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Keeping pictures from previous relationships

36 replies

OnePotatoTwoPotatoThree · 26/05/2025 05:15

Just as the title says. I just want to know what the norm/acceptable is in regard's to keeping pictures from previous relationships. He gave me his laptop to view some pictures we took today and a picture with his ex popped up. To be fair he quickly immediately closed it. It wasn’t a casual picture, it was one where they were showing affection on a holiday. This is the second time such picture will come up. It did make me feel some type of way as we were on holiday too. When i brought it up he said he doesn’t want to delete them as they were part of his experience in life and that he wants to be able to look look back at them when he’s old as part of his experience in life.
It honestly doesn't sit well with me, or maybe im just being silly. He’s definitely not getting back with her. I just dont want pictures of him being affectionate or romantic with another girl popping up randomly in my face.
I thought of suggesting he files them in a separate folder away from his main one or archive it somewhere instead, but i dont even think that’s right. Why keep them for God’s sake if the relationship has ended?

OP posts:
Cupboardlovely · 26/05/2025 07:23

I’m not sure.
i have a lot of photos of exh on my google photos. Most of them are holding my children or in the background somehow. It would take me ages to go through and delete them.

OnePotatoTwoPotatoThree · 26/05/2025 07:18

KitsyWitsy · 26/05/2025 06:27

But you wondered why he wanted to keep them at all? I think that's why people are thinking you're suggesting he should delete them.

How often can these pics pop up? I wouldn't delete any of my pics and I wouldn't expect it of my bf either. Sometimes I see pics of his ex wife on his SM from memories or whatever. He's with me now, so who cares?

Yes you’re right. I see why people will think that. I just honestly wouldn’t want to see them every now and again. He’s a lovely man and i do love him so much.

OP posts:
Missedthis · 26/05/2025 06:39

Listen to this:

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=HO-31CVnLes

TL:DL (too long don’t listen😂) : his past loved have made him who he is - be grateful they’ve done a good job, he’s with you now.

- YouTube

Enjoy the videos and music that you love, upload original content and share it all with friends, family and the world on YouTube.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=HO-31CVnLes

KitsyWitsy · 26/05/2025 06:27

OnePotatoTwoPotatoThree · 26/05/2025 05:45

Thanks very much for all the responses. I never suggested or said to him to delete them. I just said i didn't want to keep seeing them. I also didn't suggest anything about what to do with the pictures going forward. Perhaps i should go with what i was thinking - file them in a folder so that I dont keep accidentally clicking on them.

But you wondered why he wanted to keep them at all? I think that's why people are thinking you're suggesting he should delete them.

How often can these pics pop up? I wouldn't delete any of my pics and I wouldn't expect it of my bf either. Sometimes I see pics of his ex wife on his SM from memories or whatever. He's with me now, so who cares?

Danglinglights · 26/05/2025 06:14

I have some old pictures. They are just part of my life. I don’t know if it’s right or wrong but I’m not binning them (these are proper photos in a box as I’m old).

OnePotatoTwoPotatoThree · 26/05/2025 05:45

Thanks very much for all the responses. I never suggested or said to him to delete them. I just said i didn't want to keep seeing them. I also didn't suggest anything about what to do with the pictures going forward. Perhaps i should go with what i was thinking - file them in a folder so that I dont keep accidentally clicking on them.

OP posts:
Rumplestrumpet · 26/05/2025 05:42

I think filing them away so they don't pop up randomly on the screen is fine. Asking him to delete them is not reasonable.

LHR2JFK · 26/05/2025 05:41

Why keep them for God’s sake if the relationship has ended?

He told you why. He wants to have them when he is older to look back on as part of life’s experience.

The problem is you think he needs your permission, or to offer a reason that you get to decide is acceptable.

You are being off the wall horrible, and super controlling.
If you think there is something in it, or you can’t cope with it, then do everyone a favour and end the relationship.

daisychain01 · 26/05/2025 05:39

i wouldn't be concerned about images from past relationships, but that depends on how your relationship is in all other ways. If he can't stop talking about his ex, then the images just adds to the big picture that maybe he isn't over her. It also depends how long you've been dating this man.

in general terms there is no need to eradicate every trace of one's former life if the relationship is rock solid. I still have my wedding photos from DH1 who I lost before I met DH2 (I'm sure I've got group photos including a few people I've dated) but they aren't out on display - my DH2 wouldn't even consider telling me to get rid of them, it wouldn't enter his head, but we've always been close so there's confidence there that a few photos wont shake.

PhiladelphiaEagles · 26/05/2025 05:36

I think it’s ok for him to keep them and I can understand that he wants to as they’re part of the life he has lived.

He should put them in a separate folder though and they shouldn’t be popping up for you to see.

UneasyMe · 26/05/2025 05:34

Totally unreasonable to expect him to delete his photos.

If they’re popping up as ‘featured photos’ he can change the settings to not feature her.