To ask what’s the most ridiculous injury you’ve given yourself?

I dislocated my jaw on Sunday after getting a bit to enthusiastic belting out some 80's bangers at a BBQ.

This thread is hilarious 😆 I’m imaging all these amazing women having comedy accidents

4.30am on the way to the airport, to fly to Malta on holiday, I bent over to open car door but forgot to move my head. Corner of door hit me in the eye. Whole eye was black by time I got to the Airport and stayed black all week.
Spent all week telling people how I had done it, whether they asked or not, so they didn't think DP had done it.

Recently hurt my knee sliding down a fireman’s pole at a kids playground 😡

Thank you i I feel very very lucky to be alive when I think back about it and me and ds did it together until paramedics came. They were very impresed with the perfect team.
That's my positive. 🙏💪xx

Playing table tennis ( badly) missed the ping pong ball, then tried to get it but accidentally trod on it, lost my footing and dislocated my knee.

I've just burnt my thumb on a pop tart

I shaved my air hair and took a substantial slice of skin too by accident.

@Monty27 OMG thats an epic scar, it sounds like you are lucky to be alive!

On an early spring sunny day I got all the garden paraphernalia onto the grass and hosed it all down.
Later at dusk I remembered I still had a wash so ran out to get it in tripping into a glass coffee table I used as a tier for pots. I was lucky my son was home to put a tourniquet on my leg and a chair to hold my leg up and stem the bleeding.
An overnight stay in hospital innumerable internal stitches and 19 outer staples.
Three years later I bear a scar to remind me not to be over zealous 😯

Cassocks everywhere!!! Hahaha 😂 😂 😂 😂

On holiday abroad many years ago. Mum asked me if I wanted a sweet. When I said yes, she said 'catch' whilst throwing the sweet across the room to me.
Said sweet hit me straight between the eyes.
Next day I had a black eye.
I took great delight in telling people my Mum had given me a black eye....
She was mortified.

Burnt my knee with the iron. I was too lazy to get the ironing board out so was ironing on a towel on the floor.

I was 6 and my dad draughted us as slave labour got me and older sister to help on his allotment, one freezing day. The earth was hard and I was bashing away with a fork, when I rammed it through my welly, foot and into the ground.

I squealed for help, he told me to stop mucking about and wrenched the fork out. It didn't hurt much.

At home, he gave me Hell for having a wet foot. That was because the welly had two holes in it.

I took my sock off and showed him the two holes in my foot, no sympathy!

not one usually to do gardening one time when I did stood on a rake which went straight through my foot that was so painful not sure if as bad as being hit in face by one but not the best thing to do!

Jesus some of these accidents are akin to the Final Destination films.

I was blending some strawberries and paused to wipe the blade with my finger. Unfortunately my other hand decided to push the ‘on’ button at that moment and my finger got blended. God, it was painful!

Ended up in A&E having my fingertip stitched back together. It’s still a bit numb several years later 😮

Suffice to say those blended strawberries never did get eaten…

This is one of the funniest posts I’ve ever read. I’m laughing my head off but in sympathy! I’m one of the clumsiest people you’ll ever meet but don’t want to post here because I’ll give myself away immediately 🤣

One that makes me laugh every time was when I decided to paint my downstairs toilet while my husband was on night shift and I’d had a few wines. I didn’t want to stand on the toilet lid in case I broke it so stood on the seat which slid sideways as I was moving around. My foot shot straight down the toilet and got jammed in the u-bend. Luckily I didn’t fall backwards, I don’t think I’d have been able to get up off the floor. I got away with it being very swollen and black and blue for a couple of weeks 🤣

I'm adding socks, toenails and being undressed in any way to the banned list.

My partner walked downstairs holding the baby. Stepped in fresh cat sick with socks on. Hopped off to put the baby down, took socks off, cut himself during on his own toenail

😂 😂
I was mortified too , it was a Main Street 🙈
You feel then that every single person has come to a stop to look at you 😂

Oops wrong thread

@ScaryM0nster , I also broke my little toe by catching on the skirting board, I was having a midnight wee, with nothing in my feet and no lights on. I also broke my thumb trying to remove some ice from an ice tray.

fell out of bed broke three toes
in the 70s mum had nylon sheets those brushed things caught by big toe nail in a bright orange one and ripped off my big toe nail
was moving a fridge and ripped off the same big toe nail few years later
hand sliced open on a corned beef tin when i was making sandwiches those keys are lethal
sliced hand open on a foil cheesecake dish trying to unwrap it
cleaning sink one day grabbed a disposable razor cut my hand wide open

Did the A+E staff ban you from DIY after trip number 3?