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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Racist husband

35 replies

BePinkTurtle · 25/05/2025 22:07

I don’t really know what I want here, just some space to tell things I wouldn’t be able to bring up anywhere else. My husband is known for his extreme views, and I find it very challenging. He thinks that he is a good person and it’s fine to say what he thinks because he thinks his views are harmless and he is entitled to them. We have constant fights about it. We were having dinner and wine just now (too much of wine) and taking, and I couldn’t get to the end of the sentence of what I was trying to say because he was talking over me. I ended up shouting and called me a nazi and faschist.
I feel like there is no way back from this. I have nowhere to go and have no family in this country.

OP posts:
MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 25/05/2025 22:29

I'm sorry, OP. You need to start planning an exit strategy.

Morningsleepin · 25/05/2025 22:27

Sometimes leaving requires planning

Wolfiefan · 25/05/2025 22:27

You have constant fights and he is racist. You need to find a way to leave.

Teanbiscuits33 · 25/05/2025 22:26

You don’t marry a racist without knowing they are a racist before you marry them. I reckon you would have had an inkling. Unless he’s been radicalised by the TikTok algorithm - that’s a possibility I suppose, but more likely he already was and social media has made him feel emboldened.

Nataliaa · 25/05/2025 22:25

It’s never ‘fine’ to be a racist.

CaptainFuture · 25/05/2025 22:22

I ended up shouting and called me a nazi and faschist.
He called you a nazi and fascist?..
Or you called him one?
What are his views?

DandelionPockets · 25/05/2025 22:18

I've literally never said this on Mumsnet before, but...LTB.

19lottie82 · 25/05/2025 22:16

What did he say?

hattie43 · 25/05/2025 22:15

Time to leave OP. He sounds awful

Zanatdy · 25/05/2025 22:09

sorry but i’d absolutely draw the line with being married to a racist.