when I'm listening to the radio (my inner voice does however seem to enjoy watching TV and also scrolling through MN, because both of these make it shut up for a bit!).

The ironic thing is that if you were to meet me IRL, you'd probably think I was very quiet!

But that's what thoughts are

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