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Is it cheeky to ask to be paid over the holidays?

414 replies

Dogswimmingcompetition · 27/05/2025 14:11

I work as a tutor. I work for three different families.
Over the summer holidays, one family like me to keep working, one family don’t have tutoring at all over the summer, but pay me year round. The final family is the family I work with the most, I’ve taught their child for almost three years. For the first year it was year round, last year they went away last minute for summer (I didn’t realise this was the plan) and I wasn’t paid all summer. I get the majority of my income from them and found it a real struggle for a couple of months.
Their child finishes their exams in a couple of weeks and mentioned something about our last lesson being in a couple of weeks (much earlier than I expected) This will leave me without pay for 3 months, which will set me back a lot.
I’m unable to commit to other families who have asked for tutoring as they would want all the time, not just in the holidays.
Would it be cheeky to put this to the father and ask if there’s any way they can pay me over the holidays and explain the situation?
I enjoy working with this family and would rather stay with them if possible, I know that i’m valued there also as the mum has told me in the past that they’re keen to keep me/continue with me.

OP posts:
Dogswimmingcompetition · 29/05/2025 14:41

WutheringTights · 29/05/2025 14:22

There’s no harm in asking. If my kids tutor (who is great and it took some effort to find someone who’s a good fit) just unilaterally stopped working for me because of money I’d be really irritated that she didn’t approach me and ask for more money first. I’d probably pay more to keep her, depending on the amount. And if I say no then we both know where we stand.

OP: please speak to your clients and don’t expect them to somehow be kind readers. They can always say no. That is fine. And then you decide what to do with that no. Which is also fine.

Yes, I will do this after the last lesson, thank you 🙏

OP posts:
Dogswimmingcompetition · 29/05/2025 14:38

Palestar · 29/05/2025 13:39

You've quoted me replying to someone else (not you) who did not like that I agreed with what another person (obviously not me) said.

I'm not being nasty to anyone. You asked if you were being cheeky. You are. It's not the end of the world someone turns that into (a version of) CF on a forum that allows swearing.

I think you need to calm down. Don't bother feeling sad for me comma splice hope I can find happiness. Spend the summer drawing up contracts and brushing up on general subject knowledge.

I know you were replying to someone else.
I’m referring to the way your comments are, not constructive or helpful and just rude, patronising and nasty.

You just sound like a bit of a dick tbh.

OP posts:
delightfuldweeb · 29/05/2025 14:30

BuckChuckets · 29/05/2025 13:42

You've ignored every question about whether you've got a contract, so I'm assuming that means you haven't got one.

Number 1 - start using contracts.

I suppose you have a few options in terms of how you improve this going forward - a retainer, like other people have suggested, or maybe increase your rates a bit and divide the annual figure by 12, and they pay you monthly (though of course that won't work if it's not set hours each week/month).

Could you market yourself more over the summer, for catch up 'summer school's type session for kids that might need it?

If this is your only income, you really need to be a bit more clued up about your business.

This. Without a contract the parents can stop sessions whenever they want. Maybe that’s one of the reasons that they chose you, for the flexibility?
You can ask for a retainer but nothing more than that. You’ve learnt a harsh lesson here, OP.

Wolfiefan · 29/05/2025 14:26

If you haven’t asked for payment over the summer or a retainer fee before then I don’t think you can expect to suddenly introduce this. You’re not working so shouldn’t be paid. Surely you budget throughout the year to cover lost earnings. Or get a summer job.

WutheringTights · 29/05/2025 14:22

Palestar · 27/05/2025 14:16

You don't - you take on someone else over the summer and beyond. If you have space in Sept to pick them back up you do. If they want to keep you on, they'll offer.

There’s no harm in asking. If my kids tutor (who is great and it took some effort to find someone who’s a good fit) just unilaterally stopped working for me because of money I’d be really irritated that she didn’t approach me and ask for more money first. I’d probably pay more to keep her, depending on the amount. And if I say no then we both know where we stand.

OP: please speak to your clients and don’t expect them to somehow be kind readers. They can always say no. That is fine. And then you decide what to do with that no. Which is also fine.

BuckChuckets · 29/05/2025 13:42

You've ignored every question about whether you've got a contract, so I'm assuming that means you haven't got one.

Number 1 - start using contracts.

I suppose you have a few options in terms of how you improve this going forward - a retainer, like other people have suggested, or maybe increase your rates a bit and divide the annual figure by 12, and they pay you monthly (though of course that won't work if it's not set hours each week/month).

Could you market yourself more over the summer, for catch up 'summer school's type session for kids that might need it?

If this is your only income, you really need to be a bit more clued up about your business.

Palestar · 29/05/2025 13:39

Dogswimmingcompetition · 29/05/2025 13:32

What an unpleasant person you seem to be. What a shame.
Does it make you feel good to be nasty to others? Does it fill your life up a little more?
I feel sad for you, I hope you can find happiness and embrace it.

You've quoted me replying to someone else (not you) who did not like that I agreed with what another person (obviously not me) said.

