I just don't have enough money

I think you have 2 problems. First is immediate problem of how do you pay the bills right now. That’s going to be more hours worked. You both work part time right now so you simply need some more hours. Anything will do- McDonald’s night shift at the weekend? They’re literally always hiring. Pub at the weekend? 8 hours extra per week would probably do it. If you both got an 8 hour shift at the weekend that would be a game changer.

The longer term issue is you both being min wage/ close to min wage earners. You need some form of plan to get a skill that will improve your earnings. I’m not really talking Uni, as that’s expensive.

I would start by doing some research about what skills are needed in your area and work backwards from there. So the steps would be:

1. where is hiring nearby that’s a good salary with progression
2. what skills do I need to be able to do those jobs
3. is it realistic for me to get those skills
4. where can I get those skills/ quals in my area
5. how do I balance work with getting those quals.

Ideally there would be an employer in your area who is always hiring for a specific role which requires a qualification you can get at a night class in your local area.

OR a remote employer is hiring x job which needs Y skill that you can study for online.

A couple of years ago DH had his hours cut. They kept him on but he lost 2 days a week. It was really, really hard as it came out of nowhere. Also an extra kick in the teeth as he loved his job.

We survived as he picked up extra minimum wage work. He did a zero hour bar contract and then he got a part time job at Tesco. We also considered warehouse work before this. It wasn’t ideal and the pay was less than he was getting at his usual job but we had to survive. DH is a skilled individual, especially within his field but he had to swallow his pride and do what he needed to, to survive. It always baffles me when people can’t get a job in their field so they would rather not work at all. You’re both working part time hours OP. One of you needs to up that.

We lived like this for approx 7 months whilst he searched for another job and thankfully he got one. He is much happier now and on much more money as progression is a lot faster as current company too.

At 200 a week and 3-400 a week respectively both of you are hardly working. It's what, 15, 20 hours a week?
Its not reasonable to expect to sustain a family off barely a full time job between you, especially as these are low wage jobs.
If your partners job is not delivering the hours it used to, he needs to look for a new, full time permanent job that will guarantee a full time income, and you need to up your hours considerably as you are barely working 2 days per week.

Money isn't free! You have to work for it.

Just come to say you don’t need to post your income and outgoings to justify feeling like this. It’s f*cking tough at the moment and it feels relentless!

There are plenty of online budget calculators and switching sites to help you analyse your unavoidable costs, your avoidable ones, and ones you can get better deals on
E.g. if you're paying more than £5 per device per month for phones/tablets etc. you can switch and save a fortune (reduced my friend's phone costs from £123 to £15 by switching to Lebara)
Similar saving exist for utilities, supermarket shopping, mortgages etc.

On the list of out goings these are not on the list
Are these being paid also ?

Work pension contributions

Home contents & insurance

Hair cuts

Dentist

Holidays/days out

Birthdays

Christmas

Medecines

Savings

I've just switched from Vodafone mobile £28 per month to Lebara which is on the Vodafone network... £1.99 per month for 6 months then goes up to £8 per month, I can't believe how much this has saved me! Was scared to take the leap but I'm glad I did. No difference, same number and same phone

Hope things improve for you really soon.

Haven’t RTFT so apologies if someone else has suggested this - but have you tried talking to CAB and see if there are any benefits you can claim? I’m sure there are some top-up benefits sometimes available.

Congratulations on buying your house though, that’s a great achievement. When it’s paid off in the future you’ll be so glad you’re not renting anymore.

The issue is that your dh's work has dried up. He probably need to look elsewhere for a complete change of role, and in the meantime look for a side hustle like you have done. Has he got any skills like DIY or gardening? Lots of people need their gardens tidied/fences repainted etc at this time of year. Or could he do some shift work? My parents went through a similarly tough time in the early 90s - they both had full time jobs but it wasn't paying the bills so there was a period when they were both doing extra work in the evenings- some evenings dad did taxi shifts and others mum worked at McDonald's. Fortunately Dad then found a better paid full time job.

