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Original poster

Wedding invitation dilemma

61 replies

ToffeeSheep · 27/05/2025 17:38

Background: DD has a schoolfriend who she has known for about 18 years. Used to be close when they lived in the same city but DD moved away to uni 10 years ago and has stayed in that area. DD makes arrangements to see friend when she is home but friend invariably cancels, usually at the last minute. DD got engaged just before Christmas and we had a small celebration to which friend and her fiancé were invited. They were no shows on the night.

Friend’s wedding is this summer which DD has known about for a while, but she was not invited to the recent hen weekend. Wedding invite has now arrived - would DD be unreasonable to decline?

OP posts:
thepariscrimefiles · 27/05/2025 17:48

BethDuttonYeHaw · 27/05/2025 17:41

DD would be a drama llama for declining but if she wants to move on from the friendship then that’s the way to do it

Why would she be a drama llama for declining if she doesn't want to go? She obviously doesn't feel close to this friend any more.

PeapodMcgee · 27/05/2025 17:48

If your DD feels like she has been treated like shit (she has), and has been invited just to make up the numbers / politeness, then definitely decline. The ex friend has behaved exactly as you would if you were trying to get rid of someone, but not look the bad guy.

tuvamoodyson · 27/05/2025 17:47

thepariscrimefiles · 27/05/2025 17:46

Because she doesn't want to go?

Show quote history

Then don’t…

thepariscrimefiles · 27/05/2025 17:46

Geneticsbunny · 27/05/2025 17:41

Why would she decline?

Because she doesn't want to go?

tuvamoodyson · 27/05/2025 17:46

What’s her dilemma? Go or don’t…

CapitalAtRisk · 27/05/2025 17:44

More importantly, why are you getting involved in this?

ArtTheClownIsNotAMime · 27/05/2025 17:43

I can't imagine being unable to solve this dilemma without my mum posting on Mumsnet. If she wants to go, she goes. If she doesn't want to go, she doesn't go. That's how invitations work.

TheCurious0range · 27/05/2025 17:43

Why would she decline unless the dates were inconvenient? They are still friends albeit not as close as they were, she's been invited to the wedding, that's lovely.

SpunkySquid · 27/05/2025 17:43

So the “friend” no showed your DD’s engagement party and didn’t invite her to the Hen. I don’t think I’d go. The “friend” probably just wants the wedding gifts.

BethDuttonYeHaw · 27/05/2025 17:41

DD would be a drama llama for declining but if she wants to move on from the friendship then that’s the way to do it

Geneticsbunny · 27/05/2025 17:41

Why would she decline?