I'm not being nasty to anyone. You asked if you were being cheeky. You are. It's not the end of the world someone turns that into (a version of) CF on a forum that allows swearing.

I think you need to calm down. Don't bother feeling sad for me comma splice hope I can find happiness. Spend the summer drawing up contracts and brushing up on general subject knowledge.

Dogswimmingcompetition · 29/05/2025 13:32

Palestar · 29/05/2025 10:47

You can definitely say either and it's nothing like thinking you're right regarding taking GCSE's / buying apple's / having dog's!

@Mrsttcno1 is obviously very confused, as she thinks 'fuck' is wrong because OP doesn't want to fuck anyone, but thinks 'fucker' would be better - because that's clearly not about fucking anyone??

Either way, based on no provision for additional payment outlined at the start, asking to be paid for no work is cheeky, and arguably trying to fuck the the client over.

What an unpleasant person you seem to be. What a shame.
Does it make you feel good to be nasty to others? Does it fill your life up a little more?
I feel sad for you, I hope you can find happiness and embrace it.

OP posts:
Palestar · 29/05/2025 10:47

Mrsttcno1 · 29/05/2025 10:21

Totally depends where you are clearly, where I am we all say cheeky fuck! Which is exactly what it is to expect to be paid when you’re self employed & not providing a service :)

If OP wants to be paid holidays then she needs to either work as an employee somewhere, or state a retainer in her contract. She has done neither of those things and now wants to ask to be paid for nothing, that’s the definition of a cheeky FUCK :)

You can definitely say either and it's nothing like thinking you're right regarding taking GCSE's / buying apple's / having dog's!

@Mrsttcno1 is obviously very confused, as she thinks 'fuck' is wrong because OP doesn't want to fuck anyone, but thinks 'fucker' would be better - because that's clearly not about fucking anyone??

Either way, based on no provision for additional payment outlined at the start, asking to be paid for no work is cheeky, and arguably trying to fuck the the client over.

Babyboomtastic · 29/05/2025 10:38

Uneven income is part and parcel off being self employed. You can't expect people to pay for you when your aren't working. Being blunt, you might get away with it when you are a very very experienced tutor, with a waiting list, if you are good enough that people would think it's with overlooking the cheekiness, but not many are in that position (and it doesn't sound like you are anywhere near being able to make those demands).

Your choices are to either even up your income by diversifying how you work, doing summer work camps, doing online tutoring abroad for students with a different exam session or get a summer job.

Or you accept that summer is quiet, save for it throughout the year, and enjoy the down time. Plan DIY jobs, give yourself a (cheap/ garden project. Go backpacking for a month. Enjoy that you have what very free other people have, with a long summer off.

You're self employed, so seize control of your own destiny.

Mrsttcno1 · 29/05/2025 10:21

nomas · 29/05/2025 04:58

Yes, they are wrong. OP is not a ‘cheeky fuck’ for wanting to be paid for holidays, if they want to retain her services.

And by the way, if you’re going to correct OP’s grammar, you should also have corrected @Mrsttcno1 - the correct term is ‘cheeky fucker’, not ‘cheeky fuck’. OP is not proposing to fuck anyone.

Totally depends where you are clearly, where I am we all say cheeky fuck! Which is exactly what it is to expect to be paid when you’re self employed & not providing a service :)

If OP wants to be paid holidays then she needs to either work as an employee somewhere, or state a retainer in her contract. She has done neither of those things and now wants to ask to be paid for nothing, that’s the definition of a cheeky FUCK :)

Palestar · 29/05/2025 10:09

nomas · 29/05/2025 04:58

Yes, they are wrong. OP is not a ‘cheeky fuck’ for wanting to be paid for holidays, if they want to retain her services.

And by the way, if you’re going to correct OP’s grammar, you should also have corrected @Mrsttcno1 - the correct term is ‘cheeky fucker’, not ‘cheeky fuck’. OP is not proposing to fuck anyone.

The question in the OP was whether it was cheeky. I happen to think it is, given the actual circumstances where she wants this now, and hadn't prepared for it professionally in advance.

I don't think you can take exception to the choice of words when someone reads that you expect to be paid for no work and have opened up judgement of this on a public form. Given her complaint about 'language', it had struck me that she herself had repeatedly made a particular mistake (indicating an underlying misconception about language), which shouldn't be present in someone teaching children.

I highly doubt PP will be tutoring other people's children in the various differences between 'fucker' or 'fuck', each employed as a noun.

nomas · 29/05/2025 04:58

Palestar · 27/05/2025 15:06

They aren't wrong, though.

And if you're bothered about language, stop writing GCSE's with an unnecessary apostrophe. It doesn't inspire confidence in your ability to help with homework tutor.

Yes, they are wrong. OP is not a ‘cheeky fuck’ for wanting to be paid for holidays, if they want to retain her services.

And by the way, if you’re going to correct OP’s grammar, you should also have corrected @Mrsttcno1 - the correct term is ‘cheeky fucker’, not ‘cheeky fuck’. OP is not proposing to fuck anyone.

lizzyBennet08 · 28/05/2025 15:56

Ah seriously every tutor I ever came across is term time only . No one is going to pay for you the summer months unless you’re Mary Poppins.