Have you checked you wouldn't qualify for UC if you had childcare bill. It may well work out better for you as you seem to be on the threshold.

Could your husband find a more reliable regular job and freelance/ do whatever it is he does now as an extra?

OP has mentioned depression, hardly surprising.

No I think the point is OP is just not telling the truth about their circumstances

No it doesn't?

Obviously.

But wanting to vent/ moan is fine.

There is a massive blame culture, when actually it is the fault of the government/ world leaders. Sure you can blame OP for taking time out to raise her children or not having the foresight to do further training to increase her income or whatever. Years ago, she wouldn't have had to. There have always been a lot of people in society like OP, working and living day to day, who in the past have done fine. OP isn't alone in her approach to life, not by a long shot.

What is the point in nitpicking and blaming OP about what she could/ should have done, without an understanding of the wider context? The truth is that the state of the world currently just makes it a lot harder than it has previously been.

It's fair enough for OP and all in her position to feel frustrated. Many of us know people aged 60/65+ who raised 3 children on a single income, own a lovely house, etc. They had a lifestyle that is now a fantasy and we can't expect what they took for granted.

Obviously there's a lot OP can do. There's a lot that most people can do save more and make more money if we want to. I'm not sure OP needs advice. Obviously working and earning more, careful budgeting and cutting out treats = more money. That's not rocket science.

But the gradual degradation of the quality of living in the UK is just all a bit shit, isn't it? It's OK to feel annoyed and upset about the fact that life in the UK isn't what it used to be.

Yes & repeatedly.

Ideas for you and husband which don't take years of training..

Work as a mower, pruner for older people.
Cleaner businesses - cleaning offices, schools, and new house builds.
Sell things on ebay.
House painter's assistant.
Train as a learn to swim instructor.
Any jobs as lolly pop holder on school crossings.
Any sign holder jobs in road construction.
Gain your RSA qualification and ask for work at weddings, golf clubs and Pubs.
After school and before school care.

I work 10pm-6am in a supermarket. I do the equivalent of 2 days per week, but they're worked as 4 on 10 off.

Weekend nights are ones we always struggle to recruit; we have staff that work every weekend around other jobs.

I hate my job and it is very physically demanding, but there's also a staff discount (once through probation), plus other benefits which are quite generous.

There's usually overtime available for the Christmas period.

@NewMoonToday

Your utilities sound quite a lot at £150 a month so maybe you can economise there.

i pay £150 a month for g&e so seems normal.

'Just having a moan' doesn't change anything though.

Although doing something constructive like reviewing your budget or working more seems to be too much to expect these days.

Our school won’t allow under 16 to collect. Even Siblings even with parents written permission

I don’t understand what your dh is doing in the 30 hours a week that he used to be working and now isn’t. Can he not either:
retrain as it sounds like his skills are no longer useful
get a delivery job eg pizzas at the weekends?
do school run for you so you can work more?
or all the above?

This is the fundamental problem I think, your dh has not only had a wage cut, which is highly unusual and not the way things usually go as we get more experienced, but is also working about half the hours he previously worked. He needs to sort this out asap.

you should also be looking to retrain. Even things like nails or lashes are realistically very easy but you could do as a side hustle.

You're working 50 hours a week between you on low wages , we would be squeezed if we worked that amount between us and we both work in skilled professions (but live in the south east and our mortgage is more than double yours).
Even now we both have second contracts, my husband does at least two Saturdays a month and I do at least a week on call 24/7, one of you needs to get an evening job, even bar work or cleaning to bring some money in when the other has the children.

I work in the public sector and there hasn't been a time in the last 16 years I haven't had a second job/contract, most of my colleagues are the same. I'm not saying that's fine but it's reality, you can't get by on two part time wages

Was it sweeping chimneys @Muffinmam ?

and now do you feed your family of 8 for £14.10 a week?

The cost of living has increased significantly and likely will continue to do so.

It's understandable that someone might feel frustrated that the lifestyle they could have had years ago will no longer sustain them.

OP just wanted a moan and that's fine.