Cosyblankets · 28/05/2025 12:20

OP 26 is quite young to have tutoring as your main source of i income.
Are you a teacher? Did you work for a few years in a school and not like it?

LesserCelandine · 28/05/2025 11:51

Digdongdoo · 28/05/2025 11:45

No. I can perfectly well understand that any kind of contract the OP may have is woefully inadequate because she doesn't appear to know what it is.

’woefully inadequate’ doesn’t mean there isn’t a contract though. Nor does not understanding the contract you have in place automatically mean it is woefully inadequate. The only thing you can say is the contract she has in place doesn’t currently meet her needs.

Digdongdoo · 28/05/2025 11:45

LesserCelandine · 28/05/2025 11:35

If you are in any type of business then you urgently need to develop a better understanding of contracts.

No. I can perfectly well understand that any kind of contract the OP may have is woefully inadequate because she doesn't appear to know what it is.

mumonthehill · 28/05/2025 11:41

We have had a tutor for ds and he worked term time only. If we cancelled a session we paid, if he cancelled we did not. He was very oversubscribed and was good at swapping sessions if needed. We were told all this by him when we started so knew exactly what we were signing up for. As long as you are clear at the start how and when you work then there should be no issues.

ClawsandEffect · 28/05/2025 11:37

LesserCelandine · 28/05/2025 11:10

ClawsandEffect we had a tutor with more your way of working. As long as you gave 72 hours notice of cancellation you didn’t have to pay - because he always had a waiting list of people wanting extra sessions or regular slots. On the flip side, he occasionally asked us if we could shift times that week - we couldn’t always but when we could we did. The flexibility all round worked well. Though everything was flung up into the air after exams/over the summer holidays and there was an element of renegotiating slot times every autumn.

Yes, that is exactly how I work. And my most reliable and long standing parents (onto 2nd generation for some of my tutees now!) are the ones that get the pick of my time. Others have to fit around what is left.

I'm more flexible with students that are in the run-up to exams and will take them at times / on days I don't usually work.

But mess me around at your peril LOL! Most students need a good tutor a lot more than I need individual students.

LesserCelandine · 28/05/2025 11:35

Digdongdoo · 28/05/2025 11:32

Well no, because if there were any kind of contract in place OP wouldn't be confused about what to expect.
Which is why a contract of some description and business plan is essential.

If you are in any type of business then you urgently need to develop a better understanding of contracts.

Digdongdoo · 28/05/2025 11:32

LesserCelandine · 28/05/2025 10:05

Of course they do. You don’t understand how contracts are established or work. If you pop into your local shop to pick up some milk you have a contract with the shop when you pay for that milk. A contract just needs an offer, acceptance, consideration, and an intention for this to establish a legal relationship. None of that needs to be in writing. The client could still sue you if you spent the time watching Disney cartoons instead of tutoring the agreed subject.

Well no, because if there were any kind of contract in place OP wouldn't be confused about what to expect.
Which is why a contract of some description and business plan is essential.

LesserCelandine · 28/05/2025 11:10

ClawsandEffect we had a tutor with more your way of working. As long as you gave 72 hours notice of cancellation you didn’t have to pay - because he always had a waiting list of people wanting extra sessions or regular slots. On the flip side, he occasionally asked us if we could shift times that week - we couldn’t always but when we could we did. The flexibility all round worked well. Though everything was flung up into the air after exams/over the summer holidays and there was an element of renegotiating slot times every autumn.

ClawsandEffect · 28/05/2025 10:21

I'm a long term, and successful tutor. I don't have contracts. I rely on word of mouth for my client referrals. I've also only ever had one client who paid late. I ALMOST cancelled her but gave her a 2nd chance. I'm now on my 3rd year with her.

I have a waiting list and have agencies approach me with work. I'm also head hunted for teaching positions.

There is more than one standard way to operate as a tutor. But the best thing for me has been to diversify in what I do. I'm also an examiner for multiple exams/more than 1 exam board. I do online coaching and training of other teacher/tutors (I'm a qualified teacher). I develop materials and resources for websites. The combination of work types is what keeps me successful and also keeps me really up to date with teaching and my subject.

LesserCelandine · 28/05/2025 10:10

Of course she could give notice under the old contract and put a new contract in place. It sounds like the implied or verbally agreed terms of the old contract did not require any notice period.

LesserCelandine · 28/05/2025 10:05

Digdongdoo · 28/05/2025 09:30

She obviously doesn't though. Otherwise she wouldn't be in this situation 3 years down the road.

Of course they do. You don’t understand how contracts are established or work. If you pop into your local shop to pick up some milk you have a contract with the shop when you pay for that milk. A contract just needs an offer, acceptance, consideration, and an intention for this to establish a legal relationship. None of that needs to be in writing. The client could still sue you if you spent the time watching Disney cartoons instead of tutoring the agreed subject.

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